Corruption and Anarchy 16.2 Trash Talking thread

All righty, in order ...

Doing fine, Chris, thanks for asking. How're you?

Jon, the Braxtons are not interesting. Would taking their tops off MAKE them interesting? Probably, at least until a larger cup size shows up. But at the moment, no - the novelty of female competitors in FMW has worn off, and they've alternately called themselves hot, awesome, and amazing so many times that all three words have lost both their impact and their meaning. They are, collectively, Alberto Del Rio shouting "destiny" over and over again.

And finally ... yes, Blake. Homely-looking. Focus less on the ladies and more on your impending title match.

Jonathon King wrote:

King: Thing is, the girls are interesting, Anwyl's not. Even if the worst comes to pass and people stop paying attention, if the girls want a higher rating for their segments, all they have to do is take their tops off. Anwyl would have to actually get a personality, talent or a reputation as being more entertaining than the camera-guy.

Anwyl: King here is implying that the girls need to be slutty to get over in any appearances they make during a show, re-alliterating what I had to say in the beginning.

I'm going to pretend you didn't add that last bit. I know you're still a little green at the moment.

Longoria wrote:

Sage: Rosie O'Donnell has bigger boobs than us; does that mean you'd rather see her take her top off? Idiot.

Santana: Also, green isn't a good colour on you, love. Stop being so jealous of us. Everybody ♥'s us here.

Everyone? Try King and Vendetta. And I'm aware that green isn't my color; that's why I've got gold on.

Anwyl wrote:

Jonathon King wrote:

King: Thing is, the girls are interesting, Anwyl's not. Even if the worst comes to pass and people stop paying attention, if the girls want a higher rating for their segments, all they have to do is take their tops off. Anwyl would have to actually get a personality, talent or a reputation as being more entertaining than the camera-guy.

Anwyl: King here is implying that the girls need to be slutty to get over in any appearances they make during a show, re-alliterating what I had to say in the beginning.

I'm going to pretend you didn't add that last bit. I know you're still a little green at the moment.

King: Ah yes, I forgot the selective hearing that so permeates the roster. Since you want to pretend I didn't add it, allow me to restate it. You're boring, effectively talent-less and even I look like Randy Fucking Savage in comparison to your bland ass.

Anwyl: I'm just looking at some previous matches of yours right now. Now at 15.1 you were handed the Television Title and lost to Damien Inferno, good start.

15.2 Pinfall victory over Dazz Andrews *yawn* that made you look soooooo good.

15.3 Beats Smoochy Da Frog, no creditability gained there!

First elimination in the Lethal Injection Tournament, so Randy Savage there!

And then you lose your title to Jimmy Ice at 16.1!

Two wins!? That didn't do anything for your image! You look pretty soft out there son. Nothing to brag about in the last five shows. Zilch, zero, nadda! But apparently having no personality can get me a C-4 Championship match, no talent allows me to beat Skyler Striker, Alex O'Rion and Doc Derrick?! Oh yeah, what's your excuse now?!

Longoria wrote:

David GS wrote:

Longoria wrote:

Sage: Rosie O'Donnell has bigger boobs than us; does that mean you'd rather see her take her top off? Idiot.

Santana: Also, green isn't a good colour on you, love. Stop being so jealous of us. Everybody ♥'s us here.

Everyone? Try King and Vendetta. And I'm aware that green isn't my color; that's why I've got gold on.

Sage: No, actually, nearly everyone in this roster loves us and the rest of them are just jealous. P.S. You suck.

Santana: We can choose to be "slutty" if we wanted to but we don't; we're just going to let our superior wrestling ability and flawless appearance talk for us.

Anwyl: So you're not going to say much?

They are why people drink to forget things. Namely, drinking to forget ever working in the same place as them.

Clever, Anwyl. Very clever.

*rolls eyes*

As it were, ladies, please shut up. Neither of you have said anything intelligent or meaningful since you got here, and dicking around in the undercard, successfully or otherwise, gives you no ground on which to base these claims of "superior" wrestling ability.

Aaaand yet we've beaten your GSW boys more times than a redneck can count (especially JoKing, he's like a living punching bag)

It's either insulting or lying. Hell, could be both.

And Jack, you really oughta know better than to mock any piece of gold, given that right now your only claim to fame is a failed experiment of a stable.

David GS wrote:

Doing fine, Chris, thanks for asking. How're you?

Bored out of my mother fucking mind.

Also, to the two women who claim to look hotter than Faith.

Let's see, on one hand you have an athletic, attractive raven-haired mute that doesn't talk your head off.

On the other hand, you have two not as athletic, raven-haired socialites that seemingly cannot shut up when it comes to talking about whatever attractiveness they may or may not possess. Also, it is alleged, NOT proven but alleged, that you two spend more time in "Face down, Ass up" position than a Yoga instructor of the Muslim faith. These are mere claims, mind you but still.

Now, you tell me who's hotter.

If you're wondering where I stand, I have a strong distaste for sluts these days, even if they just play them on TV. But know this, I do find your level of confidence rather impressive, Braxton Twins.

Austin wrote:

...Also, it is alleged, NOT proven but alleged, that you two spend more time in "Face down, Ass up" position than a Yoga instructor of the Muslim faith. These are mere claims

Anwyl: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

Slutty McStutface wrote:

Sage: Oh and Anwyl, leave and never come back. And while you're at it, wipe that stupid look off your face before I bitchslap it off.

Anwyl: Please, refrain from touching me. I don't want to get any of the diseases you may or may not have been checked for, if you do touch me I have no other choice than to make this a legal matter, as I am not with the company at this moment. We wouldn't want an assault charge to tarnish your record.

Easty wrote:

Longoria wrote:

Sage: How are we insulting her? We're just saying that we're better than her in every capacity of life.

Uh... 'foul she-beast'? That ring any bells?

David GS wrote:

It's either insulting or lying. Hell, could be both.

And Jack, you really oughta know better than to mock any piece of gold, given that right now your only claim to fame is a failed experiment of a stable.

Wind your neck in, David. I wouldn't want to have to break it.

Let's see what I've done now; one-half of the first ever FMW Tag Team Champions and the only man to contest for them singularly; a member of the most successful stable in the history of this company as well as the leader of the most promising young stable of the past two years, a member of whom is now not only talented enough, but emboldened enough by my influence to carry the Curse of the Gold Card; as well as a general, all-around force for change when this company needs to be revitalised, preferably under the stewardship of new management, the choice of whom will be personally overseen by yours truly.

And what do you have, David? A forgettable Television Championship reign, a kids' replica of the Ultraviolent Championship tossed to you by Nick for being an obedient dog and a handful of losses to Chris Austin. Nice work there, champ.

A bit touchy there, aren't we?

How the picture looks has everything to do with how you paint it, Jack; I'm on my way up, whereas it feels like an eternity since you've been anything other than a holding-pattern title contender and captain of a floundering ship. Also, my voice doesn't carry a strong undertone of butthurt like yours does.

Anwyl wrote:

Anwyl: I'm just looking at some previous matches of yours right now. Now at 15.1 you were handed the Television Title and lost to Damien Inferno, good start.

15.2 Pinfall victory over Dazz Andrews *yawn* that made you look soooooo good.

15.3 Beats Smoochy Da Frog, no creditability gained there!

First elimination in the Lethal Injection Tournament, so Randy Savage there!

And then you lose your title to Jimmy Ice at 16.1!

Two wins!? That didn't do anything for your image! You look pretty soft out there son. Nothing to brag about in the last five shows. Zilch, zero, nadda! But apparently having no personality can get me a C-4 Championship match, no talent allows me to beat Skyler Striker, Alex O'Rion and Doc Derrick?! Oh yeah, what's your excuse now?!

King: You sound 12. That's being generous, but I like to give people the benefit of the doubt. Before we get started humiliating you any more, let me get one thing perfectly clear. I am not proud of my record, I don't stand by my record and at no point in time will you ever find me claiming to have had more success than you. What I do claim, among other things, is that I'm smarter than you. I'm also more eloquent than you, more exciting than you and arguably more entertaining than you. Your victory over Skyler was impressive, Doc was disappointing in his defeat and Alex O'Rion would have put up a better fight if he were dead. You got the C4 championship match simply because there was literally no one that they could have put in the match to garner any sort of interest. You profited from the company's failures and reached a level far beyond your abilities through the incompetence of management in creating legitimate stars. You reached the C4 Championship and immediately crashed and burned, without even the measly number of defenses the supposed "Living Punching Bag" achieved. As my nursemaid used to say "Make sure your own house is clean before worrying about how your neighbor does her dusting." In case you're not sure what I'm saying since you don't seem smart enough to deal in idioms, make sure you actually are better than me before you trying talking down. Your move, bitch.

Jonathon King wrote:

King: You sound 12. That's being generous, but I like to give people the benefit of the doubt. Before we get started humiliating you any more, let me get one thing perfectly clear. I am not proud of my record, I don't stand by my record and at no point in time will you ever find me claiming to have had more success than you. What I do claim, among other things, is that I'm smarter than you. I'm also more eloquent than you, more exciting than you and arguably more entertaining than you. Your victory over Skyler was impressive, Doc was disappointing in his defeat and Alex O'Rion would have put up a better fight if he were dead. You got the C4 championship match simply because there was literally no one that they could have put in the match to garner any sort of interest. You profited from the company's failures and reached a level far beyond your abilities through the incompetence of management in creating legitimate stars. You reached the C4 Championship and immediately crashed and burned, without even the measly number of defenses the supposed "Living Punching Bag" achieved. As my nursemaid used to say "Make sure your own house is clean before worrying about how your neighbor does her dusting." In case you're not sure what I'm saying since you don't seem smart enough to deal in idioms, make sure you actually are better than me before you trying talking down. Your move, bitch.

Anwyl: Immediately crashed and burned!? I see that was more of the company's fault in that situation. Full Metal Wrestling did not foresee me refusing to sign a contract extension, you can't let an out of contract star hold a title with such prestige, so they made me lose, that's how the business works every now and then. I mean seriously, what is that going to look like to the shareholders and stockholders of Full Metal Wrestling? I stepped out of the spotlight, without making a noise. I may have treated FMW unfairly, but personally I needed the break. That's why I never defended the title, that's why I didn't go for the run I should have had, at the time it was FMW's fault and now in hindsight it was a mistake on my behalf.

But what I did in my year long run in Full Metal Wrestling, was nothing short of impressive. How many people here can boast that they have climbed from the mess that is the under-card, (remember I was king of you rookie misfits) and capture gold with such prestige. So called FMW mistakes aside, why weren't you up there as a bankable star? Why didn't you take my place? I mean you're meant to be leaps and bounds better than me, why are you at the bottom of the food chain! If I was to return tomorrow, I don't doubt for one moment that I would be looking down at you from the top.

Try and be smarter than me, you've underestimated me quite a lot over the last few days and now I'm currently weighing up my options to returning to the ring, just being able to have a go at you over the last week is very tempting to return and kick the shit out of you. But, for shallow Anwyl here, it's all about the money! You have a lot, FMW has a lot. If you want to prove yourself son, I'm keen to make your pocket lighter.

David GS wrote:

Easty wrote:

David GS wrote:

It's either insulting or lying. Hell, could be both.

And Jack, you really oughta know better than to mock any piece of gold, given that right now your only claim to fame is a failed experiment of a stable.

Wind your neck in, David. I wouldn't want to have to break it.

Let's see what I've done now; one-half of the first ever FMW Tag Team Champions and the only man to contest for them singularly; a member of the most successful stable in the history of this company as well as the leader of the most promising young stable of the past two years, a member of whom is now not only talented enough, but emboldened enough by my influence to carry the Curse of the Gold Card; as well as a general, all-around force for change when this company needs to be revitalised, preferably under the stewardship of new management, the choice of whom will be personally overseen by yours truly.

And what do you have, David? A forgettable Television Championship reign, a kids' replica of the Ultraviolent Championship tossed to you by Nick for being an obedient dog and a handful of losses to Chris Austin. Nice work there, champ.

A bit touchy there, aren't we?

How the picture looks has everything to do with how you paint it, Jack; I'm on my way up, whereas it feels like an eternity since you've been anything other than a holding-pattern title contender and captain of a floundering ship. Also, my voice doesn't carry a strong undertone of butthurt like yours does.

Touchy? Not at all. You insinuated my only claim to fame was The Pack. I merely corrected you.

While it's true that to some people I may be floundering - some would say stagnating - I advise you to wait and see. Not, of course, that you will actually be able to see it, blinded as you are by your own stupid sense of accomplishment.

I, David, have actually done things in this company worth talking about. Any butthurt I may express just stems from the fact that even talking to you is a pain in the arse.

Wade Barrett totally sounds like Eastwood. True story.

That was then. This is now. And as far waiting and seeing, we've all been waiting on your merry band of misfires for quite some time now and seen relatively little. Except for that time when I picked you three apart nearly single-handedly, of course. That was fun.

Longoria wrote:

Santana: Also, Chris, almighty Full Metal Champion, you can assume all the dirrty facts you want about us, but the sad truth for you and the rest of the perverts in the locker room is this: we are not sluts. You're gonna have to buy some hookers to satisfy your ghastly chauvinistic needs because that's not how we roll.

Oh, and also, I fail to see how that foul she-beast is more attractive than, I don't know, say, the next Maxim Magazine covergirl. That's right.

Santana, I said alleged. I wouldn't give you the time of day if you or your sister were as promiscuous as people claim. As for your hookers comment... that was just not your best work. Do better in my classroom. Do you need to see me after class?

Be warned, I'm not putting out so if sordid behavior tickles your fancy I'm afraid I'm fresh out of that. But I'm sure you're not like that, right?

And finally, don't be jealous of Faith. She merely has qualities that you two do not possess thus she appeals to a different breed of man. Just be happy that you have Mr. King, Mr. Andrews, and so on.

Anwyl wrote:

Jonathon King wrote:

King: Y naou sound 12. That's being generous, but I like to give people the benefit of the doubt. Before we get started humiliating you any more, let me get one thing perfectly clear. I am not proud of my record, I don't stand by my record and at no point in time will you ever find me claiming to have had more success than you. What I do claim, among other things, is that I'm smarter than you. I'm also more eloquent than you, more exciting than you and arguably more entertaining than you. Your victory over Skyler was impressive, Doc was disappointing in his defeat and Alex O'Rion would have put up a better fight if he were dead. You got the C4 championship match simply because there was literally no one that they could have put in the match to garner any sort of interest. You profited from the company's failures and reached a level far beyond your abilities through the incompetence of management in creating legitimate stars. You reached the C4 Championship and immediately crashed and burned, without even the measly number of defenses the supposed "Living Punching Bag" achieved. As my nursemaid used to say "Make sure your own house is clean before worrying about how your neighbor does her dusting." In case you're not sure what I'm saying since you don't seem smart enough to deal in idioms, make sure you actually are better than me before you trying talking down. Your move, bitch.

Anwyl: Immediately crashed and burned!? I see that was more of the company's fault in that situation. Full Metal Wrestling did not foresee me refusing to sign a contract extension, you can't let an out of contract star hold a title with such prestige, so they made me lose, that's how the business works every now and then. I mean seriously, what is that going to look like to the shareholders and stockholders of Full Metal Wrestling? I stepped out of the spotlight, without making a noise. I may have treated FMW unfairly, but personally I needed the break. That's why I never defended the title, that's why I didn't go for the run I should have had, at the time it was FMW's fault and now in hindsight it was a mistake on my behalf.

King: Are you seriously going to pull "It's management's fault" on me? On GSW? God, we're supposed to be joke and now you're ripping off our material. I won't deny that I choked, hard, when I got here, but if you want to talk about things being managment's fault? They took a rookie and in his first match threw him against some of their top talents, then they did it again. The first match I got to wrestle against people who weren't already established stars I won my first championship. I then held the championship until interference from Deveraux and a sneak attack from a rookie bitch took me down. You beat Skyler and then quit because you were afraid of trying to actually make something of your reign.

Anwyl wrote:

Anwyl: But what I did in my year long run in Full Metal Wrestling, was nothing short of impressive. How many people here can boast that they have climbed from the mess that is the under-card, (remember I was king of you rookie misfits) and capture gold with such prestige. So called FMW mistakes aside, why weren't you up there as a bankable star? Why didn't you take my place? I mean you're meant to be leaps and bounds better than me, why are you at the bottom of the food chain! If I was to return tomorrow, I don't doubt for one moment that I would be looking down at you from the top.

King: Actually, it was quite a bit short of impressive. Literally the only thing you did worth bragging about in your tenure here was defeating Skyler, who then turned around and whupped your ass. As to how many people can blah blah blah? How about all of the ones who have ever captured a championship? I'm thinking you meant to ask a less stupid question, but were incapable of it. With that said, I'm still laughing at your little "King of the Rookies" line, since that was a self-given moniker that I challenged you for. You named yourself King and then ducked the only challenge you received, and now you're trying to use it as bragging rights? That's stupid, you're stupid, stop being stupid. Now we get to the real meat of the issue, why you're more successful than me. Once again I'll go back to the old GSW trope of managment not wanting us to succeed. Deveraux knew that I was better than you, but he can't have GSW challenging for real championships. So he looked around the roster to see someone to take MY place and settled on the Charlie Haas of FMW, you. Bland, boring, safe. Everything GSW is not, and so he gave you the push, he gave you the championship and solidified your place forever as the whiniest, most self-entitled little bitch on the roster. A very impressive acheivment with guys like me around.

Anwyl wrote:

Anwyl: Try and be smarter than me, you've underestimated me quite a lot over the last few days and now I'm currently weighing up my options to returning to the ring, just being able to have a go at you over the last week is very tempting to return and kick the shit out of you. But, for shallow Anwyl here, it's all about the money! You have a lot, FMW has a lot. If you want to prove yourself son, I'm keen to make your pocket lighter.

King: I don't have to try, I am smarter than you. If you need evidence of that, look at what you just said. You expect me to pay you to return in order to face you? Let's make a few things really clear, first, I have better things to do than face you. Second, I have literally nothing to gain from beating you, since you aren't the type to accept a loss with dignity. If you really want to shut me up, you can come back and try, but I'm certainly not paying for it.

Also, Chris, it's good to see you back in the classroom. The kids tend to misbehave when the teacher is away.

Clearly. I must apologize for my absence. No real excuse for it. I could say I was preparing for Apostasy but it's come to the point where if I don't have it by now, then I won't. Therefore I'm fully confident in my abilities to best the man on my own merits.

So, it appears that I've not missed much. Braxtons think they're still hot. Eastwood looks jealous of David's general success, and Anywl continues to badger someone about being some sort of talented, as based on winning a C-4 Heavyweight Wrestling Championship without having to beat either of it's last three champions, which consisted of the best in that championship's history, myself (the most talented champion in its history) and Christian G. Smitten, who is a bonafide hall of famer. I guess defeating Skyler Striker when he still has some ring rust is something to be proud of, given that we saw what happened when Striker had returned to some semblance of his form.

If I have missed anything, do fill me in. I don't want to be on a different page than the rest of you at this moment.