Alchemy 7.3 - RESULTS

Shelia Blige: Ladies and gentlemen, this match is a C4 Sprint match! Introducing first, weighing in at 205 pounds and from Birmingham, England, CHASE!!

Disturbed’s ‘Land of Confusion’ plays Chase down the ramp to a hearty welcome. Chase steps in between the ropes taking a long drag of his cigarette before flicking it into the crowd, and turning to await his opponent.

Stone: Good evening ladies and gentlemen! This is FMW Alchemy, and you’re joining us at our opening match, a C4 sprint match – four matches tonight, whoever can defeat their opponent fastest will win the right to face Hostyle at Catalyst!

Foxx: And this match is about to get a whole lot gayer, because it’s Chase vs. Wraith!

Shelia Blige: And his opponent, weighing in at 185 pounds and from Brooklyn, New York, WRAITH!!!

Chase doesn’t need to wait long as Rufio’s ‘Like a Prayer’ cuts off the ring announcer and heralds the arrival of the two time C-4 Champion, Wraith. He emerges from the curtain flanked by Andrew Shiner (who is holding the C-4 Title) and Dorian Gray. The boos only increase as Wraith is seen mouthing ‘I hate Northern Mexico’. Wraith motions to the C-4 Title, holding it an inch from Chase’s face, grinning, before tossing it back to Shiner. Wraith then turns to Shelia Blige and grabs the mic from her.

Wraith: Right. Here’s what’s going to happen. I’m going to make quick work of you, Chase, and I’m going to coast into my match against Hostyle at Catalyst – where I will successfully DEFEND my C4 Championship. Shelia, would you care to announce me again, please, along with my official title? We discussed this before.

Shelia looks confused, knowing Wraith is not actually the champion, but he gives her a threatening look and hands her back the mic. The crowd boo all the more towards Wraith and his entourage.

Shelia Blige: And introducing his opponent, weighing in at 185 pounds and from Brooklyn, New York, he is... the C4 Champion... Wraith?!

Blige bails to the floor as Wraith flings his shirt to the crowd and slaps Chase across the jaw.

Stone: It is ON!

Foxx: Who knew the fag had such a strong pimp hand?

Stone Chase is checking his teeth, and pausing to collect himself. He steps back and….SPITS IN WRAITH’S FACE! Thesz Press! Thesz Press! He’s raining closed fists down…

Foxx: Wraith has his guard up, trying to deflect as many of these as possible, but the referee is finally restoring order, moving between the two competitors and pulling Chase off…

Stone: Wraith uses the referee as a screen and low blows Chase! Chase just dropped to a knee as the referee was backing him off Wraith and…BAM! Showtune!

Foxx: Wraith covers and is three seconds away from undoubtedly securing a C-4 Title Shot. 1…2….KICKOUT!

Stone: Wraith shakes his head, he wanted this over and done with, and you could see it there. Dorian Gray just slid a chair into the ring, in full view of the referee. Now, Eric Shun, our senior Alchemy official is ordering Gray to the back.

Foxx: This is why you have a two man entourage. The referee is removing Gray as Shiner lobs the C-4 Title in to Wraith. Wraith charges Chase, and gets a drop toe hold face first into the belt. He’s busted wide open. Chase slides the title back to the floor as the referee re-enters the ring.

Stone: Chase hurriedly up top as Wraith is hunched over and bleeding….He’s looking for the Cigarette Burn, also trying to punch his ticket early.

Foxx: He sidestepped! Chase lands right on Wraith’s knee, atomic drop style, and crumples back into the corner. Wraith steadies himself and looks to follow with a spear, but nobody is home!

Stone: Wraith’s shoulder ate that ringpost with his shoulder, and is now in a bad way. Chase pulls him free, and drops him down hard across his knee with a shoulder breaker! Wraith rolls into the foetal position, clutching his shoulder, trying to get to his feet, but as soon as he’s up, Chase kicks him in the shoulder with a stiff shot, and Wraith falls to the floor, screaming in pain. Chase looking to bring this home under the three minute mark, but Wraith slows it down.

Foxx: Veteran move there, collect yourself and regain your focus. These two need to slow down. I get that it’s a beat the clock setting, I do, but they are both creating too many openings with such haste, and frankly they are too evenly matched to be taking these kinds of chances.

Stone: And as my partner says that, Chase leaps through the ropes with a suicide dive that crashes and burns, and Wraith gets on him like a rabid dog, slamming his back, neck and spine into that ringpost, repeatedly. He now rolls him in and slides in after him, stalking him.

Foxx: TEXTBOOK NECKBREAKER! Cover! Only 2. The referee checks on Chase, as Shiner is up on the apron undoing the far turnbuckle. Wraith scoops up Chase looking for a Powerbomb into the exposed corner…

Stone: Backslide by Chase, Wraith headbutts the steal and staggers back into the POINT FIVE OH! Wonderful German, he’s holding the Bridge!

Foxx: He’s got him! 1…2…KICKOUT!

Stone: He didn’t kickout, Shiner pulled Chase’s leg, breaking the bridge. Wraith is still dazed.

Foxx: Baseball slide by Chase on poor Andrew Shiner! He’s merely out there to learn at the knee of his mentor, and Chase has to take a cheap shot at another competitor in the C-4 Title hunt!

Stone: Chase admiring his handiwork is rolled up for two and gets free, but charges right into a flawless belly to belly. He tries to right himself, and Wraith emphatically PUNTS HIM RIGHT IN THE HEAD!

The crowd oohs, and a small chant of ‘you-just-got-yer-fuck-ing-head-kicked-in-CLAPCLAPCLAP’ erupts, to which Wraith cracks a half grin.

Foxx: Wraith ascends to the top turnbuckle, looking to end this. He’s off with a frog splash, but Chase rolled away and steps over once Wraith eats the mat! CROSSFACE! Look at the torque on that shoulder! We’re at past 4 minutes and this thing could be over!

Stone: That shoulder nailed the ringpost earlier, and now, it may be separated. He needs to tap here, or he will have had the shortest comeback in history.

Foxx: He’s looking at Shiner…no, he’s looking at the C-4 Title on the ground next to Shiner. And he gets a foot to the ropes! Chase releases as Wraith collects himself on the apron. Shiner through the ropes dove right into a knee strike to the chops! Wraith picking him up!

Stone: That was savage. Cradle DDT on the unforgiving ring apron. Chase collapses to the floor motionless as Wraith rolls back into the ring and motions for Chase to be count out, but Shiner has already rolled him back into the ring. Miscommunication there!

Foxx: Wraith shakes his head, annoyed, but follows for a cover, to no avail. Kickout!

The crowd serenades Shiner with ‘You Fucked Up’, to which Shiner doesn’t care, at all.

Stone: Chase trying to get up, to bring the fight back to Wraith here in this see saw matchup. He’s to his knees as Wraith steps up behind him… SHADES OF GRAY locked in! Potential gamebreaker right here!

Foxx: Chase is fading, but he falls backward driving Wraith into the exposed corner. Great desperation counter, as Wraith sags in the corner and Chase collects himself.

Stone: Chase follows up, Stinger Splashing Wraith against the exposed steel and bulldogging him out of the corner. 5 minutes, 30 seconds!

Foxx: Chase is ready to pull this off. Wraith is face down on the mat, bloodied and hurt. Chase is stalking his prey, ready to punch his ticket… Fujiwara Armbar…no, Wraith slipped free, and connected with a throat thrust that staggers his foe. Wraith firing back here, Jumping up…Shining Wizard! Cover! Nothing doing, only 2. He charges into Chase and gets nailed with an arm drag, but he rolls through and connects with a chop block, drop elbow to follow but Chase rolls free, Chase looks for the stomp but Wraith avoids, kick blocked by Chase, punch parried by Wraith, headbutt drops both men!

Stone: What a flurry! They both had the same thought at the same time, and closed that tremendous sequence of counters and near falls by flooring each other! Amazing. The referee has started his double 10 count, and both men are motionless.

Foxx: The referee gets to 7, now 8, but it looks like both men are getting to their feet, huge cross from Chase. Wraith answers with a kick to the midrib, Chase backs him up with a chest chop, Wraith stumbles him with a shin kick, lariat by Chase is ducked! STORMBREAKER! He hit the shit outta that one!

Stone: Wraith can’t follow with the cover though, as he instinctively threw the Stormbreaker with his left arm, which is the one that may be dislocated. He’s laying there in agony, but Chase is out! He flops backward across his downed foe! 1…2…3…NO, HE KICKED OUT at the 7:45 mark!

Foxx: He couldn’t hook the leg, and Chase, at that last possible second, kicked free. Now, in an unusual turn of events, the guy that just took the big blow of the match is in the driver’s seat. He’s taken everyone of Wraith’s closers, and Wraith is clutching his arm…Chase pulls him in, and drops him with another Shoulder Breaker! He’s going for another one, but Wraith backslides free, as the two jockey for control, Wraith gets a waistlock, pops the hips, BELLY TO BACKSUPLEX sends Chase down hard on his neck!

Stone: Both men are down again, as we’ve got to be coming to the end of this matchup.

Foxx: Wraith cinches in a front face lock on the Brit, BROADWAY EXPRESS! He’s unloading rapid fire with those knee strikes! Chase collapses down, and pulls Wraith forward by the trunks, driving him into the ringpost again!

Stone: Chase pulling the sagging Wraith free of the corner, and takes him over My with a Northern Lights Suplex. Cover, but Wraith hooks the rope at a shade over 8 minutes.

Foxx: Wraith getting manhandled here, Chase applying a cross armbreaker, locked in! Shiner up on the apron, and Chase releases the hold and low blows Shiner between the ropes! ROLLUP FROM BEHIND Wraith! Only two!

Stone: Chase gets nailed with the Knightfall, and Wraith ascends to the top. Big Elbow finds The canvas at the 9 minute mark, as Wraith drives his injured wing into the mat! Cover by Chase, Kickout!

Foxx: Frustration showing slightly for Chase as he scoops Wraith up for a powerbomb, and drives him into that exposed corner! AND AGAIN….AND A THIRD TIME! My God, the rope snapped!

The crowd erupts with ‘Holy Shit’ chants, as Chase’s repeating powerbomb on Wraith snapped the corner turnbuckle, spilling pieces of the turnbuckle fixture to the mat.

Stone: Chase drags a defeated and motionless Wraith to the middle of the ring, and looks to apply a winning cover, but Shiner pulls the referee to the floor! Chase is out cold! WHAT THE FUCK JUST HIT HIM?

Foxx: Wraith just blasted him with the bolt stanchion that the ring rope is affixed to. He’s got him busted wide open and covered! He’s out cold! The referee is now looking back in the ring and sees the pinfall! COUNT IT, REF! COUNT IT!

Stone: The Referee is in the ring motioning to Wraith, and now signalling the timekeeper! He didn’t count the pin. Did he see Wraith’s use of the foreign object?

Foxx: He’s pointing at Shiner! I think Shiner got Wraith DQ’ed! Chase may have had him, and that’s what Shiner reacted to.

Shelia Blige: The Winner of this match as a result of a disqualification is CHAAASEE!!!

Chase (8.1 aps + 1.1 avs = 9.2 total)
Wraith (8.12 aps + 1.0 avs = 9.12 total)

Stone: He’s your clubhouse leader at 9:43! Wraith just obliterated the referee and points to Shiner, angrily, who gets in the ring with a chair.

Foxx: I think the real troubling thing about this is the miscarriage of justice…The most decorated C-4 Wrestler of them all was just cheated. Ouch, Wraith brains Chase with that bolt again. He’s bleeding all over the place.

Shiner has the chair, and Wraith tells him to place it on Chase’s neck. Shiner doesn’t. Wraith stares at him mouthing ‘do it or I’ll fucking kill you’. Shiner, after hesitating, complies.

Stone: No, the troubling thing is that Wraith is calmly going up to the second turnbuckle, and he stomps the chair across Chase’s surgically repaired neck. He’s smiling at his handiwork. What a sadistic fuck. He fires that bolt and the chair into the crowd, taking a deep breath to revel in the unadulterated hatred coming from the masses. He waves to them, and then clutches his injured shoulder, pointing Shiner to the back.

Wraith pauses as Shiner shakes his head and leaves. Wraith spits right in Chase’s face and rolls to the floor, before picking up the C-4 Title. Another referee enters the ring and holds up the ‘X’ sign and Wraith begins backing his way up the ramp with a smile as EMTs and the training staff tend to Chase. At the top of the ramp, Dorian Gray, places a hand over his charge’s non injured shoulder, and Wraith mouths ‘I told him this would happen’. They kiss as the crowd boos lustily. Dorian holds up the C-4 Title and Wraith holds up his middle finger to the crowd as he departs.

Foxx: Well, that’s definitely an... interesting start to the night!

Stone: Chase holds the lead tonight, but there’s still three matches to come as well as a few Catalyst announcements! Stay tuned!

[alc]The camera cuts backstage to Action Jackson, who has decided for some reason to wear a large gold chain around his neck, along with other things that reach the extremes of 'bling'. To boot, the wall behind him has a poster of Barrack Obama making a passionate speech. A large white sign on a stick that says 'Yes We Can', written in large bold letters, lies against the poster.

Action Jackson: Ladies and gentlemen, my guest at this time – the Puh-rince of Puh-retty, Janus FLARE!

The camera pans out to reveal Flare, who stares blankly for a second at Jackson's bling, and then shakes it off, cracking his knuckles.

Action Jackson: So, Flare – are you worried about facing a former FMW and Ultraviolent Champion, as well as a Mount Vesuvius winner, in the C4 Sprint tonight?

Flare: Hah. Worried? My large, unfortunately black friend, I personally requested to face Michaels in the Sprint. I have waited so long for this moment, and now it has arrived. No, anxious, I may be, but worried, I am not.

Action Jackson: So what motive do you have in requesting to face Michaels?

Flare: Do your people understand logic? Seriously? Drew Michaels is one of the biggest fish in Alchemy's pond right now. Therefore, if I can defeat Drew and make it through to Catalyst for a C4 Championship match, I will already have defeated one of the best men in this company. And after having had so many experiences with the C4 Champion himself, that too will be another victory.

Action Jackson: So-

Flare: I am not done, you incompetent reporter. Just hand me the microphone, it will make this easier.

Jackson reluctantly hands over the mic to Flare and takes a step back.

Flare: From the moment I started my FMW career, I have wanted Drew Michaels one on one. And now that chance is here. I promised victory, and I will deliver just that: victory!

Flare holds out the mic for Jackson to take back but drops it as the interviewer goes to grab it. Flare rolls his eyes and leaves the set, and Jackson picks up his mic, brushing himself off.

Action Jackson: There you have it. Janus Flare promises victory over Drew Michaels in the C4 sprint match tonight on Alchemy![/alc]

Voiceover: Ladies and gentlemen, it's the moment you've all been waiting for – FMW's CEO Jason Roy needs a new protégé, but who will it be? Tonight, we've landed in Texas, and it's Alchemy's turn to audition for the position of heir to FMW's throne. Who will it be? Find out right now, this is JARO IDOL!!!!

A burst of annoying theme music plays and a fancy graphic scrolls along the screen, not too dissimilar to other Idol franchise opening sequences. As soon as the graphic finishes, we sweep in with a long camera shot revealing a large studio audience all cheering and waving their hands around in the air to be noticed. Various camera angles are all shown, and a few audience signs are also spotlighted - “What happened to Krow?”, “Is Celeste's old position open?”, and “I marked for Original Sin!” among them. A camera pans to the stage and the voiceover returns.

Voiceover: Introducing your host for this evening...

The crew roll a large crate out on a trolley and crowbar the back of it open so you can't see who's in there, but a distinctive 'WARK!' fills the PA as the crew take the crate away.

Voiceover: ZUZU!!!!!!

Stone: Um, hold on – wasn't Zuzu killed?

Foxx: And wasn't he an Ostrich?

Stone: Isn't that an Ostrich?

Foxx: No, it's an Emu!

Stone: Um... I guess we can call him Zuzu Mark II if we need to...

Foxx: Shhhh! He's talking!

Zuzu Mark II the emu looks nearly identical to the former Zuzu the Ostrich, but the show goes on regardless of species.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark wark wark wark! Wark wark wark. Wark wark wark... WARK WARK!!(Welcome to Jaro Idol, I'm your host, Zuzu! Tonight, we will discover who is in line to be Jaro's new protégé. And so to introduce your judges, first, to judge ring ability, the incomparable DALBY SOUND!!)

The camera pans to the judging table, and Dalby Sound walks through the crowd to take the first of three seats to a thunderous ovation.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark wark, wark wark wark, wark, WARK WARK!! (Secondly, to judge evil character, he is the most evil judge to walk the face of the Earth, as well as having prior judging experience, from Who Framed Roger Rabbit, JUDGE DOOM!!!)

Judge Doom walks down the aisle as well, receiving another round of applause as he takes his seat on the far side of Dalby.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark wark wark wark, wark wark, wark wark wark...

Foxx: Ah... of course. We should relay these off, it’ll be easier than reading the listed translation for Zuzu. This next judge bathes himself in the blood of Guatemalan children for lulz...

Stone: Buried one of the friendliest people ever – Sheepster – so much that he couldn’t be bothered showing up any more...

Foxx: Exploited his position as booked of Pyromania so he could book himself in matches he could easily win, bury the entire roster, and challenge for championships that were not even under his jurisdiction, all in a greedy quest to become the most awesome person ever...

Stone: Was denied the things you just mentioned and intentionally got himself exiled from the company in order to turn people against it and in turn bury the promotion...

Foxx: Had sex with Robb’s fiancé to win a match...

Stone: Pretended he was a haemophiliac to win a match...

Foxx: Kicked a handicapped child in the face to win a match...

Stone: Made Takeover a backstage interviewer...

Foxx: Ran over Samyi Song with a trailer...

Stone: Laughed at Morpheus when he was informed he had cancer...

Foxx: We should really bring up that cancer thing more. I think Morpheus might have forgotten he has it.

Stone: Beat Celeste on national television in front of Dante Jones’ daughter, who he legally adopted, simply because he wasn’t pleased with the way Celeste ran Alchemy...

Foxx: Forced Celeste to give him blowjobs knowing he has an STD...

Stone: Ended Phantom Lord’s career and then brought him back to FMW just to piss people off...

Foxx: Manipulated Nick Bryson into hitting his cousin with a weapon - twice...

Stone: Subjects the faces of FMW to torture on an almost show-by-show basis...

Foxx: And founded Original Sin, the most bad-ass stable of evil superstars ever, resulting in the crucifixion of Drew Michaels and Nick Bryson!

Zuzu Mark II: Wark wark wark, WARK!!! (Ladies and gentlemen, the final judge, JARO!!!)

An orchestra starts up in the background and sweeping camera angles pan onto the ramp near the judges’ table, and pyro explodes in a tremendous fashion around the whole audience. Jaro then arrives on stage, but he is in a wheelchair, and a small microphone is connected to one of the chair’s arms. His body is burnt quite badly, but the crowd are on their feet cheering. Nutjobs. Rolling up to his desk, Jaro coughs roughly and flicks a switch on the arm of his wheelchair to turn on the microphone, and a small keyboard also appears from the opposite arm. Jaro types his speech into the box.

Jaro: Welcome everyone. I-

Jaro stops as the crowd enjoy a muffled laugh. Jaro’s voice is not his own – rather it is a computer mechanized one similar to Stephen Hawking. Every word comes out monotone and some come out mispronounced, and everything he says is disjointed, but with a roll of his eyes Jaro continues typing.

Jaro: Be quiet, idiots. You just heard how evil I am. Don’t think I won’t kick any of your children in the head. This competition is designed to produce someone I can make even more evil than myself – if that’s even fucking possible. Let’s just get this show on the road.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark wark, wark wark – wark wark wark Wark Wark! (We’ll get a closer look at the judges later on. Ladies and gentlemen, the first contestant on Jaro Idol – please welcome Leon Caprice!!!)

“Far Enough” by Ra plays over the sound system as Leon Caprice makes his entrance onto the main stage. He is met with cheers from the crowd, but Jaro leans to Judge Doom in the middle and types something – although he has likely forgotten his screen reads out whatever he types.

Jaro: Who is this guy?

Judge Doom shrugs and Jaro turns back towards Caprice.

Jaro: Right. First things first – you look like a pussy, so you’ve got about a minute to prove you’re not. Unlikely, though.

Caprice looks nervous, but stutters out what he can.

Leon Caprice: Well, uh, as you probably know, I’ve only been here for a few months, and I still haven’t found a definite line to follow... it all seems so misplaced. Maybe that’s what it will take to get this chance. I don’t know. And you know I’m a, uh, Christian, but that won’t stop me from hurting others or occasionally bending the rules. But I’d probably try to do it in secret. As for an incentive to pick me... well, I still need a purpose in this place, and Christians and purpose go together like fish and water. So I think that you should, uh, pick me, and I’d thrive on that opportunity to learn from the best.

Caprice finishes his attempt, and when he looks up the crowd are applauding – however, Jaro is being roused by Judge Doom, who has to wake Jaro up from a pretend sleep.

Jaro: Oh, you’re done. Thank God – or me. Whatever works. Dalby?

Dalby Sound: The kid’s won a couple matches, but nothing more. The guys you beat were only rookies, Caprice. And while you may want to learn from the best, at the moment you’d just be wasting the best’s time.

Jaro: Judge Doom?

Judge Doom: I LIKE PETROL!

Jaro: Exactly. And besides you sucking in-ring and out, you also claim to be a Christian. Lego, or Loner, or whatever your name is, Christianity is for the weak minded. For those who have nowhere else to turn. You can pretend that God will save you if you want, but it’s a load of shit. You’re fooling yourself because you’ve got no hope – and by the looks of today, I’m not going to give it to you. Three ‘no’s. If I wanted a Christian as a protégé, I’d probably hire a nun and see if she’d put out.

Dalby looks strangely at Jaro and Judge Doom grins maniacally.

Jaro: Memo – add ‘get a blowjob from a nun’ to my list of evil things to do. Thankyou for the idea, Leon! Your assistance is appreciated. Now get the fuck off my stage.

Caprice shakes his head and is joined by Zuzu Mark II, who puts a wing over the defeated Caprice’s back.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark wark wark wark, wark wark wark, wark? (Unfortunate run there Caprice, but we do have to move on for now – any final thoughts?)

Leon Caprice: Well, I-

Zuzu Mark II: WARK!!! (DONE!!!)

With a step back, Zuzu Mark II effectively superkicks Caprice with his extra long emu leg, and Caprice collapses to the floor, unconscious.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark wark wark – wark wark! (Don’t go away – we’ll be back later on in the night!)

The camera pans out on Zuzu Mark II talking with the judges, Leon Caprice being dragged offstage by stagehands.

Stone: Welcome back folks, you’re here with Stone and Foxx at Alchemy 7.3! Where we are seconds away from starting the 2nd C-4 Sprint between Leon Caprice and Marky Mark.

Foxx: Well no offence to these rookies, but Chase set a hard time of 9:45. That means that one of these two suckers needs to lay the other out on the canvas in under 9:45. It’s going to be impossible for them. They might as well just throw in the towel.

Stone: Well Foxx, miracles do happen…

With that all attention is drawn to Shelia Blige as she lifts the microphone to her mouth.

Shelia Blige: The following match, is a C-4 Sprint, with the time to beat standing at 9:45. Introducing first….

”Far Enough” by Ra hits in the arena, causing the crowd to pop as out through the curtain walks Leon Caprice!

Shelia Blige: From Perth Australia, weighing in at 230 pounds, LEEOOONNN CAAAPRIIIIIICCCEEE!!!

The crowd continues to pop, as Leon appears, slowly walking out into the centre of the entrance with his head bowed. When the music develops Leon slowly walks to the top of the ramp where he stands still with his head bowed and feet positioned shoulder width apart. He then lifts his head and extends his fists forward and then violently retracts them with considerable momentum, while opening his mouth in anger. Then walking towards the ring observing the crowd and surroundings and when reaching the ring walking up the stairs to the left and entering the ring under the third rope. Then making his way to the furthest turnbuckle and climbing up to the second rope and tensing his arm and clenching his fists while arcing his arms to his stomach. When the crowd have been played enough, he hops down to stand in the ring waiting for his opponent to come from the back.

Stone: And here we have Leon Caprice, who has been climbing the ranks of FMW of late and of most recent times he has been placed amongst some of the top wrestlers in the business.

Foxx: Well it all doesn’t matter Stone. Because looking this kids match stats he’s only had one win and he’s been here for how long? This kid is and always will be a jobber. I can see it in his eyes.

Stone: So you’re now saying that you’ve developed an ability to read people?

Foxx: Precisely.

Stone: God help us all.

As Leon resting in one of the corners, “The Payback” by James Brown hits over the speakers, drawing excitement from the crowd.

Shelia Blige: and his opponent, from Philadelphia, PA, weighing in at 230 pounds… MAARRRKKKKYYYY MAAARRRRRKKKK!!!

Unlike Leon’s entrance, there is no nonsense from Marky Mark who just appears and begins rushing down to the ring. He springs down to the ring, sliding in with great haste and now stands in the middle of the ring waiting for the bell.

Stone: And here we have Marky Mark, another up and comer, however how will he fare after their last meeting.

Foxx: Well from what I see, Marky here has it hands down, he uses his head and doesn’t get distracted by the little things, plus he’ll be looking to give Leon some REVENGE…

Stone: That could be true, as last time these two met was at 7.1, where both men were part of a 6 man Battle Royal, in which Leon pulled out the win.

Foxx: Yeah after doing nothing, he just waited while Marky did everything and then cheaply pinned Marky, where is the reward in that.

Stone: Well that’s just wrestling for you.

Foxx: Yeah, corrupt.

Stone: And that’s coming from you.

At that point we see both wrestlers positioned in opposite corners of the ring, with Leon making the first move, taking a few steps forward and standing in the centre of the ring, now motioning for Marky to join him.

Foxx: What is he doing? Quickly Marky…the crotch, kick him in the crotch!

Stone: No it looks like Leon has called Marky to the middle to say a few words and just there is an extended hand from Leon.

As Leon extends his hand out to Marky, Marky simply looks down at it, says a few words and eventually shakes his head.

Foxx: Looks like Marky isn’t here for fun anymore, he doesn’t want to get distracted from his tactics, but still…kick him in the crotch, damnit!

At that moment, Leon lowers his hand only to lift it back up again and swiftly slap Marky in the face. In doing so the bell rings and the time on the titantron starts to count down. As Marky recoils from the slap he quickly throws two sturdy swings at Leon, however both fly over Leon as he ducks twice and then follows up with two quick jabs to the face and a backhand to the chest, knocking Marky down.

Stone: And we are off here folks, and what a way to get underway.

Foxx: Yeah, the no good praying cheater, catching Marky off guard.

Marky now slowly edges to rest against the turnbuckle as Leon stands in the centre now giving Marky some spiteful words.

Stone: Well, Marky mark’s going to have to regroup mentally now, as physically both these men are in magnificent shape, both coming into this match in as far as I know 100%, suffering from no physical ailments it should be an amazing match up.

Marky manages to regain himself and join Leon back in the centre of the ring, looking to do the same pattern again.

Stone: And there it is two more powerful swings flying over Leon’s head, but wait…

Looking back into the ring, Marky gives a strong kick to Leon’s stomach, stoping Leon’s momentum and leaving Leon stunned.

Foxx: There you go, the cheater go what he deserved. That’ll teach him

With the chance with Marky, he Irish whips Leon towards the ropes only to follow it up with a clothesline from hell, however both men think the same and connect with each other’s necks and throw each other backwards.

Foxx: Ha, looks at these guys they can’t even counter a simple clothesline, I tell yah, if I was in there…

Stone: But you’re not.

Foxx: Well if I was, they would both be feeling a bit of thunder and a bit of lightning

Stone: Your crazy.

Foxx: And so’s your face.

Stone: That doesn’t make any sense.

Foxx: And so’s your face.

Stone: ...

Inside the ring now both men are slowly getting to their feet with Marky just regaining himself before Leon. This quick amount of time gives Marky time to lay a big right hand into Leon’s head, giving Leon the jelly legs.

Stone: And it looks like Marky is going straight for the head, giving Leon multiple blows to the head and not giving Leon a chance to fight back.

Marky has now pushed Leon into a corner continuing to pummel him with fists. The crowd count up to ten with every blow, and eventually the ref pulls Marky Mark off.

Foxx: And what a brilliant strategy by Marky, not giving Leon a chance to defend himself and pushing him into a corner.

Stone: Well we will see just how brilliant it was.

Marky steps back into the centre of the ring, eyeing Leon resting in the corner and races in for a knee to the head, but Leon quickly moves out of the way and sends Marky’s knee smashing into the turnbuckle.

Stone: Good counter there by Caprice, as he now follows it up with a chop block from behind to the damaged knee.

Foxx: See, what did I say? He’s a no good cheater. He can’t attack Marky from the front!

Stone: Just let it play out, idiot. That move sets up Leon to further target that injured knee, which Marky must be feeling.

Leon now starts to kick the injured knee letting in four brutal kicks before being pushed away with Marky’s other leg allowing Marky to regain his footing and sprint back at Leon grabbing him with a Broad Street Bundle.

Foxx: It’s a roll up, he’s going for the pin!

1… 2… Kick out!

Stone: And this match is still going folks, a near fall for Marky there almost gave him the win.

Foxx: Yeah and by looking at the time he would have easily beat Chase’s time with a comfortable 4:32.

Stone: But the match is still going with both men now standing up in the centre of the ring extending their hands ready for a grapple! They’re wasting time with formalities! This is about speed!

Looking into the ring, both men now join in a powerful grapple with Leon slightly overpowering Marky, however a quick knee to the stomach gives Marky the upper hand.

Stone: And a good move there by Marky, who now plants Leon with the Right To Remain Silent!!

Foxx: Yeah that’s right, making him taste the canvas, could be it here for my boy now!

Marky quickly looks to the clock [5:32], as he now goes for the pin.

1... 2... Kick out!

Stone: Again a near fall for Marky!

Foxx: He can’t believe it! He’s asking the ref what the count got up to.

Stone: But he should be looking to put his opponent away here, time is still ticking away.

Marky pulls himself away from the ref to see Leon slowly crawling towards the ropes, Marky quickly grabs Leon’s leg and drags him back to the centre and sets up the Figure 4 Leg Lock.

Stone: And the Figure 4 Leg Lock is locked in! Leon can’t take this for too long…he’ll have to get out of this soon if he is to get back into this match in time.

Foxx: No, Marky’s got it here, Leon’s going to tap!

The pressure on the hold can be seen on Leon’s face as he eagerly looks for a way out of the hold, he eventually succeeds in rolling the hold over and placing the pressure onto Marky’s injured leg.

Stone: And what a brilliant counter by Leon there, he remembered the injured leg and reversed the hold onto it… very clever.

Foxx: Well he wouldn’t have been able to do it if it wasn’t for Marky setting the move up.

Marky now is feeling the pain, fervently trying to reach the ropes and break the hold.

Foxx: Almost there…come on Marky, reach for it.

And Marky reaches the ropes, the ref starts counting for the hold to break, Leon lets go instantly and both men slowly make their way to their feet and ready to go at it again. This time Leon looks past Marky to see the time at 7:36, realising that there isn’t much time left Leon races forward with a clothesline, which is ducked under by Marky, however upon bouncing off the ropes, Leon comes back at Marky with a running STO, laying Marky to the mat and building some momentum.

Stone: And that sends Marky down, giving Leon some time to recuperate and prepare himself to end this.

Foxx: He won’t do it in time. He’s only got a minute and a half left!

[8:15]

Leon looks back at the titan tron, then rushes past Marky with a kick to the head and starts to mount the turnbuckle.

Stone: He’s heading up, this could be risky!

Foxx: DIVING LEG DROP connects!!

Stone: Caprice now going for the pin, this could all be over!

1, 2...KICKOUT!!!

Stone: How did Marky manage to kick out of that?

Foxx: That kids got a heart, come on Marky only got to hold out for another 45 seconds.

[9:00]

Leon quickly looks up to the Full Metal tron… 40 seconds, he hurriedly raises Marky up and lifts him up in a cross above his head.

Stone: And this must be it… the TIMEWARP!!!

Leon plants Marky into the canvas and quickly goes for the pin

1 [9:13]

2 [9:14]

…3!![9:15]

Shelia Blige: And Here is your winner and the NEW C-4 Sprint leader at a time of 9:15…. LEEEOOOOONNNNN CAAAAPPPPRRRRIIICCCEEEEE!!!

Leon Caprice (8.12 aps + 1.6 avs = 9.72 total)
Marky Mark (7.9 aps + 0.5 avs = 8.4 total)

Stone: And that’s the end of this folk, this match is over!

Foxx: He only needed to survive for 30 seconds more, now this cheater is the man to beat!

Stone: That’s correct, so now for the last two C-4 Sprints the time to beat is 9:15!

In the ring now Leon Caprice can be seen atop of one of the turnbuckles, making the taunt of having the title around his waist soon.

Stone: Well Leon Caprice may have got the win here, but is 9:15 enough to solidify him a spot against Hostyle at Catalyst?

Foxx: No way, looking at what’s still to come tonight! Drew vs. Flare and Shiner vs. O’Rion. This punk is sure to be beaten by one of these four men.

Stone: But who will it be, if any? We’ll find out after this pre-taped broadcast of the Ring of Valor from the Hayabusa Cup!!!

Cherry: The following match is the RING OF VALOR match! Superstars can be eliminated via pinfall, submission, or being thrown over the top rope.

”Jet Black New Year” by Tuesday plays over the P.A. accompanied by gold streamers. T. Ekstreme makes his way down to the ring, strolling confidently with a smirk on his face.

Cherry: Introducing first, from Pensacola, Florida, weighing in at 213 pounds, T. EKSTREME!

“The Might of Rome” from the Gladiator Soundtrack replaces Ekstreme’s theme and MASS Caesar, accompanied by various servants, comes out to a chorus of boos

Cherry: Weighing in at 210 pounds, from Rome, Italy, he is the Full Metal Wrestling Television Champion, he is MASSSSSSSS CAAEEEEEEEEEESAR!

The arena darkens and strobe lights accompany R.A. The Rugged Man’s “Break The Walls Down”. Soon after, Chris Austin appears on the entrance, strutting to the ring, beating his chest.

Cherry: From San Jose, California, weighing in at 224 pounds, he is The Radical, CHRIS AUSSSSSSSTIN!

The arena remains dark and fire bursts down the sides of the ramp and comes back up as "Reborn" by Stone Sour hits the speakers. A smartly dressed Hannibal Frost makes his entrance and smugly walks down to the ring among a mixed reactions of boos and cheers.

Cherry: From Memphis, Tennessee, weighing on at 234 pounds, HANIBAAAAAAAAAL FROST!

As Frost gets into the rings, the music changes to "Croatian Rhapsody" by Maksim and Romeo Vizzini makes his way out onto the ramp. Posing for the crowd, he gets a huge pop.

Cherry: Lastly, weighing in at 240 pounds, from Sicily, Italy, this is ROMEOOOOOOO VIZZZZZINI!

The bell rings

Larsen: There’s the bell, and we’re off.

Foxx: Your mom was off last night.

Larsen: Already?

Foxx: Hell yes. Now call the match.

Larsen: Ok then. Romeo and Vizzini are squaring off in the corner trading punches in the near corner and Austin and Caesar are trying to put the other over the ropes already. Where’s our fifth man, Ekstreme?

Foxx: He’s taking a little breather in the corner. Smart man.

Larsen: He hasn’t even done anything.

Foxx: The fact remains that he’s not fighting right now, and he’s not expending any energy at all. He’s just waiting to pick up the scraps left behind by the others.

Larsen: Not too much unlike yourself.

Foxx: Bingo.

Larsen: Caesar picks up Austin and goes for a vertical suplex, but he dumps him over the outside! RCA counters and lands on the apron, big forearm shot rocks Caesar’s teeth! One of Caesar’s servants is behind him trying to pull him off of the apron, but Austin prevents that with a huge kick to the face! Facing the ring again, Austin off the ropes, Springboard Tornado DDT on Caesar!

Foxx: Meanwhile, Frost with the upper hand on Romeo, and he whips him into the corner, where Ekstreme is resting!

Larsen: Ekstreme notices, and hits a nice dropkick, right to the head of Vizzini. A little tag team work now between Frost and Ekstreme now, as Ekstreme instructs Frost to lift him up as for a backdrop, and Ekstreme hits the elevated leg drop on the prone Vizzini! Ekstreme tells Frost to do it again, and Frost responds with a boot right to the gut of Ekstreme, and he’s attempting to throw him over!

Foxx: Fight it!

Larsen: He does and Ekstreme rolls out of the ring, out from harms way, and here come Romeo Vizzini from behind! Roll-up on Frost! 1... Kickout! On the other side of the ring, Austin has Caesar in a single leg Boston Crab, and he’s really wrenching it on. Caesar reaching for the ropes but he can’t quite make it! One of his servants come around and help pull his hand towards the ropes, which he finally grabs, forcing Austin to break the hold.

Foxx: I need to get a few servants. They seem really helpful.

Larsen: Anybody who would want to wait on you would be insane.

Foxx: Then insane servants it is. Always one step ahead, Larsen.

Larsen: Vizzini going to work on Frost, hitting him with a big Fisherman’s suplex. Cover! 1... 2... Kickout! And on the other side, Caesar has the advantage on Austin, no doubt thanks to his servants once again.

Foxx: Using his surroundings to his advantage. A man after my own nature.

Larsen: Indeed. Austin on the ground and Caesar off the ropes, Praetorian Strike! Cover! 1... 2... The ref stops the count! Caesar’s feet were on the ropes! Austin still down, and Caesar up to the top rope, going for the Consul’s Call! He missed!

Foxx: No one home.

Larsen: No one indeed. Austin going for the Rated RCA, he has it locked on! And he’s too far in the center of the ring to do anything! He looks around for help, he’s not getting any! Caesar taps! The Television Champion taps!

Cherry: Ladies and Gentlemen, MASS Caesar has been eliminated!

Foxx: This is an outrage!

Larsen: This is SPARTA!

Foxx: The hell?

Larsen: I thought it was fitting. Anyways, RCA is up to help his quasi-tag team partner, who is currently being worked over by Romeo in the corner. Romeo going for a Superplex, but Frost is fighting it! Austin under the pair, Powerbomb Superplex! Austin hits the powerbomb on two men and Romeo hits the Superplex on Frost! All three men are out!

Foxx: And here’s Ekstreme in with the pinfall attempt on Romeo! 1... 2... Kickout! Now he tries Frost, and this should be it for him! 1... 2... No! Frost is too resilient for that and Ekstreme doesn’t look happy. He goes to the turnbuckle, climbs it, and goes for the Greetings from Pensacola!

Larsen: Missed!

Foxx: Gay!

Larsen: And Austin has shaken off the cobwebs and here’s a San Jose Spinal Tap attempt on Ekstreme, but he fights it! Ekstreme up to his feet, and the two trade punches now. Romeo back up, Frost up too, but just barely! Romeo picks the very groggy Frost up in a Fireman’s Carry, La Spada Siciliana! This should do it for Frost! 1... 2... 3! One-fourth of HavOc is out!

Cherry: Ladies and Gentlemen, Hannibal Frost has been eliminated!

Larsen: And we’re down to three men.

Foxx: Good, I was wondering if you were able to count to three.

Larsen: I was wondering the same thing about yourself.

Foxx: I can count to four at the very least, that was tested last night in your mom’s room.

Larsen: You’ve already tried the your mom bit, earlier.

Foxx: But it still applies here. Ekstreme with a roll-up on Austin! 1... 2... Kickout!

Larsen: That was a close one for Austin he should make sure he knows where is opponents are. I think he does, Foxx, he’s trying for another San Jose Spinal Tap on Ekstreme! He has it synched in! But the ref doesn’t see it! He’s still checking on Frost! Ekstreme taps, but the ref hasn’t turned around yet!

Foxx: And here’s Ekstreme’s prodigies from the crowd!

Larsen: The word “prodigies” is used very lightly here.

Foxx: Steve-E in now and Slegnadamus goes around to the other side of the ring. Steve-E breaks up the submission attempt and slides out as the ref turns around. The ref goes to tell Steve-E off as Slegna slides in behind Romeo! He turns Romeo 180, and lifts him up for the Psychic Vision! The Powerbomb GTS connects and Ekstreme’s there to pick up the scraps as Creative Control high-tails it out of there! He picks the lifeless Vizzini’s body and dumps him over the rope!

Cherry: Ladies and Gentlemen, Romeo Vizzini has been eliminated!

Larsen: Creative Control’s interference saved the match for one man and ended it for another. Keep in mind here that it took 3 men to eliminate Romeo. I’d take that as a compliment.

Foxx: But he lost, deal with it!

Larsen: Ekstreme taunting Romeo’s elimination and doesn’t realize that Austin has gotten up behind him! He’s stalking Ekstreme!

Foxx: Don’t turn around!

Larsen: He does! San Jose Smackdown! This is it!

Foxx: Dammit!

Larsen: Austin counting along with the ref! 1... 2... 3! He’s done it, Chris Austin has won the Ring of Valor!

Cherry: Ladies and Gentlemen, T. Ekstreme has been eliminated, therefore, the winner of the Ring of Valor is “THE RADICAL” CHRIS AUSTIN!

Chris Austin (8.43 aps + 1.2 avs = 9.63 total)
T. Ekstreme (8.28 aps + 0.8 avs = 9.08 total)
Romeo Vizzini (8.2 aps + 0.1 avs = 8.3 total)
Hannibal Frost (8.0 aps + 0.3 avs = 8.3 total)
Mass Caesar (7.93 aps + 0.3 avs = 8.23 total)

[alc]”Frontier Psychiatrist” by the Avalanches hits the speakers and Andrew Shiner makes his way to the ring, notepad and pen at hand. The crowd give him a mixed reaction, but Shiner pays no heed to them.

Foxx: It's always a joy to have someone who seeks the truth, justice, and all that non-sense to represent everything that this brand stands for.

Stone: Oh the truth? The truth that you'd be another overweight retired wrestler on the brink of another coke binge and a nasty gambling habit, teetering towards the edge of a self-inflicted cardiac arrest?

Foxx: Just as much truth as your San Diego Chargers blowing like a swamp duck ho with razor blade teeth.

Stone:...I hate Norv Turner.

Foxx: And I hate you. Now shut up and let the man speak.

A hush befalls the crowd as the Take 5 set; a leather chase lounge next to a matching recliner in the middle of a now velvet drenched ring features Shiner seated at its epicenter with mic in hand. With a monotonous, cavalier drawl, Andrew speaks tonelessly, though every eye in the arena is focused on him.

Shiner: Another edition of Take 5 commences now. The guest tonight is a focal point of the "new" Alchemy. Claims to be a crusader for justice, yet uses questionable means to accomplish it. Also a known associate of the Sicilian Mafia; family and rank not on file. Leader de facto of the Silver Pistols - Romeo Vizzini.

The crowd gets to its feet to contented greet one of their favourites as "Croatian Rhapsody” by Maksim roars over the swelling applause from the fans. Soon after, Romeo makes his way down the aisle, dressed not to compete but in a lovely three piece suit ensemble made from presumably expensive Italian tailors. Slapping fives with some of the younger audience member, Romeo makes his way to the ring, dipping beneath the second rope and gives a merry wave before seating himself adjacent from Shiner.

Foxx: Oh God. Someone get this bad Tony Soprano knock-off off our television screen. In fact, that would probably be more entertaining than watching this kid in action. If the screen just suddenly went black. At least with the shoddy production of our camera crew, our fans would get what they're paying for. Not for bad stereotypes and hypocrites.

Stone: Regardless of my partner's egregious hate mongering...

Foxx: Ooo. It's clear Hooked on Phonics: Hood Edition has worked for this porch monkey. Want a banana?

Stone: ...Our fans are very invested in the story of Romeo Vizzini. I do believe the young man's heart is in the right place, Foxx. He's just wanting to bring back a bit of order to all the chaos in the locker room.

Foxx: The road to hell was paved with the best of intentions. But let's see what the little lying, violent bastard has to say for himself.

Romeo's entrance theme fades into the growing cheers to which he smiles in response to politely, seating himself and brandishing a microphone in hand.

Romeo: Grazie grazie. Ciao or hello rather, it's good to be here tonight.

Shiner: Irrelevant. Let's get down to business. Fared well in the Mount Vesuvius Match until X and St. Michael Dreamkiller made an appearance. Eliminated yourself. Some see that as stupid..crazy even. Explain?

Romeo: Your rudeness non-withstanding, Shiner, I'd be happy to oblige and account for my actions. You see, this all started at Anarchy 6.3 when X and that bastardo Dreamkiller collectively screwed me out of the Television Title. Since then, it's been nothing but a maddening downward spiral. You could say it is the one injustice that I haven't rectified and it's been eating a hole inside of me. My actions at Circus Maximus were only that justice coming to a head. I was right in trying to take X out. He's done nothing but continue to prove a menace to the order of this company.

A smattering of applause and agreement comes from the crowd. As soon as it dissipates, Shiner continues with his line of questioning.

Shiner: Who appointed you our protector? Are we not capable of defending ourselves?

Romeo: Dreamkiller and men like him did. Men who found themselves beyond the virtues of decency, honor, and respect. In principle, this is what the Resistance was founded upon. And it was for that very reason I was invited to join their cabal. In the beginning, they stood against the injustices that were perpetuated by Original Sin. In theory, the Resistance was exactly what FMW needed to keep it a float...or so I originally thought.

Shiner: Thought? Clarify.

Romeo: When X and Dreamkiller separated, I had thought that X had finally seen the light. That he had finally broken free from Dreamkiller's oppressive hold over him. Even so, it took my by surprise when the Resistance so readily allowed for him to defend the company and the interests of the people. It was odd. It was like..

Shiner: Like you were shoved aside. Rendered useless. Impotent.

Romeo: Not exactly the colorful vocabulary I would use but si. I guess you could say that I felt sleighed and even a little jealous that the Resistance didn't trust me enough to hold the maxims of the group. But they trust some abhorrent, mindless beast that may or may not have reformed to aid them in the dismantling of a bloated and overly proliferated Original Sin. Something was amiss and I smelled a rat.

Shiner: Interesting. Footage from the match indicates your instincts were no mere paranoia. Alex O'Rion turned his back on his "friends". Left them to fend for themselves.

Romeo: It didn't really surprise me to be honest. O'Rion is the type of unstable personality that would do something to that affect. You see, I looked at the Resistance as mi famiglia; with family, comes loyalty. You don't betray the loyalty of that circle. And it had happened to him so often, it was only a matter of time before he blew a gasket.

Shiner: Noted. Your thoughts on RAMPAGE! - real name Dante Jones?

Romeo: When I first heard that 'Page was going to be the General Manager, I was thrilled. If anyone understood the bond that family has, it was him. He did everything humanly possible to protect what was most sacred to him. I saw Dante as a more than a friend; I saw him as a like-minded individual and that all wrongs would soon be righted.

Shiner: Leading to your confrontation with St. Michael Dreamkiller.

Romeo: It was so vindicating to get my hands on him by that time. That was more than justice; THAT was punishment. I was finally at ease with myself when he hadn't been seen since then. I had finally felt as though Dreamkiller had got what was coming to him.

The crowd agrees vehemently with Vizzini. Shiner, ever cool and neutral, returns to his journal that he scribbles in religiously. The camera pans behind him to find an illegible cipher that would take even the most keen of minds to comprehend. Adjusting his fedora and the lapels of his coat, Shiner continues pressing issues.

Shiner: So it must have come as a surprise to you when X was removed from the Mount Vesuvius match.

Romeo: Was that a statement or a question?

Shiner: Statement. Care to illuminate on it with opinion?

Romeo: Well yes. It did surprise me. I was a bit confused by the move. The structure of the Mount Vesuvius, as any of its participants can attest to, is demonic. It not only shortens your career but it shortens your life. In my mind, I questioned what this was accomplishing. X had been good enough to represent FMW and defend its honor. But he isn't good enough to participate in a match that could earn him the most prestigious title in our company? That didn't make sense. So then I wondered if this was some sort of punishment directed towards Dreamkiller. Again, it didn't fit. Why would that hurt Dreamkiller if his mule was denied an equal share of glory on his own terms? Wouldn't that be proving Dreamkiller right? That X was his creation and only functioned if he willed it so?

Shiner: So did what any rationally sane, marginally coherent human being would do; you confronted management on its decision. You questioned the authority.

Romeo: What choice was I left with? I approached RAMPAGE! and asked him what was up with him. But recently..he's been more..I guess confrontational than ever. What's worse is that he's secluded himself from having private audiences with his talent off camera.

Shiner: Perhaps they has gotten to him?

Romeo: What do you mean by "they"?

Shiner: The powers that be. Mainly, St. Michael Dreamkiller.

Romeo: Your implying that RAMPAGE!, Dante Jones, was in deep with Dreamkiller?

At this, Romeo has to chuckle.

Romeo: That's..definitely one way of explaining it. And the least likely.

Shiner: Note that regardless of RAMPAGE!'s decree pertaining to Circus Maximus and X was not heeded. If the general manager was so concerned about X and Dreamkiller, he would have made a better effort of barring them from the arena. Jones is far from a poor man and, once more, has a corporate spending account. It isn't too far of a reach for one to afford armed security to patrol the arena premises.

Romeo: Yes but..

Shiner: Also; X and Dreamkiller came to screw you at Circus Maximus. This there is no disputing. Though there was no immediate punishment or reprimand for the actions perpetrated against you. Simple question - why? Where was Jones' zeal and valor after this incident? Where was his fairness, his rants on equality and change?

Romeo, as well as the crowd, are at a loss to find the words to explain this. However slowly, he comes out of this self-imposed catatonic state, his facial expressions changing along with his state of mind. He proceeds, however cautiously, stirring and switching his posture as to indicate agitation.

Romeo: ...RAMPAGE! is doing the best he can with what he can. Like me, he made a choice. Our choices are not always based on what's logical or what's common sense. Sometimes, we have to go with a gut feeling. Taking myself out of Mount Vesuvius wasn't my brightest moment but if I had another chance, I'd do it again and again. Not because its what's right for me in terms of wealth or fame but because its what's right for my soul long term. Whatever RAMPAGE!'s reasons were for not providing more preventative measures to ensure that neither X nor Dreamkiller stuck their nose in my affairs, I..I'm sure he would say the same thing.

Shiner: Hesitation. Increased exasperation. Seem unsure of yourself. How well do you know Dante Jones? How can you assume what his motives are, what really causes him to tick? How can you be absolutely what you see is what you get?

Romeo: It..it's just that back when Original Sin was around, you knew who was right and who was wrong. Terms of "good" and "evil" were so much more distinct back then. We were the good guys, they were the bad guys. But as the War began to run its course, right and wrong threw themselves out the window. I was looking around me and seeing good, decent, honest men doing dishonest, horrid things..

Shiner: Naive. Childish notion of good and evil.

Romeo, at this, stands up, causing a murmur of excitement to tremor through the crowd. Vizzini is visibly growing more aggravated by the second. Calmly, Shiner gets to his feet, with Romeo closing the distance between them.

Romeo: Vaffancuo te cagna! You wouldn't have the balls to stand up to Original Sin like we did..

Shiner: Assuming you even know who "we" are. Why are you so sure that Dante Jones wasn't in league with the organization known as Original Sin? He has said himself that he is property of Full Metal Wrestling and, by proxy, Jason Roy. What is preventing you from seeing what's right in front of your face? Blinded by faith and admiration to see what's already there.

Romeo quickly lashes out at Shiner, grabbing him by the lapels of his coat which causes the crowd to go into a frenzy of approval.

Stone: This situation is thick with tension..

Foxx: But Shiner has a valid point, Stone; this blind loyalty and code of honor that Romeo expects everyone else to follow hasn't helped him thus far. Just what exactly do we know about Dante Jones? Just what beneath that tough, burnt, rubbery exterior is he hiding exactly?

Stone: I can't exactly speak for RAMPAGE! but I think that Romeo is making a mistake by letting Shiner get under his skin like this.

Romeo, calming himself, releases his grip of Shiner who remains still during this exchange.

Romeo: Le mie scuse. I allowed for my emotions to get the better of me.

Shiner: Understandable. When the ego is questioned or threaten, an equal and opposite response is warranted. I would've defended myself if it came down to it. You didn't answer my question?

Romeo:...This interview is over.

Shiner: The truth is you cannot handle that someone you trusted or had faith in had betrayed your loyalty. That you made a mistake in trusting Dante Jones in doing what's right. In never compromising under any circumstance. Even the most simple of minds can be brought to a simple conclusion; Dante Jones is now a part of the conspiracy.

Romeo: Oh great...baseless paranoia.

Shiner: Is it paranoia that removed you from your dream of headlining Ultimatum? No. It was irrefutable, unbiased truth. The truth that Dante Jones appears to be colluding with the likes of not just X but Dreamkiller himself. Let us examine the facts; mysteriously, after failing Jaro miserably, Jones was awarded custody of his child. Under circumstances that cannot be truly explained, Dreamkiller was in line to return as Anarchy General Manager with Jones acting as the sole emissary and avatar of the Board of Directors. A Board of Directors that cannot be reached for comment to confirm nor deny that Dreamkiller was indeed their initial choice to run the day to day operations of the Anarchy brand. This same unreachable, faceless wise man's council that cannot explain a phantom telephone call directing the production team to inform Jones that Dreamkiller had been replaced by Celeste. The same Board of Directors that has done nothing to find the whereabouts of two of their missing, contracted talent that are well rested, well connected, and well motivated to do all that they can to destroy you personally.

The crowd boos at this impassioned diatribe from the likes of Shiner. Romeo himself, however, subsides back into a catatonic state. Sensing weakness, Shiner moves in for the killing blow.

Shiner: Asking yourself if you made a mistake is, again, irrelevant. Obvious though it is, there is a choice one must make. Again, the iron fist of authority must be questioned. As a journalist and fellow seeker of the truth, it's your duty and honor to uphold the-

Shiner is cut off as Romeo quickly takes a quick swing at him to which Shiner ducks under and rolls away from, not seeking a conflict with a frustrated, confused Romeo. Vizzini himself begins to trash the makeshift set, taking Shiner's expensive monitor and center piece and pushing it to the arena floor, causing a shower of sparks and chip sets.

Stone: It appears that Shiner has pushed one too many buttons and cause Vizzini to snap!

Foxx: The real question is what is what is Vizzini going to do once he gets his hands on either Shiner or, worse yet, our "fearless leader" RAMPAGE!?

A seething Vizzini is seen kicking about ferns and various other props as the scene fades to commercial.[/alc]

Stone: Next on the card is the first not to be part of the sprint.

Foxx: Making it not as important.

Stone: Every match on our card is important, especially when three rookies hit the arena for our upcoming match.

Foxx: Whatever helps you sleep at night Steiner.

Stone: I’m not Jewish idiot.

Foxx: So why were you -

Suddenly “Stranglehold” by Ted Nugent blares across the PA system and Stephen Meyers walks straight to the ring and rolls in, not having anything to do with the mixed crowd reaction.

Cherry: Introducing first, weighing in at pounds, STEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEPHEN MEYYYYERS!!!!!

Foxx: This man -

Foxx is once again cut off as the PA system blares again now playing “Mr. Jack” by System of a Down blares and out walks a groggy Jack Eastwood who slaps the fans hands lazily as he makes his way to the ring yawning as he gets into the ring.

Cherry: Next up is MR JACK! Weighing in at 280 pounds, hailing from Blackpool, England. He is “The System”, he is JACK EAAAAAAAAAAAAAASTWOOD!!!!!!!!!!!

Stone: Looks like someone got no sleep.

Foxx: Yeah, your -

The PA blares once again.

Foxx: Fuck this!

Foxx flings his headset onto the announce table as “Gold Metal” by Dale Oliver and Tha Trademarc takes over the arena. Smoke begins to pour from the entrance way as the music takes a hold of the crowd, they start booing loudly only to be drained out by the flashes of blue, white and red pyro. Then through the smoke sprints Corky Angle.

Cherry: Last out is your “Special Olympic Gold Medallist”, weighing in at 220 pounds, hailing from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. He is CORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRKYY ANGLE.

Stone: That’s it match has started! Meyers and Eastwood lock up and Angle leans against the ropes as the others throw lefts and rights around like they are playing marbles.

Foxx: Lame.

Stone: Good input. Eastwood gets Meyers into the corner, Meyers eats turnbuckle. I can tell you from experience that, that padding does nothing to help. Meyers gets a side order of turnbuckle to go with the main meal! Time for dessert? NO! Meyers gets his hands up Eastwood tries to add pressure to drop Meyers head! Meyers hits an elbow! Followed by a twostep shoulder tackle! Foxx I’m almost out of breath, talk for God’s sake!

Foxx: Don’t want to be cut off by the freaking PA system again. And it’s Jehovah to you.

Stone: Not Jewish!

Foxx: How anti-Semitic of you.

Meyers and Eastwood have again started trading blows with one another, when Corky Angle decides to finally get involved and hit’s a double clothesline to take both his opponents down. Both men are on the ground as Corky Angle leaps up high delivering a knee to each temple of his opponents.

Stone: Vicious attack by Angle.

Foxx: He needs to be careful if he keeps this up he may have some competition for the next Olympics.

Stone: Special Olympics. Angle locks in a rear chin lock on Eastwood, drags him towards the middle of the ring.

Foxx: Eastwood is getting choked! Meyers slides in knee first into the back of Angle!

Stone: Meyers gets Angle in an abdominal stretch! Angle doesn’t let go!

Foxx: What the hell!? It’s like a threesome! The bad kind!

Stone: Bit of S & M to boot.

Foxx: Well people from Blackpool always have homosexual tendencies and don’t get me started on hillbillies.

Meyers has ripped Angle’s grip on Eastwood free, Angle falling backwards onto Meyers who grip gets even tighter.

Foxx: What is Eastwood doing? If Angle taps he loses.

Stone: True, yet Mr. Jack is catching his breath while Angle is fading fast.

Angle reaches out as his hand quivers inches above the mat. Seeing this Eastwood lays a boot into the face of Meyers causing him to break the hold, Angle rolls out of the ring while Eastwood stomps a mudhole into the chest of Meyers.

Stone: Angle rolls out of harm’s way, Eastwood helps Meyers to his feet! Northern Lights suplex!

Foxx: Rolling Northern Lights suplex!

Stone: Eastwood lets go. Angle back in the ring as Eastwood goes for the cover!

Eastwood places his forearm into the face of Meyers as Angle grabs his ankle and puts him in an ankle lock.

Foxx: Same name same move. But one is a special athlete, the other was an idiot.

Stone: Stop rambling Foxx, Meyers is off the mat! He heads to Angle who still has the ankle lock locked in.

Foxx: Repetition is awesome, Meyers is putting his head between Angle’s legs!

As Foxx described Meyers puts his head through Corky Angle’s legs and lifts him up into a Cyclone Suplex, Angle doesn’t let go of Eastwood’s ankle until half way through the move, as soon as Angle lets go Eastwood grabs his ankle in pain.

Foxx: Ouch, now ladies and gentleman, that is what we call hyper extension.

Stone: Eastwood has rolled to safety, as Meyers pins Angle.

1...

2...

Foxx: REF YOU IDIOT! FOOT ON ROPE!!

Stone: Exactly

Foxx: Ref sore it so we continue on this match, you know do be a ref you need to have your eyes check?

Stone: Setting up a horrible joke? Meyers helps Angle to his feet draws his fist back! Countered! European Uppercut! Angle regains control!

Angle follows up with an Irish whip into the ring ropes, then gets low and drives his shoulder into the gut of Meyers taking him off his feet.

Foxx: You wrecked my set up Stone! Eastwood is prowling around the ring pretending to limp, his acting is worse than -

Stone: NO LAME JOKES! Angle has started stomping on the chest of Meyers, the sheer brutality of all this! Driving his heel into the sternum! The crowd is not happy!

The crowd begin to boo loudly the ones closer to Eastwood plea with him to enter the ring and save Meyers, Angle has gotten on his knees and laying fists into the ribcage of Meyers. Eastwood shakes his sore leg and leaps into the ring the crowd roar in anticipation.

Stone: Eastwood with the save!

Foxx: What would you call that move, Stone?

Stone: A slam your body as hard as you can into a mongrel?

Foxx: So a Slybahauciam?

Stone: Yes, Foxx, that’s exactly what it is. All men down in the ring.

Foxx: So, Stone…

Stone: Yes Foxx?

Foxx: How’s your wife?

Stone: What are you doing?

Foxx: Making small talk, while the men are down in the ring.

Stone: Yeah she is O-

Foxx: And Eastwood is up.

Stone: Well played, Angle up as well! Eastwood attacks! Angle Belly to Belly suplex! Eastwood’s eagerness played into the hands of Angle! Angle makes another move on Eastwood!

Foxx: Pumphandle Slam! No wonder Angle won gold what a showing of strength! Angle heads over for the pin. Meyers gingerly approaches Angle!

Stone: Angle swings around just in time and shoves Meyers! Spins him around!

Foxx: PARAPELEGIC!

Stone: He has it now!

Foxx: Gold for Angle! COUNT IT WITH ME STONE!

1...

2...

3!!!

Foxx: Angle wins!

Corky Angle (6.74 aps + 2.2 avs = 8.94 total)
Jack Eastwood (0.0 aps + 0.0 avs = 0.0 total)
Stephan Meyers (0.0 aps + 0.0 avs = 0.0 total)

Eastwood comes over to shake hands with Angle who obliges and as Eastwood turns to head out of the ring Angle hit’s the Paraplegic, as “Gold Metal” by Dale Oliver and Tha Trademarc takes over the arena draining out the chorus of boos once again.

Cherry: Here is your winner! Wait… what?

Angle is signally and telling Cherry to shut her trap and hand over the microphone. She refuses so Angle steps out and forcefully pulls it from her grasp. He then calmly climbs back into the ring.

Corky Angle: CUT THE MUSIC! Yes I won. Should I jump for joy?

Crowd: What?

Corky Angle: Should I buy a new mansion?

Crowd: What?

Corky Angle: Should I buy thousands of shares? Even with the economic struggle, because they will go up, the thing with finance is if it goes down it goes up. Long time investment you know.
Foxx: Huh?

Corky Angle: No! I beat two nobodies, two men who struggle to tie up their shoe laces in the morning. So right here, right now! I make a demand, a demand for justice. For you, the viewer.

The crowd boo loudly.

Corky Angle: If I don’t get some competition around here I will seek and I shall find it. By Force. I have a special Olympics Gold Medal, I am your Special Olympics Gold Medal. The thing is I seek gold more than they did in ‘49. My music again, Maestro.

“Gold Metal” by Dale Oliver and Tha Trademarc plays one more time as Corky Angle leaves the ring his opponents still feel the effects from the Paraplegic. [/quote]

[alc]The scene opens in RAMPAGE!'s office backstage, where RAMPAGE! himself is trying to solve a rubix cube in between watching matches. A loud crash is heard as Romeo Vizzini barges into the room, furious.

Romeo: Did you see that interview with Shiner, Jones?

RAMPAGE!: Naturally, bruh. I have the whole show on this beautiful plasma screen, kindly donated from the Original Sin locker room from Lethal Injection. And before you ask, I'm going to have to deny any rumours that Shiner's throwing your way about me. I've got nothing to do with X and Dreamkiller, and even if I was, I wouldn't keep it a secret. That's not how I roll.

Romeo: You'd better not be lying, signor Jones. Because if I find out that Shiner's telling the truth, I'll have your head on a Silver Pistol platter.

RAMPAGE!: Hot-headed today, aren't we, my Italian bruh? Naw, here's the scoop. I think I know what you really want. You want a chance to prove yourself. Hell, you'd probly forget how to wrestle if you weren't proving yourself to someone. But when you can't get the job done, you start crying out for revenge on the stars you think have apparently 'wronged' you. I think you just enjoy coming up with excuses for your own shortcomings.

Romeo looks even more furious, and he slams his hands on RAMPAGE!'s desk, but Dante continues before Romeo can speak.

RAMPAGE!: Listen here. I'm going to book you for 7.4 in a match where there will be no excuse for failure. I heard you talking about having your fate in someone else's hands. Well this time, fate will be in chance's hands. The one, single, ticking hand of the Wheel of Misfortune.

Romeo's eyes perk up at this news. RAMPAGE! smiles, standing up and looking Romeo eye to eye.

RAMPAGE!: At 7.4, your fate lies with the Wheel. You're facing Skyler Striker for the Abandoned Championship. His first defence, if I'm not mistaken. If you think you can make him showstop the title, here's your opportunity. Do something different, make an impact. Be remembered. This is your consolation prize for being eliminated from Mount Vesuvius via interference.

Romeo: If you're trying to win me over by handing out title shots, signor, you will not gain my trust. I credit you for trying to put together the pieces of the puzzle Original Sin left.

Romeo turns and exits the room, but faces RAMPAGE! one last time, spreading his arms out across the hallway, motioning distance.

Romeo: But you have a long way to go, signor. A very, very long way.

With that, Romeo leaves the camera's view, and RAMPAGE! merely smiles before turning back to his television screen to watch whatever is coming up next.[/alc]

The Jaro Idol logo flashes on screen again as we return to the studio. As usual, Zuzu Mark II is ready to announce the next participants, dressed in his tuxedo.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark wark, wark! (Jaro, any thoughts?)

Jaro’s reply is also the same as before – a monotone version of his usual voice, typed in on a keyboard on his wheelchair. Sitting in the middle of Judge Doom and Dalby Sound, the camera shows a view of all three – almost identical to American Idol.

Jaro: I can only hope the next contestant isn’t as lame as the first one.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark wark, wark, WARK WARK WARK WARK!!!!!!!! (Ladies and gentlemen, the next contestant on Jaro Idol, please welcome DREW MICHAELS!!!!!!!!)

The crowd are in shock as Drew Michaels hits the stage. Jaro spits his coffee all over Dalby’s face, and Judge Doom laughs at this. Even Zuzu Mark II is in shock. The crowd don’t cheer, allowing only the sounds of Michaels’ theme music to play in the background. The camera plays up his arrival and eventually Drew makes it to the middle of the stage, waiting expectantly.

Jaro: NEXT!

Drew Michaels: But-

Jaro: NEXT!

Drew Michaels: Listen, I-

Jaro: What do you not get about NEXT, Jesus McMichaels?

Drew Michaels: Oh, shut your mouth for once! I know you can teach me a thing or two!

Jaro: I-

Drew Michaels: You could teach me how to be nothing more than a threatening bag of hot air?

Jaro: This is my-

Drew Michaels: Or how to manipulate other people into doing things for me instead of doing it myself?

Jaro: Listen, this-

Drew Michaels: Or how to hold the entire company in my hands and then royally screw it up, in turn pretty much losing any form of power I had?

Jaro: Original Sin was-

Drew Michaels: Or! How to run a competition no-one is interested in because no-one in this company wants to actually be remotely like you?

Jaro: Oh, will you shut the FUCK up? If you don’t close your mouth I swear I will shit down it.

Jaro’s voice still comes out in monotone, meaning his insults are threats are not quite as potent as usual, but Drew hushes for a few seconds, having had his fun.

Jaro: Above every other person in this company, Michaels, YOU are the one person I despise the most. More than ANYONE else. If you were right, and there was a God, you would have died in a fire a long fucking time ago. There’s your proof that God doesn’t exist. I wouldn’t pick you to be my protégé if you were the last person on the face of the earth, Michaels. Get the fuck off of my stage.

Drew Michaels: Uh, actually, I fully intend to audition, Jason! I’m quite serious. What are you going to do? Run me down with your wheelchair? I’m sure I’d have to run at maybe three miles an hour to get away from that thing!

The crowd laugh and Jaro looks around, furious. Unfortunately, as Drew is right, there is nothing Jaro can do to stop Drew from auditioning, and Drew continues.

Drew Michaels: I’m going to say something that may shock even you. Some claim that the acts a man commits are what make him evil. Well, if that is the case then my life is a to do list of villainy. I have lied to, stolen from, and assaulted others simply to further my own personal goals with no regard to those I may harm in the process. I have stolen from corporations like Public Enemy Incorporated simply because I could, even though my actions could have endangered many jobs of innocent people – again, to further my own goals. I have lied through my teeth in order to further myself in the world, and I’ve never looked back at the untruths I have told with even an ounce of regret. And of course, I have made a career out of trying to permanently maim and injure others simply because we may have had some sort of disagreement in the past. And there is the constant fact I once killed a man for no reason but I could.

Drew looks quite serious. Judge Doom and Dalby Sound look intently upon Michaels, although Jaro has somehow managed to obtain a pair of comedy ‘open eyes’ glasses that now rest upon the bridge of his nose.

Drew Michaels: I tell myself it was a mistake; I tell myself I would not do these things again. However, I know deep within my soul I would do it without a thought just like I did then. I’ve looked to God for forgiveness but I know truly it will never come because I am not sorry. In fact, sometimes, I think about it too much. I forget the pain I felt afterwards due to the mistaken identity of the victim, but instead remember all too well the rush I felt as I took a life. Many religions believe in a cyclical nature in our world, that you must both give and take from the world to be a balanced human being. I have given much to the world - at least I like to think so - and sometimes I wonder if I should again take away; if I should give in to the primal urge we all feel and revert to my natural animalistic fate.

Looking earnestly up at the judges and the shocked audience, Drew finishes his speech with emotion.

Drew Michaels: Am I evil? I want so much for the answer to be no… But I fear so much the answer cannot be anything but yes.

The crowd applaud, and Drew stands still, solemn as ever. Judge Doom rustles Jaro, and takes the glasses off him.

Jaro: Well, well. There may be hope for you yet.

The crowd seem stunned at Jaro’s approval, and Dalby looks over Judge Doom to speak.

Dalby Sound: Are you serious? You’re going to consider Drew Michaels?

Jaro: Of course not. Get the fuck off my stage. Drew Michaels, protégé of Jaro. Hah.

Drew Michaels: I didn’t come here to win a competition, you stupid bastard. I came here to prove a point. That deep down, all of us here in this federation are just like you, Jaro. Even those like me. We’re all sick, and twisted. Deranged, corrupt. Morally bankrupt, alone, and greedy for more. Isolated. Destructive. In the heart, that’s what we all are. But where those like you choose to act on it, some of us fight on for what’s actually half decent. For what’s moral. For something other than ourselves. For a better way to live than your fallen one.

Jaro stifles a laugh and instead types ‘Ha ha ha’.

Jaro: The day I conform to your Care Bare crap is the day I’m in my cold grave.

Drew Michaels: If you continue, Jason, that day is probably not that far off.

Michaels takes one last look at Jaro and leaves the stage. The audience give a mixed reaction, unsure of whether to cheer or boo Michaels, but Jaro crosses a box off of his paper with some difficulty, his arm still burnt.

Jaro: I hate that guy.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark wark WARK! Wark wark, wark! (Well, more interesting developments to come, but Jaro is still in top evil form! Stick around for more very shortly!)

Stone: Ladies and Gentlemen and Foxx, we are back! With the C-4 sprint going on we are up to the third match. Chase set a time of 9:45, which Leon Caprice beat with a time of 9:15.

Foxx: Which he got from cheating!

Stone: Foxx, shut up. Caprice won fair and square. So we introduce the third match. Alex O’rion. Andrew Shiner.

Foxx: Veteran vs. Rookie. Wrestler vs. Journalist. Do you think Shiner will bring out his note pad to the ring?

Stone: What did I say about talking Foxx?

Foxx: I am not your -

The sounds of coconuts banging each other comes across the P.A. system as “Frontier Psychiatrist” by The Avalanches takes over the system. Andrew Shiner is located via a spotlight in the crowd, where Shiner has somehow managed to appear in a seat. He pulls the cigarette out of his mouth and walks to the ring through the crowd, entering calmly.

Cherry: Introducing first, weighing in at 220 pounds, from Parts Unknown, he is ANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNDREW SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIINE-ARGH!!!!

The crowd continues to boo, and as the boos dies down the music switches to “The Pretender” by The Foo Fighters, a blue strobe light slowly flickers with the slowness of the song as the song kicks into speed blue strobes illuminate the entire arena, including Alex O’Rion who stands at the top of the ramp and walks down soaking in all the boos from the crowd. He walks down and steps into the ring calmly, he looks straight into the Shiner’s eyes and then throws his sunglasses at him.

Cherry: Introducing second, weighing in tonight 240 pounds hailing from Halifax, NOOOOVA SCOTIAAAAAA, self proclaimed and given title of the Judas of FMW, he is ANNNNNNNDREWWW OOOOOOOOOOOOO’RION!!

The crowd boos louder than ever.

Cherry: This is a C-4 Sprint match. To become the number one contender the winner must gain a pinfall, submission or count out victory before the time expires. The time to beat is set at 9:15 by Leon Caprice.

The crowd cheer at the name of Caprice as the clock on the METALtron flicks over to nine minutes and fifteen seconds.

Foxx: OK, so we have two C-4 sprint matches done with. Both matches had a new time, what are the chances this match will follow suit.

Stone: In a scripted company it would, but this is FMW not some shitty b-grade wrestling promotional.

Foxx: True we are also have non-stop action.

Stone: It’s wrestling not porn.

Shiner and O’Rion lock up in the middle of the ring, with O’Rion taking the upper hand and pushing Shiner into the corner with O’Rion releasing quickly and back tracking into the centre of the ring.

Stone: Odd tactics being used by O’Rion usually being the dirty player he is he will give a couple of quick jabs in the corner.

Shiner approaches a ready O’Rion with fists clenched as he approaches within touching distance O’Rion gives him a slap and retreats across the ring with a wide smirk.

Foxx: Haha, this is why I like O’Rion.

Stone: Alex you’re racing against the clock!

Shiner shakes his head in disgust and approaches O’Rion once more, only to receive another slap.

Stone: A minute gone and the only offense we have had is two slaps!

Foxx: O’Rion is getting in his opponents head,

Stone: He is laughing, he doesn’t care about this match, nor the C-4 title.

Andrew Shiner even more pissed off approaches O’Rion once again who goes to strike with a slap, but Shiner delivers a stiff kick to the knee, grabs O’Rion in a headlock, hooks his arm.

Foxx: Spinning reverse STO!

Stone: A quick cover by Shiner! 1...! Kickout! Too early for a pinfall.

Shiner picks up O’Rion who rakes the eyes of Shiner. Shiner falls back into the ring ropes grabbing his eyes while O’Rion just laughs and lumbers his way over to Shiner.

Stone: Capitalise Alex, CAPITALISE!

Foxx: Why? He has plenty of time. It’s only been a minute and a half.

Stone: The time set is nothing, you need to make a time that no one will beat, that is the true aim of a sprint.

Shiner goes on the attack again and delivers stiff punches to O’Rion’s head, O’Rion returns the favour.

Stone: The pair are throwing haymakers like its spring time in cattle country.

Foxx: I thought we had a strict “No Lame Jokes” policy? O’Rion grabs Shiner’s trunks, SNAP SUPLEX!

Stone: He rolls over tries again! Shiner puts his concrete shoes on! No lift from O’Rion. Shiner gets him up! Waterwheel Drop! O’Rion on the mat! Cover.

1..

2...

Th- Kickout!

Stone: Shiner can’t believe it gets up to argue with the referee!

Foxx: O’Rion has easily gotten up, and he is laughing!

Stone: He is truly a bastard, he teased Shiner with that count! Time on the clock reads two minutes and thirty seconds.

O’Rion grabs Shiner and throws him into the ring rope then follows up with a quick flapjack. O’Rion then grabs either arm of Shiner and delivers a sickening curb stomp.

Foxx: O’Rion is being vicious here, and it is taking its toll, two hits to Shiner’s head and the kid would be more loony than he was before.

Stone: Maybe it’s a cycle, and Shiner will be normal now!

Foxx: Or you can call the play by play!

Stone: Yeah when you have O’Rion laying knees into the ribs of Shiner on the mat, there isn’t much to call.

Foxx: Well the viewers didn’t know that til now.

Stone: Shut up Foxx. O’Rion stops attacking a downed Shiner and walks back to lean on the ring ropes. And he is trying to talk to the camera man, what … an … idiot!

Shiner attacks O’Rion with a forearm and gives a kick to O’Rion as he tumbles over the apron and hit’s the apron on his way to the floor.

Foxx: Shiner is left standing alone in the ring while the ref starts the count.

1..

2..

3...

4...

Stone: Don’t tell me O’Rion is going for a count out.

7...

8...

9...

Stone: O’Rion is making a mockery of this Sprint of this booking! He purposely is refusing to participate in this match.

Foxx: O’Rion will get another shot, if Shiner doesn’t win he will go under the radar.

Shiner is frustrated and shows it by kicking O’Rion as he climbs in the ring, but the referee pushes him back once more. O’Rion gets back to his feet and Shiner attacks once more, which O’Rion easily side steps and hit’s a cutter on Shiner.

Foxx: The eagerness of Shiner just got him a cutter in reward.

Stone: He is allowing O’Rion to get into his head.

Foxx: Wait! What’s O’Rion doing!? “Rip Tide”! “RIP TIDE!”

Stone: And in the middle of the ring! This is a very uncommon finishing move by O’Rion maybe he wants to win this one! Clock is at 4:30!

Foxx: Shiner going to tap?

Stone: Time is ticking away!

Foxx: Arm is out raised!

Stone: He is going to tap! It’s only been five minutes! O’Rion will have the top spot with one match to remain!

Suddenly while Shiner has his hand inches above the mat O’Rion releases his hold.

Stone: WHAT?!

Foxx: O’Rion was just weakening him.

Stone: He was going to tap!

Foxx: Or was he?

Stone: YES!!

O’Rion picks up Shiner and then hits Russian Leg Sweep, putting Shiner on the floor.

Stone: Now, O’Rion doesn’t even go for the pin, he just laughs.

Foxx: O’Rion is a kind man he helps Shiner to his feet. Shiner with a knee to the gut! DDT!

Stone: Now its Shiner’s turn for a submission hold! Locks in a half Boston crab!

Foxx: On the right leg!

Stone: Wait… Foxx you just gave some constructive feedback. Taking the right leg out from O’Rion means that dreaded “O’Rion Pride”.

Foxx: That’s why I said it, don’t treat me like I’m an idiot.

Stone: Stop acting like one! O’Rion is trapped just off centre of the middle of the ring,

Foxx: Shiner is leaning back, he wants O’Rion to be in pain.

Stone: And why not, O’Rion has been treating this Sprint like it’s a game.

Foxx: Five and a half minutes gone!

Stone: O’Rion has given up reaching the ropes and is trying to wiggle his way out of harm’s way.

What Stone says is true, O’Rion is now trying to roll over and shove Shiner off, after trying so hard he eventually shoves Shiner off.

Foxx: O’Rion gets up shakily.

Stone: And Shiner heads straight to the right leg, drop kick just above the knee!

Foxx: Shiner picks up O’Rion! WIDOWS PEAK!

Stone: O’Rion crashes down on both knees!

Foxx: Isn’t the Widow’s Peak a chicks move?

Stone: No, just popularised by a chick.

Foxx: Same diff.

Stone: Shiner heads to the top rope!

Foxx: A brawler is desperate if he heads there.

Stone: Or he wishes to punish O’Rion.

As the clock ticks over to six minutes Andrew Shiner leaps from the top turnbuckle a hits an elbow drop on the right hamstring of O’Rion.

Stone: Shiner rolls O’Rion over, cover!

One…

Tw-Kickout!

Foxx: Match goes on, Shiner is pissed off, he just kicked to ring rope in anger!

Stone: O’Rion has crawled over! School boy roll up!

One…

Two..

Thr-Kickout!

Stone: Woah! Nearly got the easy pinfall! Shiner bounces up furious, as O’Rion helps himself up using the ring ropes.

Foxx: Shiner stalks O’Rion, stiff punch to the guts! Grabs hold, SPINE-BUSTAHHH!

Stone: Shiner runs off to the opposite ring rope, bounces, running knee to the temple!

Foxx: O’Rion knocked clear from the ring.

The referee begins to start counting, at five seconds though Shiner hops out of the ring and throws O’Rion into the steel steps, then rolls him back into the ring. Shiner quickly follows, the referee stops the new count at six seconds.

Stone: Shiner gets onto of O’Rion to start punching his face!

Foxx: Wait! Shiner thrown off! How’d he do that?

Stone: Shiner is grabbing his crotch so I’m guessing a low blow would be to blame.

O’Rion gets himself up while Shiner uses the ropes to get up. O’Rion doesn’t approach Shiner he just waits until Shiner approaches him.

Stone: Shiner approaches. SLAP! O’Rion slaps Shiner again!

Foxx: Shiner pulls a full 180!

Stone: Pendulum Backbreaker!

Foxx: O’Rion goes for the pin!

One..

Two…

Stone: Shiner reaches and grabs the ring rope! This rookie has quite a wrestling brain.

O’Rion picks up Shiner and slams him on his back, then reaches down and picks him up once again.

Foxx: European uppercut! Shiner falls back into the ropes as we hit the six minute mark. Only three more minutes until we call this match a useless one.

Stone: O’Rion whips Shiner into the turnbuckle! He puts Shiner on the top of the turnbuckle! We all know what this means!

Foxx: Is it a bird is it a plane?

Stone: NO! It’s a SUPERPLEX!

Foxx: O’Rion didn’t seem to lift with his knees probably there, both men are down and out!

Stone: The superplex is a desperate move, it’s a long way to fall onto your back.

Foxx: Referee has a count going.

1...

2...

3...

4...

5...

Stone: O’Rion up.

6...

7...

Stone: Shiner on one knee.

8...

9...

Stone: Shiner up!

Foxx: O’Rion on the attack!

Stone: Shiner slaps him! Follows it up with an arm drag!

Foxx: Turn the other cheek eh?

O’Rion attacks again and Shiner counters it into a belly to belly suplex.

Foxx: Man, it’s been a suplex fest tonight.

Stone: Two brawlers in the ring, they will toss each other about!

Shiner picks up O’Rion and attempts another suplex which O’Rion counters into a float over DDT.

Stone: What a show of agility by O’Rion!

Foxx: Starting to like the guy now?

Stone: Hey, it’s rare for a brawler to do that.

The clock has just hit seven minutes and O’Rion again refuses to make the pin and instead asks the referee to start a ten count.

1..

2...

3...

Stone: Shiner would have been pinned, up to a five count and Shiner gets to his feet.

Foxx: O’Rion notices and goes for a flying cross body! SHINER HIT’S THE MAT!

Stone: O’Rion flies over and bounces into the ring post!

Shiner drags the body of O’Rion into the middle of the ring and starts to stamp on every bone on O’Rion’s body.

Foxx: The arm bone is connected to the shoulder bone.

Stone: Shiner picking O’Rion apart, in fact he is being downright dangerous.

Foxx: The referee is telling him to back off before he injures O’Rion, what the fuck! Will you do that in an UV match?!

Stone: This isn’t a UV match Foxx, the aim here isn’t to maim your opponent for life.

Shiner has picked up O’Rion who once again rakes the eyes of Shiner who turns his back on O’Rion, who then hit’s a neck breaker on to his knee.

Stone: O’Rion drags Shiner into the middle of the ring! Bounces of the ropes! HIGH KNEE!

Foxx: Hit’s nothing but mat! Shiner got out of the way and gets up!

Stone: O’Rion straight up! The pair are trading blows! Shiner Whips O’Rion into the corner!

Foxx: O’Rion ducks the clothesline!

Stone: Bounces back attempts one of his own!

Foxx: Shiner ducks! O’Rion attempts once more!

As O’Rion attempts a second clothesline so does Shiner and both connect at the same time sending both to the mat!

Stone: Shiner crawls over at the 7:15 mark and attempts the pin.

1..

2..

Foxx: Kickout at two!

Stone: Shiner locks in the “Verbal Beatdown” he is verbally abusing O’Rion as he does.

Foxx: For those unaware the “Verbal Beatdown” is an arm triangle move.

Stone: O’Rion fading fast!

Foxx: If he taps the clock will read seven minutes and fifteen seconds. New leader of the sprint.

Stone: Shiner is inches away from O’Rion’s face.

Foxx: It’s make out close.

Stone: No homo? O’Rion headhunts Shiner! The hold is still going! Another! AND ANOTHER!

Shiner breaks the hold after three head butts which knocks him to the floor and O’Rion collapses backwards clearly feeling the effects of head butting someone three times.

Stone: Shiner up first, O’Rion quickly up! Lock up in the middle of the ring! Shiner overpowers into the corner!

Foxx: O’Rion in the corner, Shiner gets onto the rope and lays rights into O’Rion’s head!

Stone: O’Rion shoves Shiner off! SPEAR!

Foxx: Bone crunching spear there! Caught Shiner totally off guard!

Stone: And O’Rion laughs as he looks at the clock as it ticks over to eight minutes.

Foxx: Leon Caprice the cheater will be licking his lips right now.

Stone: Shiner up once again and he approaches O’Rion. O’Rion moves out of the way!

Foxx: O’Rion is leading Shiner around the ring like he is a dog.

Stone: Fight Alex, FIGHT!

Shiner attacks viciously but O’Rion ducks around and hit’s a forearm across the back of Shiner who falls to his knees.

Foxx: Ohh no, it’s the dreaded chin lock!

Stone: Shiner has none of it and pulls O’Rion over his head! Locks in a bow and arrow hold!

Foxx: Shiner doesn’t think that is enough and lets go of the submission!

Stone: He helps him up! Snap Suplex by Shiner! Rolls over! A snap Suplex with a bridge!

One…

Two..

Thr- Kickout!

Stone: O’Rion used every ounce of his being to kick out there!

Shiner picks O’Rion up once again and delivers a pump handle slam.

Foxx: Another pin!

One..

Two…

Kickout!

Shiner now heads to the ring ropes setting up a “Shiner Wizard” but as O’Rion gets to his feet the siren sounds and the clock fades from the tron, in response to this O’Rion rolls out of the mat and heads up the ramp.

Stone: Leon Caprice remains number one contender with one match to go!

Foxx: O’Rion is laughing at Shiner as he gets counted out.

1...

2...

3...

4...

5...

Stone: IT’S DREW MICHAELS! IT’S DREW MICHAELS!

Foxx: What the hell?!?!

Stone: MICHAELS RUNS DOWN THE RAMP AND THROWS O’RION INTO THE RING! SHINER SPRINGS! “SHINER WIZARD!”

One!

Two!

Three!

Cherry: Here is your winner, ANNNNNNNNDREW SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINE-RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

Andrew Shiner (7.98 aps + 1.9 avs = 9.88 total)
Alex O'Rion (7.8 aps - 0.4 penalty + 0.0 avs = 7.4 total)

“Frontier Physiatrist” by The Avalanches blares across the P.A. as Shiner hops out of the ring with an incredibly angry demeanour and brushes past Drew Michaels. Michaels and O’Rion stare daggers at each other, O’Rion clearly not concerned with Shiner at all. O’Rion makes every effort to get his hands on Michaels, but the referee is holding him back.

Stone: O’Rion and Michaels take their relationship further, Michaels doing the right thing by Shiner and attacked a cowardly O’Rion.

Foxx: Fuck! I hate Drew Michaels!

Stone: Well, with only one match to go, Leon Caprice is leading the charge as #1 contender to the C4 Championship! Only Drew Michaels and Flare can overtake that record, but we’ll have to wait and see!

[alc]The camera goes backstage to a limousine pulling up in the parking lot. The crowd cheer as the door opens to reveal Spectre standing there, suit and tie.

Action Jackson: Yo! Spectre! Hold on!

From off camera, Action Jackson yells out, running to catch up with Spectre’s arrival. He finally makes it onto the camera view, panting away as Spectre wipes some dust off of Jackson’s black suit, shaking his head.

Action Jackson: Mister... Mr. Spectre, sir! I apologize for being so late!

Spectre: No need to apologize, Jackson. Not yet, anyway.

Action Jackson: So, if I can ask you a question or two?

Spectre: Of course.

Action Jackson: What the fuck are you doing in Full Metal Wrestling?

Spectre smiles and lightly shuts the limousine door behind him.

Spectre: I am simply observing what I have heard to be the best federation in the world – both wrestling and entertainment wise. I was very satisfied with my private viewing of Circus Maximus. However, I am still merely here to watch. I have heard many good things about Full Metal. I am hoping it lives up to my high expectations, Jackson. Although if we are judging simply on your choice of brand name for suits, I am already disappointed.

Action Jackson: I get paid an interviewer’s salary, man! I mean, Sir!

Spectre: if your job is done, I’d like to get out and watch some more of the show, Jackson. Thankyou.

Jackson steps aside as Spectre strides down the hallway, leaving the interviewer befuddled.[/alc]

Stone: Welcome back to Alchemy, ladies and gentlemen, and next up looks to be a good display of unified, free-flowing teamwork.

Foxx: Sucking dick?

Stone: Nope, that’s your job.

Foxx: Fucker.

”Devour” by Shinedown plays on the PA system as red lights flood the arena. Kieran Halycon emerges from behind the curtain and walks down the ramp.

Shelia Blige: The following match is scheduled for one fall, and is a six-man tag match! Introducing first, from New York City, weighing two hundred and ten pounds, he is the Blade, KIERAAAAAN… HALYCOOOONNN!!!

Stone: You heard Shelia, folks, it’s a six-man tag match.

Foxx: Three up-and-coming young guns from Alchemy versus the Silver Pussies.

Stone: The Silver Pistols have an edge here, Foxx – they’re an official team, their opponents aren’t.

Foxx: Their opponents are individually skilled enough to beat this technically newly-formed team.

Stone: We’ll see.

”Crowbar” by the Lasting Dose replaces Halycon’s theme song as FMW’s resident pothead Trey Spruance arrives on the scene.

Shelia Blige: And his partner, from Eureka, California, weighing two hundred twenty pounds, this is… TREYYYY SPRUUUUUANCE!!!

Foxx: Trey is one of FMW’s most dangerous men, no doubt about that.

Stone: I don’t disagree with that at all, but lately he’s been on a slump.

Foxx: I agree he’s either hit or miss, but when he’s hit, man, he hits hard.

Stone: Oh, definitely.

”Critical Acclaim” by Avenged Sevenfold plays as debuting Alchemy superstar Killswitch emerges from the back to a huge chorus of boos.

Shelia Blige: And the last member of their team, from Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, weighing two hundred and ten pounds, this… is… KIIIIIILLSWITCH!!!

Stone: And everyone hates on the Canadian.

Foxx: They just don’t know talent when they see it.

Stone: Are you saying you don’t hate him because he’s Canadian?

Foxx: Well, I didn’t say it, but yes, that’s right.

Stone: Chyeah, you’ll hate on a Canadian if he’s a good guy.

Foxx: Right-o.

Red lights and silver pyro burst in a grand display as Bullet for My Valentine’s “Scream Aim Fire” plays and the live crowd erupt in a huge pop as Pearson, McCart and James, the Silver Pistols, come out and make their way down to the ring.

Shelia Blige: And their opponents, at a combined weight of six hundred and seventy-five pounds, based on Manhattan, New York, this is Travis “Revolver” McCart, Michael James, and Robert Pearson – the SILVEEERRRRR PISTOOOOOLS!!!

Stone: Here come the Silver Pistols and everyone absolutely loves them.

Foxx: Overrated!

Stone: No one’s rated them yet, Foxx, they’re an up-and-coming group founded by Romeo Vizzini, and I’m sure they’ll flourish under his leadership.

Foxx: Romeo? The king of flukes? They’re not gonna get anywhere with him!

Stone: You’re just saying that, Foxx, I still maintain that the Pistols are at least a tighter unit than Kieran, Trey and Killswitch.

Foxx: And I still say they’re individually good enough to own the Pistols.

Stone: Well, let’s get down to the ring and let the action unfold.

The two teams huddle in their separate corners. The discussion over at the Pistols corner seems to be going smoothly while the discussion over at the other team’s corner seems to be heated as each of them doesn’t want to go first. Eventually, Killswitch is pushed to the front as Travis heads out from the corner as the starter.

Stone: Looks like Travis is starting out for the Pistols and Killswitch for his team.

Foxx: Don’t they have a name? It’s kind of awkward referring to them as “the other team” or “his team”.

Stone: They don’t. It’s just a one-time thing.

Foxx: Fine, fair enough.

The bell rings as the two men circle each other. Revolver charges forward but Killswitch takes a step back, trying to avoid Revolver’s clutches. Killswitch tries to get back to his corner, trying to force the tag but as he wastes time doing this, Revolver catches him and nails a back suplex.

Stone: Killswitch tried to get to his teammates but Revolver forced himself in just in time!

Foxx: Killswitch shouldn’t be made to take first blood like this! Trey should’ve started the match for them!

Stone: No dice, Switch is the rookie, or so their logic goes.

Foxx: Now that brute McCart is pounding on Killswitch!

Stone: Revolver McCart pounds on Killswitch with rights and lefts – speaking of, have you seen the Lesnar-Couture fight?

Foxx: Mixed martial arts is for lowlifes.

Stone: Well, what Revolver’s doing now is how Lesnar won the fight. Now he’s got him up and he’s taking Killswitch to their corner, and he tags in Pearson. Revolver has Switch up in a spinebuster hold and Pearson brings him down with a reverse DDT! That’s teamwork right there!

Foxx: Teamwork? More like ganging up on a defenceless man!

Stone: It’s to be expected in a match like this Foxx, get over yourself. Pearson now sending rights and lefts to Killswitch and there’s the dropkick onto the turnbuckle! Kieran takes advantage and makes the blind tag!

Foxx: I don’t think that runt Pearson’s aware of it, though!

Stone: Kieran Halycon goes up on top of the ropes and dives with an arm extended for the flying clothesline but Pearson ducks it and nails a neckbreaker!

Foxx: Damnit!

Stone: The Pistols just plain outplaying the other team right now – this was the teamwork I was talking about and it’s clearly showing right now. The edge is an edge after all.

Foxx: The Pistols aren’t afraid to resort to cheap tactics, like the number they did on Killswitch a while back!

Stone: The other team would do it if they had the chance and you’d have an orgasm for it!

Foxx: Lies!

Stone: Shush, now Pearson’s tagging in James, who’s now trading fists with Kieran Halycon, now James whips Halycon to the ropes and uses the additional momentum for that reverse STO! The Pistols are ON FIRE!

Foxx: Good god man, get a hold of yourself!

Stone: I’m sorry, Foxx, quick, fast-paced action like this just gets my adrenaline pumping along with the rest of them!

Foxx: Now that barbarian James is stomping on Kieran’s defenceless body!

Stone: Michael James runs to the ropes and comes back into a leg drop Hogan style but Kieran rolls out of the way, gets up and gives him a clothesline! And he runs back to their corner and tags in Trey!

Foxx: Trey should be dangerous right now! Dangerous!

Stone: James meets him in action as they trade fists, and James whips him to the Pistols corner and follows it up with a deadly-looking stinger splash!

Foxx: Damnit!

Stone: Trey’s gonna feel that in the morning, no doubt about that, and James tags Revolver back in and Revolver tells Mike to knock Trey out as Revolver goes up the turnbuckle! What does he have in mind here?

Foxx: Whatever it is, I hope he fails!

Stone: Trey is down, Revolver takes a minute to pause… and he flies! Shooting star press! …Wait!

Revolver lands on Trey all right, but barely as Revolver over jumps and his head lands hard on the mat and whiplashed.

Stone: Holy shit, Revolver’s head landed pretty hard on the mat!

Foxx: He just killed himself! …Should I feel guilty?

Stone: It doesn’t matter now, Revolver’s not moving! The ref’s coming to check it out!

Foxx: Is he… dead?

Stone: I hope to God he isn’t!

Foxx: Just incapacitated?

Stone: Fuck off, Foxx… the ref’s throwing up the X! Revolver is injured! His career may be over tonight! The EMTs are out here and they’re loading him onto a stretcher while the other Pistols help out!

Foxx: So… is the match over?

Stone: I’m not sure, the ref goes to consult with James and Pearson…

Foxx: End the match! End it!

Stone: They’ve come to a decision, and now the ref’s going over to Cherry… let’s hear the decision…

Shelia Blige: Ladies and gentlemen, the Silver Pistols have chosen to continue the match!

James starts out for the Pistols and Kieran starts out for his team.

Stone: So the match goes on but now it’s a two on three handicap. Michael James for the Pistols and Kieran Halycon for his team as they descend into a brawl, lefts and rights and lefts and rights, and James ducks a fist and goes behind for a German suplex!

Foxx: Come on, they should be able to win it now, they’re one man more!

Stone: Kieran goes back to his corner and tags in Killswitch again, who seems to be more confident now that the Pistols are down to two.

Foxx: He should be.

Stone: But Mike proves him wrong as he catches him in a quick and effortless DDT!

Foxx: Damn damn damnit!

Stone: Mike brings Switch over to their corner and tags in Pearson who raises Switch in a suplex and Mike jumps to hit a plancha! More teamwork!

Foxx: And I think the other two can’t handle it, as Kieran and Trey are coming from out of the woodwork!

Stone: Luckily the Pistols think on their feet as Pearson and James take them on – kicks to their guts, Pearson nails a double underhook piledriver on Trey – he calls that No Mercy – and James nails a similar double underhook facebuster on Kieran!

Foxx: This is totally unfair!

Stone: There’s nothing unfair about being one step ahead of your opponent!

Foxx: Well, only Killswitch can save this match now! Get him, Switch!

Stone: But Pearson turns around and sees Killswitch, kicks him in the gut, and nails a hard-looking half-nelson facebuster! Prison Break!

Foxx: No!

Stone: There’s the pin! The ref counts! One, two, three, it’s over, put that in the books!

Shelia Blige: And here is your winner, THE SILVERRR PISTOOOLS!!!

Revolver McCart, Michael James, and Robert Pearson (0.0 aps + 7.78 aps + 7.84 aps - 0.1 penalty + 2.1 avs = 17.62 total)
Trey Spruance, Kieran Halycon, and Killswitch (0.0 aps + 0.0 aps + 0.0 aps + 0.0 avs = 0.0 total)

Stone: Romeo is no doubt proud of his friends and protégés here tonight, but the injury of their ally Travis McCart casts a dark shade over this victory.

Foxx: I think he deserved to be injured.

Stone: Oh, shut up, Foxx. Let’s take a look at it on replay.

The screen replays Revolver’s shooting star press attempt in slow motion.

Stone: Revolver didn’t miss. He got all of it on Trey. He just overshot a little bit, his head hit the canvas a little too hard and it whiplashed.

Foxx: It was a stupid move. Stupid. He shouldn’t have done it.

Stone: I don’t know… it would’ve been effective. He’s lean enough to pull the move off, he just made a mistake. Pride does come before the fall.

Foxx: Look where it got him now.

Stone: I hope his career isn’t over, he’s just so young.

Foxx: Whatever. I personally don’t care for him.

Stone: Of course you don’t. You’re a horrible person.

The shot returns from commercial much to delight of the fans as the camera pans the Jaro Idol stage and panel booth. Finally sliding into the shot, the audience is greeted by the site of the three judges and the host of Jaro Idol Zuzu Mark II who collectively gain a mixed but healthy reaction from the crowd. The camera focuses on Jaro himself who is booed without mercy from the rowdy Dallas, Texas crowd. Jaro himself seems oblivious, inattentive, or in a pain killer induced stupor as his stage hands attend to his every whim while he rests comfortably bound by wheel chair. Using what little motor skills he retains, Jaro drums his fingers impatiently but soon recoils, wincing in agony as an excited Zuzu Mark II appears at his side, brandishing a microphone somehow even though he has no arms.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark wark wark! Wark, wark wark... wark. Wark wark, wark... (Welcome back to Jaro Idol folks. As you know, I’m your host, Zuzu Mark II! Next to me is our not-so-esteemed panel of judges consisting of founder, former CEO, and disgraced dictator of FMW Jaro...)

The crowd responds with venomous spite to which causes a vein pulsating in Jaro’s temple to twitch agitatedly. He leans forward to speak into the electronic voice synthesizer that aides his damaged vocal cords.

Jaro: A big hardy fuck you to you too, Dallas.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark wark, wark wark wark wark... (You guys will have to forgive Jaro for joining in on the auto-tuner fad that seems to be taking the world by storm. Never mind that he sounds like he inhaled a pack of Malbaro Reds every day of his natural born life or a crossbreed between T-Pain and Johnny No. 5…)

Jaro: lolololol ur fired if you don’t start a quick turnaround, Zuzu Mark II. And by quick turnaround, I mean that if I don’t start liking what I hear, you’re going to end up in the same can of pet food as the first Zuzu. Understand?

Taken aback by this, Zuzu Mark II uses his long leg to adjust his collar, then quickly puts said leg around his infirm employer who, for all intents and purposes, dies a little on the inside upon physical contact. Zuzu Mark II, if he could show emotion, would probably be feigning a thrilled excitement.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark wark, wark wark wark, wark – wark wark! Wark wark, wark wark wark? (Erm. As I was going to say, one of the most decorated and honored champions in the history of the squared circle as well as being one of the most dastardly, cunning, bold, and handsomest performers of our time. It is Jaro himself, who lately has been more recluse then Michael Jackson at an all boys’ ranch, who initiated this search to find a heir apparent to his throne built on sex, lies, and rock n’roll. Jaro, the nation is wondering how the search for that special talent is going?)

Jaro: Well picture this. If I had to choose between one of these imbeciles and using a power drill to pierce the tip of my urethra, the power drill would win out.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark wark. Wark? (Ah. I see. And anything else?)

Jaro: If you don’t take your leg off of me, I’ll rip it out of its socket and sodomize you with it, you fucking bird.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark wark, wark wark. (Hard to buy those kind of threats when you’re in a wheel chair.)

Jaro: Then I’ll lift my crippled, invalid legs and shove them up your ass. I might find a third Zuzu up there while I’m at it – maybe a dodo or something. At least something that doesn’t smell so damn Australian.

Zuzu Mark II retracts, scratching the ground.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark, wark! (That, sir, is a low blow!)

Jaro: Life’s a bitch and then you die. Speed this process along, Sound. I’m late for my sponge bath from Nurse Cherrywood. She’s going to give the ol’ undercarriage some work.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark? (Huh?)

Jaro: She’s going to polish my rod.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark? (Wha-?)

Jaro: She’s going to give me brain.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark? (Who?)

Jaro: SHE’S GOING TO SUCK MY COCK!

At this, Zuzu Mark II opens his beak wide, understanding dawning upon him. This is soon followed by an involuntary shudder of disgust as the image of Jaro’s wrinkled testes pops into the bird’s mind.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark wark, wark wark. Wark, wark wark, wark wark! (Now that I’ve given my therapist a whole new level of psychosis to explore, let us introduce you two the rest of judge’s panel for reference. Here we have the esteemed Dalby Sound, former Full Metal superstar and Alchemy participant, who failed many times to achieve his goal of winning the C4 Championship.)

Dalby Sound: Oh, give it a goddamn rest, bird. I might just come back and sock you one for that.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark wark? (Sock me like you did Hostyle?)

Dalby Sound: One warning. That’s all I give. It can’t be that hard to put a bird in an iTap.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark. Wark wark? Wark wark. (Onto our next judge…you’re kidding me right? Judge Doom from Who Framed Rodger Rabbit Fame [now available at FMWshop.com]? )

Judge Doom ticks nervously, getting a spattering and modest applause from the Dallas audience. Scratching and clawing himself incessantly, he nods feebly to an utterly confused Zuzu Mark II. However, the tormented Judge Doom bleats excitedly, his large eyes protruding from his skull with a sudden proclamation.

Judge Doom: COTTON CANDY!

Zuzu Mark II: Wark wark, wark? Wark wark? (Where did you pick up this guy? Better question…isn’t Christopher Lloyd dead yet?)

Jaro: Unfortunately, no. And apparently he’s still making movies.

Zuzu Mark II: ...Wark. (…God help us all.)

The high-pitched wail of Doom’s voice suddenly pierces the thinly veiled disgust of Zuzu Mark II’s commentary, causing Jaro’s head to slump into his plush pillow that supported his neck brace and Dalby Sound to clutch his ears in agony. Zuzu Mark II ducks his head beneath the judge’s table to avoid having his eardrums blown out.

Judge Doom: I like think that..like…every contestant who tried like…really hard should be commended for their like…commitment and dedication to the craft of glass blowing.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark wark? Wark? (Uh Judge Doom? Sir? Your honor?)

Judge Doom: Yes dear Miriam?

Zuzu Mark II: Wark. Wark wark. (This is a wrestling show. Not a glass blowing boutique.)

Judge Doom: PLEASE DON’T TOUCH ME IN MY NO-NO PLACE!

Dalby Sound: This shit’s fucked up.

Jaro: I must agree with you. This fucker is absolutely nuts. And strangely, it’s fitting that I can’t find a heir amongst all this madness.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark WARK wark WARK? (Is there ANYTHING relevant that ANY judge wants to say as it pertains to the competition?)

Jaro: What competition? I’ve finally given up hope for this generation. None of these cock-bites have what it takes to consider themselves truly worth being my spiritual successor. They don’t have the balls to sniff coke off of an AIDS infested whore’s cunt. Or the gumption to stomp a pregnant woman in her uterus using screw on metal cleats. The fine art of villainy is lost amongst these sheep who couldn’t tie their own shoes if not for my help. The rotten bastards kill the passion out even the most nubile, barely legal slut that would be willing to lick the fungusy film off of one’s taint. It takes the fun out of watching little children cry when their heroes fail miserably.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark... wark. (That’s….so depressing.)

Jaro: So is not being able to scratch my nuts being bound to this fucking wheelchair twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. But you don’t see me complaining.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark, wark. (Actually, that’s exactly what you’re doing.)

Jaro: …Shut up. Someone inform Sniper Team Alpha that should Zuzu Mark II speak within the next couple of minutes, they are given a go to execute him with extreme prejudice.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark. (You’re just joking.)

Jaro: Try me. You! You there! Come here!

Jaro rams his electric powered wheelchair into the judge’s table several times in a seemingly random direction. However, the direction the wheel chair is being rammed in happens to fall on a very generic looking, tweedy stagehand who is harassed by acne albeit being over the age of thirty-five. Buck toothed, flamed hair, and cursed with large bifocals, the stagehand makes his way over to Jaro after a moment of confusion.

Stagehand #1: Hello there.

Jaro: How much do you get paid?

Stagehand #1: 9.75 an hour.

Jaro: In euros or $CAD?

Stagehand #1: Neither. $USD.

Jaro: That’s..inhumane.

Stagehand #1: Oh, well, it’s not that bad. We still get great dental and health benefits. My kid’s getting braces because of the great coverage. There’s no need to get riled up on my behalf.

Jaro: Riled up? Whatever for? Inhumane is how I like. As for those benefits?…consider those revoked. Including your kid’s braces with a pair of pliers unless you answer me these few questions.

Stagehand #1: Sir, as desperate as you might be, I’d make a terrible protégé.

Jaro: Why do you say that?

Stagehand #1: For one, I wet the bed.

Jaro: Tragically funny and useful information for later but hardly pertinent.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark. (Quite.)

A sudden whizzing of wind blows past Zuzu Mark II's head and with an audible THUMP, another equally disposal stagehand falls to the ground with a bullet wound clean through his chest. Writhing in pain, the stagehand clutches at the wound like a mother would its only child. Zuzu Mark II himself laughs nervously while the other judges peer out from the cover they have assumed beneath the panel table. Jaro himself looks pleased at another person's anguish.

Jaro: That was a warning shot. Next one is to kill. You've been warned. Anyway, what were we talking about? Ah yes. You were saying, peon?

Stagehand #1: ..And two, I wouldn’t know how to be evil if it bit me in the ass. Though I did receive this letter to give to you about fifteen some odd minutes ago and it seems like a good place to start.

Jaro: Well..shit..why the fuck not? I have about a minute left of airtime to kill and this segment is going nowhere fast. Give it to me.

The stagehand happily gives the letter to Jaro. It is messily scrawled on standard notebook paper - as if a small child had written it. Jaro, in his robotic, dulcet tones, begins to recite the letter back to the audience and the other judges who peer inquisitively over his shoulder at the paper. The cameraman zooms into the letter itself for the audience to see. Curiously, the note itself is written in two different types of ink - causing an eerie sense of duality.

Upon finishing, Jaro looks to the other judges who, like him, seem greatly pleased with the turnout. The camera itself gets a close up of Jaro who, in turn, gives a trademark sneering grin much to the chagrin of the audience.

Jaro: Winner winner chicken dinner.

Zuzu Mark II: Wark wark, wark wark wark wark! WARK!! (That’s all for the Alchemy auditions! I’m Zuzu Mark II, see you on Anarchy 7.4!

Zuzu Mark II dodges another bullet and a third stagehand collapses as Jaro Idol fades to black.

Stone: Here’s our second Hayabusa Cup broadcast, the Ring of Steel Match. Let’s cut straight to it, before Foxx attempts to say something witty and fails.

Foxx: Hey...

Foxx’s microphone is cut off and the METALtron starts rolling the footage from the FMW Birthday Tournament match.

Cherry: The following match is the RING OF STEEL match! The match continues until one FMW superstar has escaped the cage. That superstar will then be declared the winner and will advance to the Fatal-Four Way Hayabusa Cup final!

”Lake of Fire” by Nirvana plays over the P.A. and Flare makes his way out onto the stage, looking tentatively at the steel structure that lies ahead.

Cherry: Introducing first, from the Utopian Nation, weighing in at 185 pounds, he is LORD FLAAAAAARRRRRRRE THE PRETTTTTTY!

The music changes to “Sons of Plunder” by Disturbed and Cactus Sam comes out staring down Flare, who is waiting anxiously in the ring.

Cherry: Weighing in at 250 pounds, from Birmingham, England, he is one half of the Full Metal Wrestling Tag Team Champions, he is CACTUSSSSSSSSSSS SAM!

“God’s Gonna Cut You Down” by Johnny Cash hits the P.A. System and the arena pops huge. Drew Michaels comes out, and makes his way down to the ring, focused on the cage.

Cherry: From Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, weighing in at 235 pounds, he is The Ultraviolent One, DREWWWWWWWW MIIIIIIIIIIIICHAELS!

Drew climbs up the steps and goes through the door, and the music changes to "Don’t Stop Me Now" by Queen and Bolton steps out onto the entrance ramp, cockily walking down to the ring.

Cherry: Lastly, weighing in at 230 pounds, from Sydney, Australia, this is BOLTON!

The bell rings

Larsen: And here we go again, the Ring of Steel match.

Foxx: No eliminations this time, all you have to do is escape to win!

Larsen: And Flare and Bolton make a break for the top of the cage immediately, but both are brought back by Michaels and Sam, respectively. Flare and Michaels trading punches now, and Sam has Bolton against the ropes. Irish whip across, and Bolton leaps and clings to the steel mesh! He’s climbing the cage! The other three men are rushing to stop now, and Bolton’s stopped!

Foxx: It’s a trap!

Larsen: It is! Moonsault by Bolton takes out the other three competitors! Now he’s climbing for the top of the cage already! This could be a short match! Nope, Michaels up now, and he’s trying to yank him off, but Bolton’s hanging tough! Flare up now too to help pull him off, and look at the teamwork! Elevated Double Powerbomb!

Foxx: Ouch.

Larsen: And Cactus over now, clotheslines both of Flare’s and Michael’s heads against the cage.

Foxx: Cactus Sam going for a climb of his own, he may have it here!

Larsen: He’s all on his own! Cactus Sam has made it to the top! He’s just about to slide over!

Foxx: NO! Damnit, that goddamn Drew Michaels got to his feet and he yanks Sam down by the leg, Sam is kicking at Michaels to shover him off! Michaels grabs a hold of Sam’s other leg, and he’s standing on the ropes!

Larsen: Drew may be going for an electric chair drop here! He’s got Sam on his shoulders!

Foxx: He does, but LOOK AT THIS! FLARE ON HIS FEET AND HE HAS DREW ON HIS SHOULDERS!!!

Larsen: HOLY SHIT! ELECTRTIC CHAIR DROP OF DOOM! Cactus Sam is dropped by Michaels, who’s dropper by Flare! What a quick move by the Prince of Pretty!

Foxx: Flare gets to his feet, and he’s trying to climb the cage this time! Michaels and Sam are in too much pain to stop him!

Larsen: But Bolton’s not! Bolton has recovered and he’s following Flare up! Both men trying to escape on the same wall!

Foxx: Trading punches between Flare and Bolton! Both men have made it to the top! They’re just sitting on top of the cage, trading punches! One of them could win this match right here and now!

Larsen: Cactus Sam is only just getting to his feet... he may not get up in time to stop either of them!

Foxx: Flare! Flare punches Bolton off! Bolton has fallen back to the mat and what a sickening thud! He’s definitely out of contention now!

Larsen: Bolton is out cold, but they can’t stop this match now, it’s Cactus Sam grabbing onto Flare! Flare can’t shake his grip and look at the sadistic grin on Cactus Sam’s face! He’s using Flare to help him climb the cage!

Foxx: Flare’s pissed off, he wants to finish this match and get that Hayabusa Cup Final! Sam has hoisted himself up and now he’s kneeling on that top rail of the cage!

Larsen: Flare now having to trade blows with Sam here! Cactus Sam wants that shot too!

Foxx: Flare throws one and Sam’s busted open! Sam is bleeding and he’s dazed! Flare grabs him and shifts his leg over!

Larsen: SHOVE FROM FLARE! CACTUS SAM CRASHES TO THE MAT! FLARE HAS THIS IN THE BAG!

Foxx: Flare’s got it won! He raises his arm in victory and he drops- WAIT! WAIT!

Larsen: LOOK AT THAT! DREW MICHAELS HAD ALREADY CLIMBED THE OTHER SIDE AND HE’S ALREADY TOUCHED THE GROUND BEFORE FLARE!

Foxx: Fuck! How did I not notice that? Drew Michaels wins the Ring of Steel and is advancing for the second year in a row to the Hayabusa Cup final!

Larsen: So that’s set then – Drew Michaels, Chris Austin, Harlequin and Butters will be meeting in the final match of the Hayabusa Cup!

Cherry: Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of this match via escaping the cage first, and advancing to the Hayabusa Cup final match, DREEEEEEEEW MIIIIIIIIIIICHAELS!!!!

Drew Michaels (8.45 aps + 1.2 avs = 9.65 total)
Janus Flare (8.43 aps + 0.8 avs = 9.23 total)
Cactus Sam (8.18 aps + 0.6 avs = 8.78 total)
Frank Dylan James (7.78 aps + 0.1 avs = 7.88 total)
Bolton (7.38 aps + 0.0 avs = 7.38 total)

Stone: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to Alchemy. We’ve just got an update regarding Travis McCart’s immediate status and it looks like he’ll be out indefinitely for the time being.

Foxx: It was a stupid move, honestly and that was a bit of bad luck on his part, and that’s why we have to remind everyone of the dangers of this sport and the dangers these men face every night we’re out here. Kids, don’t try this at home.

Stone: Well said there, partner, I’m glad you didn’t shit on Travis like you did earlier.

Foxx: Well, after all’s said and done you can’t help feeling bad for a guy who was injured by bad luck.

Stone: Can’t agree with you more there. Anyway, we’ve got the last match of the C-4 sprint next up and if any one of these guys take a better time than the current best, 9 minutes and 15 seconds by Leon Caprice.

Foxx: They may get a better time or they won’t, we’ll see – I hope Flare wins!

Stone: Let’s take it to Buster Cherry, then!

Nirvana’s “Lake of Fire” begins on the PA system as Flare comes down from the back to boos.

Cherry: The following contest is scheduled for one fall, and is a C-4 Sprint match! The current time to beat is 9 minutes and 15 seconds! Introducing first, hailing from the Utopian Nation, weighing one hundred and eighty-five pounds, this… is… FLARE!!!

Stone: The Prince of Pretty is out here tonight and I’ve heard he’s been proclaiming himself as the man who will soundly beat Drew Michaels.

Foxx: I wouldn’t put it past him – you know Flare is great and you know he is capable of victory right here.

Stone: Knowing Drew’s skill I can predict that he’ll give Flare a challenging contest on top of the time pressure.

Foxx: And you know Flare can beat the odds.

Stone: Let’s hope so, for your sake.

Foxx: What’s that supposed to mean?

Johnny Cash’s “God’s Gonna Cut You Down” replaces Nirvana as fan favourite Drew Michaels comes out to a huge pop.

Cherry: And his opponent, from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, weighing two hundred and thirty-five pounds, DREWWWW MICHAELS!!!

Foxx: Drew Michaels has come a long way from his former glory.

Stone: You can’t really say that. The man is getting back to said former glory, beginning with this match tonight.

Foxx: Too bad Flare’s gonna beat him.

Stone: Again with half-assed predictions?

Foxx: Oh, when I turn out to be right, you’ll be the one who’s half-assed!

Stone: That’ll be the day indeed.

Drew climbs in the ring as the ref goes to the middle to separate the two. Drew takes a corner for a while before facing Flare and slowly beginning to circle him slowly. The referee calls for the bell to be rung.

Stone: Everyone has to remember here that the official time to beat, if any one of these men want to be the new #1 contender for the C-4 title, the time to beat is 9:15. I don’t think both of these men are ready to give the other one an easy fight.

Foxx: Of course they aren’t. But you know Flare’s gonna come up top.

Stone: We’ll see. Flare going at it first with quick knife-edge chops to the chest of Drew Michaels who seems to have been caught off-guard by the sudden assault from his opponent.

Foxx: They’re under time pressure so they have to do it fast. Flare understands this.

Stone: Indeed he does but Drew Michaels starts fighting back with tough right hands, that probably feels like a hammer to the head every time. Now he’s progressed to elbows to the head!

Foxx: Flare’s getting hammered but he comes back with a vicious enzuigiri!

Stone: But Michaels isn’t going down! I think the size difference is to blame here!

Foxx: He’s not down but he’s definitely not in it either, so Flare capitalizes with a snap suplex! Flare going for the cover, one, t- no damnit Michaels kicks out!

Stone: Looking for the early pin but it’s just too early. Flare taking out his frustration on Michaels with quick stomps and a leg drop to his neck and torso and we’re almost near the one minute mark.

Foxx: Flare running to the corner and jumping, split-legged moonsault! Another pin! One, two, Michaels kicks out again god damnit!

Stone: There’s no putting away Michaels and Flare looks really pissed! Flare picks Michaels up, or tries to at the very least as Drew breaks free and comes back at Flare with lefts and rights and a headbutt! Michaels catches fire!

Foxx: No! This can’t be happening!

Stone: A rage of fury from Michaels right there and he waits for Flare to get back up and Michaels charges at him, going for the clothesline but Flare dodges and hits a lungblower on Michaels!

Foxx: Flare’s got the momentum back, yes!

Stone: And Flare tries to go for the pinfall once more! One, two, no, Michaels gets a shoulder up again at 2:30! Flare pins again! One, two, no, Michaels breaks out again! There’s just no putting him away!

Foxx: But Flare’s got more damage done and it won’t be soon before long!

Stone: Flare gets Michaels up and runs to the ropes and rebounds into a plancha! Flare’s just taking it to Michaels right now!

Foxx: I’ll say! Now Flare’s going for a lionsault!

Stone: But Michaels rolls out of the way! Both of them are down! Both of them are down and three minutes has now passed in this match and counting!

Foxx: Michaels was lucky there but I don’t see him up on his feet.

Stone: Well after the continued beating Flare gave him it’s gonna take a while.

Foxx: That’s what I meant.

Stone: Michaels slowly getting up on his feet and so is Flare and the slate is rubbed clean as all momentum is gone and both of these men have to start anew, and this is the part where it can be anyone’s game.

Foxx: Too bad it’s gonna be Flare’s game.

Stone: Well, Michaels is on the move as he preys upon Flare with those hard-hitting fists of his and he whips Flare and Flare comes back to eat a clothesline!

Foxx: No!

Stone: Michaels is slowly but surely catching fire and he’s calculating his moves, I noticed – he’s not moving in quickly like Flare was doing.

Foxx: And look where that’s got him now – there’s not much offense from Michaels so far.

Stone: But Michaels is in control right now. Drew lifts Flare on his shoulders and drops Flare into a facebreaker!

Foxx: No!

Stone: Michaels just on the path to wearing down Flare’s head and face area with those moves and I think that’s an intelligent plan right there.

Foxx: Or that bastard just wants to draw some blood from out of Flare, he’s messing up that pretty, pretty face!

Stone: Michaels picks Flare up and hooks his leg, fisherman suplex! Wait… I think that was a fisherman brainbuster!

Foxx: Stop killing him!

Stone: Michaels has still got a hold on Flare, I think he wants to do more! There goes another one!

Foxx: No!

Stone: I think he wants to hit three for three! Michaels raises Flare up again… but no, Flare counters! Reverse DDT! Flare is still in the game!

Foxx: Yes, I thought he was a goner there!

Stone: The clock’s almost at five minutes and we still have no clear winner in sight, both Drew Michaels and Flare are on the top of their game!

Foxx: Did you expect any less? The C-4 title is a prestigious belt and anyone would benefit from winning it.

Stone: Right you are there and once again the two men are down, Flare took two brainbusters and that does not feel good at all.

Foxx: At least Drew Michaels was stopped. That was the only thing that mattered.

Stone: The ref’s starting the knockout count now, hopefully it doesn’t reach ten.

Ref: ONE!

TWO!

THREE!

Stone: Drew’s stirring…

Foxx: But Flare’s still down, come on, get up Flare!

Ref: FOUR!

FIVE!

Stone: I think I see Flare moving a bit…

Foxx: Come on!

Ref: SIX!

SEVEN!

Stone: Flare’s getting up, and Drew’s up on his feet now…

Foxx: Whew! This match is too close. Too close for comfort.

Stone: It hasn’t failed to deliver so far and the clock has just passed 5:30.

Foxx: Now that Drew Michaels is coming for Flare, watch out Flare!

Stone: Drew Michaels on the attack but Flare dodges and nails a dropkick to Drew’s back and Drew hits the turnbuckle!

Foxx: And Flare hits a chokehold backbreaker! Flare’s in control!

Stone: Michaels is down and Flare is on fire! Flare’s got Drew’s legs, is this what I think he’s about to do?

Foxx: Seig-Punkt! Seig-Punkt! There’s no way Drew can escape from this one!

Stone: Flare pulls up Drew’s legs from his prone position and then with his legs, hooks Drew’s arms and pulls!

Foxx: Drew is getting twisted like a pretzel now and I love it!

Stone: Flare’s got a hold on Drew Michaels and he’s getting twisted apart by that Seig-Punkt, the ref checks on him, asks him if he wants to give up now but Drew Michaels is shaking his head!

Foxx: Flare’s gonna tear him apart, might as well tap out now!

Stone: He’d tap out if Flare wasn’t pulling his arms back but Drew doesn’t want to!

Foxx: Flare’s gonna win this one by Drew Michaels’s sheer stupidity! Tap out, man!

Stone: Drew’s got an indomitable will inside of him and he does not just submit!

Foxx: He should just go on and end his suffering and be done with it!

Stone: No dice, Foxx, Flare is pulling back and Drew is still hanging in there!

Foxx: What’s the time now? How long does Flare have left?

Stone: The official timer is nearing 6 minutes and 20, and if any one of these guys wants to be the #1 contender they better wrap up fast.

Foxx: Or Drew should just tap out.

Stone: You’re a little unlucky there, partner as Drew is still hanging on for dear life and I don’t know just how long he can hold it in.

Foxx: Not for long, I assume, Flare did beat him down a lot early in this contest.

Stone: Flare is pulling back with all his might and as his body can allow him in such an unusual position and Drew is screaming out in pain. There is no sign of relenting from either men and that just shows you how badly they want to win this match.

Foxx: And Drew should just give it up for Flare. It’s all over, I mean come on, he’s in the hold, screaming in pain.

Stone: The ref checking up on Drew Michaels again, asking him if he wants to submit… Drew shakes his head no and the match continues. You’ve just got to love the tenacity of this man.

Foxx: What is there to love? This isn’t tenacity, this is stupidity being mistaken for bravery, and this is only delaying the inevitable that is the victory of Flare!

Stone: Somewhere at this point in time you know Flare’s gotta be worn down from applying the hold either. It’s not as if the position is as comfortable as, what, an STF?

Foxx: Flare’s stronger than that.

Stone: But lighter than Drew. The ref checks up on Drew once more and Drew is still refusing to go, and suddenly Flare drops the hold at around 7 minutes and 20! The gap is slowly getting smaller!

Foxx: Drew is down! He’s still down! Flare goes for the pin! One, two, thr- no Drew gets a shoulder up! God damnit!

Stone: I thought Drew was done there for sure, it’s amazing he’s still got life left in him!

Foxx: Amazing? More like annoying!

Stone: Flare picks Drew up and kicks him, tries to go for an enzuigiri but Drew summons all his strength to push Flare’s foot back, lumping him on the mat!

Foxx: No!

Stone: Drew looks woozy over there and Flare looks to take advantage, run to the ropes, Flare leaps for a clothesline but Drew catches Flare in a desperation lightning spiral!

Foxx: NO!

Stone: Drew still looks a little out of it but gaining some more momentum as it is now 8 minutes and 15 seconds on the clock, he’s got one minute left to try and win, can he seal the deal?

Foxx: If Flare has to go down, Drew Michaels has to go down with him!

Stone: Drew goes to pick Flare up but Flare pushes him back, Flare may still be in the game, Flare runs to the ropes again, you’d think he would know better after Drew’s counter, Flare with the spinning heel kick but Drew dodges! Drew dodges!

Foxx: Damn you, Drew Michaels!

Stone: Flare up on his feet but Drew is quicker on the uptake, a kick to the gut, Drew wastes no time with the WICKED DDT!

Foxx: NOOO!

Stone: The cover! One, two, three! Drew Michaels scores the pinfall at 8:40! Drew Michaels is the new #1 contender to the C-4 title at Catalyst!

Cherry: The winner of this match, and the winner of the C-4 Sprint with a time of 8 minutes and 40 seconds, the new #1 contender to the C-4 championship… DREWWW MICHAEEELS!!!

Drew Michaels (8.4 aps + 1.5 avs = 9.9 total)
Janus Flare (8.15 aps + 0.7 avs = 8.85 total)

Foxx: Drew stole that one!

Stone: No, I think it was a pretty good and close contest, it all came down to who was able to think faster on his feet and execute.

Foxx: Bullshit!

Stone: Don’t worry, Foxx, you’ll get over it someday. Good luck sleeping tonight. Anyone who says that Michaels is just a backyard garbage...

Foxx: Pompous, overbearing, over-exposed...

Stone: Why do you have to be so negative?

Foxx: It's because I have severe daddy issu-

[alc]Foxx's parlance of his lack of familial stablity is cut short as the haunting, forceful words "I Still Kill" echo throughout the arena to only be matched with a significant pop. Eminem's "The Way I Am" soon follows with Alchemy's pontiff finding his way through the stage curtain. There stands RAMPAGE!, soaking in the cheers that he receives from the crowd. Before Foxx can begin commiserating on his presence or Stone speculating as to why he is there, Jones holds up a hand as to indicate to the crowd that he has something important to say.

RAMPAGE!: Cut my music...and please, Shelia - don't introduce me tonight. I got some shit to say. Dallas..how y'all feelin'?

The Texas crowd responds, in kind, to the cheap pop to which RAMPAGE! bobs his head up and down.

RAMPAGE!: Right, right. Well as y'all heard earlier this week, FMW's next event, Catalyst, will feature stipulations, match variants, and potential opponents that are all not up to myself and Celeste but up to you, the fans. How y'all feel about that?

Again, the Texas crowd cheers at this revelation.

RAMPAGE!: Now don't get it twisted. This isn't some kind of cheap or chintzy rip-off of less reputable companies who might or might not have similar ideas akin to our own. No, this isn't the illusion of you, the people choosing who does what. This is a celebration of democracy, people; an ode and an example that your opinions, views, ideologies shape what we do and who we are. It is a celebration of the greatest damn country on the planet, regardless of who says otherwise; the United States of America.

Obviously playing to the right crowd, the patriotic Texans respond with a loud "U.S.A." chant. RAMPAGE! walks across the stage, looking out into the sea of humanity.

RAMPAGE!: Now, with that in mind, there are some matters that need taking care of. Our current Full Metal Wrestling Champion, Christian G. Smitten...

At mention of Smitten's name, the crowd shows their malign for the Legal Eagle with passionate indignation.

RAMPAGE!: ...would like to exercise the letter of the law, use what power and influence that he has, and worm his way out defending his championship. In doing so, he has tried to put as much distance between himself and his de facto number one contender in former FMW Champion John "Doc" Derrick...

The crowd explodes at mention of Doc's name.

RAMPAGE!: So to ensure that ol'boy don't get too buck, as you may have heard via FMW.com, I have conferred with Celeste and she has agreed that it be in the best interests that Smitten return home to Alchemy where he was little more than a generic and ambiguously gay biker complete with chains, ass less chaps, a chip on his shoulder, a law degree, and the ability to job to any person you put in front of him. Oh, how far we have come...

The sarcasm dripping in Dante's voice coupled with the laughter from the crowd illicit snorts and chuckles from even the commentating staff. When the noise dies down, Jones continues to the other side of the arena.

RAMPAGE!: With this in mind, I would be remiss to not give Johnny a shot at redemption. That's why in the main event for Catalyst, it will be the champion, Christian G. Smitten versus the challenger John "Doc" Derrick!

The crowd's spirits uplifted, the applause is filled with mirth and excitement. Even RAMPAGE! himself seems pleased with himself and his announcement.

Stone: That's a huge main event for Catalyst!

Foxx: Something tells me he's not done. That's just your standard rematch clause blow-off match after a new champion is crowned.

Stone: Y'know, you're really negative all the time.

RAMPAGE!: Judging from the lack of a truly earth shattering response, either you've watched Anarchy or you were expecting more. That's why you, the fans, will get to vote on the third participant in a Triple Threat for the Full Metal Championship! Your choices will consist of The Cleveland Crippler, Nick Bryson!

Bryson's name is met with stamping and clapping, obviously a fan favourite.

RAMPAGE!: ..Former Full Metal Champion and a man who, admittedly deserves his shot to reclaim said gold, Eric Scorpio!

Scorpio, however, is not met with as much enthusiasm. In fact, it is the exact opposite of such as jeering and catcalling soon follow.

RAMPAGE!: And my personal addition to this match (and someone I know you all will appreciate), a man who can I can sympathize with as well as commend for his courage and dedication..none other than our own Abandoned Champion, Skyler Striker!
The roof nearly comes unglued at the mention of Striker who, quite easily, gets the biggest pop of the evening as Alchemy’s option for the match.

Foxx: Jesus. You would think that Striker is the second coming of Christ. If I was Michaels, I'd sue for gimmick infringement on that basis.

Stone: The fans have a right to cheer Striker! This main event is obviously going to be a match that we will all remember.

RAMPAGE!: Now that that's out of the way, I'll be the first to admit that since the draft, there has been a critical element missing from Alchemy. After all, it doesn't quite feel like Alchemy without the C-4 Championship showing people each and every night that, beneath all of the bullshit, we are wrestlers and our craft that we hone should be shown in its purest form. So as we just learned, for the C-4 Championship we will have Anarchy's own Hostyle, the incumbent champion against The Chosen One, Drew Michaels! In your hands is the power to choose which match they will be participating in; 30 Minute Iron Man, Hostyle Territories, or Maximum C-4!

At this point, the crowd breaks into a standing ovation, obviously overjoyed over the prospect of the C-4 Championship returning home.

Foxx: Urgh. I'm still disgusted about this match. Does anyone else see the irony that our greatest C-4 Division Champion to date, the Imperator of Innovation himself is banished to no man's land against of those mongrel, garbage wrestling rejects in Drew Michaels?

Stone: If anything, Michaels proved his mettle as a wrestler in a solid outing against Flare.

When the crowd noise dies down, RAMPAGE!'s look grows more grave.

RAMPAGE!: But what I really wanted to talk to you about was the current holder of the Mount Vesuvius Torch in William McKenzie. You know this man as TyranT.

Before RAMPAGE! can complete TyranT's name, the hatred for this man is shown in spades. Dante himself is steely, stoic, and callous as he stands there, enduring the umbra of anathema.

RAMPAGE!: I'm going to direct this to you, Bill. I'd like to say that I respect that you're a father and you're doing what's best for you and your little girl. I'd like to say that I can just step aside and let you go on with your career. I hope and pray every day that I just let that loss go, chalk it up to the game passing me by, and call it a night. But you and I both know an indisputable fact; I don't walk away from shit, bruh. Especially a fight.

RAMPAGE! pauses, pensively gazing into the ether whilst the fans show their encouragement.

RAMPAGE!: I sat at home, Bill. I sat at home by myself, thinking...pondering..wondering if I was still the same man. I sat at the edge of my bed late at night, haunted by it. Driven insane by it. It's like a constant fucking drumming in my head. A voice that's always telling you you aren't good enough, you aren't strong enough, you aren't the right color...that you're just an ordinary, typical nigga. You don't amount to shit, boy. You ain't fit enough to lick my boots.

You've poisoned my soul, B. You made me doubt myself. You made me question the mission. You've given me cancer and worst of all, you made me do something I swore on my grandmoms I'd never do. You forced me to apologize. You forced me to look into my reflection and apologize that I'd become a mockery of everything that I've ever stood for. And it hurt me so badly, that I isolated myself. Backed myself into a corner. Began seeing things that wasn't there. Hallucinating. Paranoia. Nausea. Anxiety. I wasn't and still am not fit to run this show. With that in mind, I've come to a decision that will affect me for years to come...

The crowd boos, expecting the worst from this announcement.

Stone: You don't think RAMPAGE! is going to retire, do you Foxx?

Foxx: I dunno. I haven't seen Blackie this unhinged since those dealings with Syanide.

RAMPAGE!:...My decision is that tonight is the last time you will ever hear me utter the words "I'm sorry". Because "I'm sorry" I didn't show myself that I was better than that. I'm "sorry" that I looked at you, Bill, as nothing more than a joke. And I'm also "sorry" I didn't take out four hundred years of oppression, tyranny, ignorance, hatred, and blind rage out on you when I had the chance. But finally and most importantly, Billy, I'm going to have to apologize to your daughter. Because I know she, like my child, is tired of seeing what this business does to the man she looks up to. With that in mind, I'm going to make you look how I feel, William. Picture it, if you can grasp the concept, you sunnovabitch. I want you to look in my motherfuckin' eyes and ask yourself if you think I'm playing.

RAMPAGE! would grab the nearest camera, fire dancing passionately in his eyes. He begins walking towards the back, rustling behind the stage curtain momentarily.

RAMPAGE!: I told you, 'B. You've infected me. Because I will not rest until your cancer is removed from me. I won't rest until your disease no longer infects everything it touches. This goes for your boys Dunn and especially my favorite, Sammy, too. You've grown bold; malignant - a tumorous growth that continues to mutate and adapt far beyond what can be predicted. For too long, I've allowed for in action out of fear of failure dictate my actions.

RAMPAGE! returns to the center stage with one arm behind his back, glowering into the fanbase once more. He'd slowly reveal that he was brandishing his trademark baseball bat which sent tremors though the crowd.

RAMPAGE!: So then, it occurred to me that you and people like you don't operate in conventional means. That unless you are forcefully exorcised, you won't just fade away. And the only person who is going to make that happen is me.

I will tear out my heart if I have to, Willy.

If that's what it takes to stop you, I will throw myself in harm's way.

I'll put my life in the hands of the people..
My legacy...
My body...
My career.

This isn't to prove to the people that I'm still a badass, bruh. This is to prove to myself that I still deserve to carry the burden of my own name and the guilt that I will never be a perfect father. I was gone for awhile, 'B. But guess what..? I came back. Knock knock. Little pig, little pig - let me in...

[/alc]

Stone: Welcome back ladies and gentlemen! I just have to say how awesome I’m feeling right now. I didn’t want to say too much in front of Foxx here since this show opened up, but I just can’t contain it anymore. I’ve been going for hours without saying it...

Foxx: What the hell you talkin’ about?

Stone: Isn’t it obvious? I’m just like... one of the greatest commentators there has ever been in this federation! As far as I’m concerned I own this table and I own you.

Foxx: And what the hell makes you come up with such a dumb as fuck idea as that?

Stone: Elementary my dear Foxx. Who was it that managed to commentate for one of the greatest events this entire federation has to offer? You know what I’m talking about! The big Mt. V?! Who was there that night using his delicate and inspirational voice to amaze the watching fans at home, taking them by the hand to lead them through one hell of an adventure? And who wasn’t selected to commentate?

Foxx: Screw yourself. And screw that Morphapussy! I hate you all!

Stone: Putting my massive ego aside, coming up next is tonight’s main event. And what a match we have lined up for you tonight.

Foxx: This match is pretty much worthy of Main Event PPV material within itself. We have both the Abandoned Champion and runner up to Mt. V, Skyler Striker, once more teaming up with the former World Heavy Weight Champion John Derrick. I don’t like the guys, but you don’t get much bigger then that when it comes to two fuckin’ colossus’ teaming together.

Stone: But that’s not all this match has to offer, as their opponents are the Mt. V winner and future Ultimatum number one contender, TyranT, and he’s teaming up with none other than the top man of the entire federation at this present moment. He is the World Heavyweight champion of Full Metal Wrestling. CG Smitten! You can only find such a match on Alchemy!

Foxx: I think what makes this match so awesome is the developing hatred that webs between the two teams. It goes without saying that Striker and TyranT have really been going out of their way to terrorize each other since they arrived in that crap hole called NEW. Both men are constantly out doing each other and we’ve seen what has to be coming onto nearly a yearlong rivalry. Although it’s been somewhat stop start, there is always a moment when these two guys face off, and it’s always something to see.

Stone:And talk about desire for vengeance tonight. No doubt John Derrick will be directly seeking revenge from Smitten, who not only took the world title from him, but also completely brutalized the former champ after the match with quite an unforgettable display of violence. Not to mention what happened over the nasty collision when Smitten basically ran over Sara.

Foxx: Hmm. I’d run over Sara any day of the week.

Stone: Needless to say, there’s a lot of hate in Derrick tonight, and no doubt he will be giving Smitten a piece of his mind in just a few moments.

Foxx: Yeah, but this is Smitten we’re talking about here. I find it hard to believe he’s not going to be ready for Derrick tonight. I’m tellin you. Just watch the man, he’s a champion for a reason and I think he’s gonna prove that once again tonight when he owns Derrick! AGAIN!

Stone: One can only wonder if all these competitors tonight are in 100% condition after enduring Circus Maximus. Team Derrick and Striker must be suffering the most after Derrick was brutally attacked and after Skyler was thrown 55 feet from the top of Mt. V! But with such big names and such a big card to live up to, I seriously doubt the four men will disappoint tonight.

Map of the Problematique suddenly begins to roll off the PA system making for one hell of a malicious reaction from the crowd. The arena is filled with nothing but hate as soon enough, both CG Smitten and TyranT make their entrance together. TyranT noticeably doesn’t seem to pleased with his entrance music not in play as he doesn’t even spin the nightstick in his hands. But Smitten on the other hand looks very proud, as he possesses the World Heavyweight Championship over his shoulder. Both men begin to walk down to the ring to the chorus of jeers as TyranT makes a few idle threats to fans whilst Smitten just wears a proud smile upon his face. Both men enter the ring and take their respective corner, though little words are exchanged between the two weary partners.

Foxx: Quite unusual for the World Champ to come out first. But I figure RAMPAGE! wants to save the better reaction for later, son of a bitch that he is. I can’t say these guys are looking like much of a team right now looking at TyranT and Smitten exchange words.

Stone: Can you blame them? The Ultimatum number one contender and the World Champ! We could see these two guys fighting each other next year for the biggest title of the federation. I also think this might be TyranT’s first ever Tag team match since coming into the FMW.

Foxx: Yeah good point. I’ve seen him in a few cluster fuck matches but I have to say this is the first time I’ve seen him in a tag. But what better partner to have then the world champion? I have a feeling these guys will come up good tonight despite some issues they may have.

Stone: May I also add that RAMPAGE! is not a son of a bitch.

“Gimme Shelter” hits next, and brings the entire arena up onto its feet as roars and cheers echo out. There is a good moment of build-up from the opening moments of the song before both John Derrick and Skyler Striker appear when the Rolling Stones song builds up. There is no playing to the crowd this time as both men look very focused tonight. Derrick and Striker slowly begin to make their way to the ring, with Derricks entrance theme simply becoming drowned out by the cheers of the fans for both Derrick himself and the Abandoned Champion Skyler Striker. Both men enter the ring as Smitten and TyranT are notably outside of it, looking in. Both teams exchange words, no doubt deciding who starts as Gimme Shelter finally fades out.

Stone: A very solid team. Striker and Derrick are as tough as they come!

Foxx: You say that, but they’ve not exactly been the most successful tag team ever formed. I mean the other week they were beaten by the tag team champions, Mortus and Cactus Sam.

Stone: You’re not giving their partnership much justice. This is only the second time both Striker and Derrick have teamed together in a match, and this time, there is no chaos with several other teams to compete against. This is just a classic two vs. two match up, and I think both Striker and Derrick have more then what it takes to really pull out a good clean victory tonight.

Foxx: Ha! Clean victory?! You’re kidding right? After what Smitten done to Derrick?

Stone: Fair point.

Foxx: Here’s an interesting start up! TyranT’s going in first as Smitten takes to ringside just beyond those ropes. A brief look between Derrick and Striker, and both of them know who is starting off first without even any words spoken. Striker and TyranT to start things off! This is already epix! And that’s the bell! Both men are in the ring and this match just about gets started!

Both Striker and TyranT circle each other in the ring for a moment as the crowd are already going crazy for the long time rivalry between the two. It only takes a few seconds before the “Striker” chant starts, making TyranT stop in his tracks as he glances around with disgust at the chanting fans whilst Striker only glares at the old timer with a sly smile.

Stone: Can you feel the energy? It was shocking to see the Italian crowd take to TyranT at Circus Maximus, but now we are back home and things are exactly how they should be. The energy these fans unleash will be enough to drive Striker to that decisive blow.

Foxx: Considering you think of yourself as the best commentator, you sure like to talk out of your ass. Since when does the crowd ever give you “energy”?

Stone: Silence you inferior fool! TyranT’s finally made the first move to get the ball rolling. A quick surprising clothesline attempt! Striker seen it coming a mile away with an easy evasion! And a solid drop kick against the veteran has sent him stumbling against the ropes. The crowd liked that. What’s this? TyranT’s rolled out of the ring!

Foxx: Tactical thinking by the TyranT. He didn’t get the better of Striker so he’s taking a time out to re-plan his strategy.

Stone: It’s called cowardice where I come from! Striker doesn’t look best pleased, the ref is counting TyranT and he won’t enter until Striker backs away from the ropes.

Foxx: Striker is finally backing away, but TyranT still ain’t entering. He’s certainly not happy about something. It was only a drop kick. The refs up to seven now. But here comes Smitten! Smitten is coming to get Striker whilst his back is turned!

Stone: But here is Derrick to counter! Derrick is climbing through the ropes and Smitten has suddenly reconsidered his plan as he backs his way towards his corner. Derrick is glaring at Smitten whilst Smitten is just showing him a somewhat amused expression.

Foxx: He’s just keeping the man on his toes.

Stone: TyranT seemed pissed, looks like this was his tactic all along and now he’s forced to enter at the count of nine!

Foxx: And Striker’s right on top of him!

Stone: We’ve seen this mistake before! Striker is going for a suplex attempt on the 315lbs veteran from the other side of the ropes! TyranT is landing in a few strikes to get free. But Striker lifts him! He goes all the way! Did you feel that impact! TyranT has just been slammed right down in a perfectly executed suplex. It seems Strikers’ been working out! He’s straight up on his feet, bouncing up on the ropes! A solid knee drop against the chest of TyranT! TyranT is in pain and it looks like he wants to roll out again! But a swift kick from Derrick has forced him back in! The ref is having a few words.

Foxx: Oh come on! If Smitten or TyranT did that, you’d be moaning and bitching all through the match. Commentate fairly you fag!

Stone: Just one thing I have to say. Mount V! Can you say that?... CAN YOU SAY THAT?!

Foxx: TyranT is getting up to one knee, he looks a little shaken after the heavy slam from a basic suplex! Striker has cleverly used his own weight against him. Striker is off the ropes, springboard attempt! But Smitten has grabbed the ropes and pulled them down! Striker doesn’t get the momentum he was hoping for! An awkward landing from some form of moonsault attempt!

Stone: That was just uncalled for by Smitten. He’s supposed to be a professional wrestler and he’s fell back to some harsh tactics. Derrick is not impressed; you can see it upon his face as he tries to give some verbal support to Striker who seems a little dazed after Smitten’s treachery.

Foxx: Treachery? Everything goes if you can get away with it! FMW isn’t exactly famous for its referees you know? Here comes TyranT, dragging Striker up to his feet rather viciously by his face. A solid strike to his gut to keep him stunned. TyranT’s now got Striker ready for something. Could be a fall away slam.

Stone: Listen to that hick! I can hear him trash talking the crowd from here whilst he walks around with Striker as if he weights nothing! The crowd are giving him one hell of a malicious reaction. Whoa! TyranT finally hits the fallaway slam! But he launches Striker right at John Derrick who falls from ringside.

Foxx: Hah! He’s a sly one that TyranT. But what’s this? The ref is counting that as a tag! John Derrick is straight back up and into the ring.

Stone: TyranT’s backing off whilst Striker rolls out for now, he really landed awkwardly from Smitten’s cheap trick. I hope he’s all right.

Foxx: John Derrick is holding off though. He’s standing there, just glaring at the old timer who stares back. Listen to this crowd go crazy. They are really getting behind team Derrick and Striker. And look at this! Derrick is pointing at Smitten, he wants TyranT to tag Smitten.

Stone: Smitten doesn’t look too impressed. But it looks like TyranT is complying. One can wonder if TyranT is afraid to face Derrick after what happened in Anxiety some time ago when he was still under Cynical’s rule.

Foxx: What? No! TyranT’s all man. He’s just being wise and bringing in a fresh face!

A massive pop comes from the watching fans as Smitten is tagged in. Derrick charges like a rabid beast, taking the world champion straight down with a solid shoulder tackle before he mounts him, beginning to throw straight lefts and rights upon him whilst he’s down..

Stone: The gloves are off! Derrick is absolutely punishing Smitten! I can’t help but feel some small amount of justice is finally being received!

Foxx: Are you kidding?! These are illegal moves Derrick’s dishing out! The ref is trying to drag him off! This is like watching Adrian fight! God rest his soul by the way.

Stone: Smitten has clutched onto the ropes. The referee is counting! Derrick is finally off from Smitten. Ooh! He just spat on him whilst he was down! Disgusting.

Foxx: Now its Smitten’s turn! He’s pissed off now after such a vicious and uncalled for attack! A solid clothesline and now he’s the one dishing out some punishment to John Derrick on the ground. The referee is having a tough time trying to break the two up once more! Both men are simply punching the crap out of each other. Why didn’t these guys start things off, this is so much more fast paced? This is amazing!

Stone: But it is not wrestling... Derrick has finally managed to battle Smitten off of him. He’s dragging the World Champion up to his feet! A solid knee to the stomach, and now Derrick is setting up Smitten for a DDT! He lifts him up! Wham! A solid elevated DDT! That’s certainly shook the champion up quite a bit.

Foxx: Derrick is wasting no time putting the boot in on the World Champion. TyranT seems in no rush to go and assist him.

Stone: Derrick is dragging Smitten up once more, he’s setting him up into a torture rack position. And he’s going for a tag to Striker, he’s made his partner the legal man. This can’t be good for Smitten! Derrick is keeping him in that torture rack position and Striker’s climbing the ropes super quick! He’s leapt up! A solid leg drop upon Smitten’s exposed head! And Derrick has let him go, allowing him to fall awkwardly with Striker into a devastating double team move!!! I think Derrick seems content with that for now, and it seems Striker is now taking control of this match. He’s dragging the world champion back up to his feet. A solid strike to keep him off balance. And another!

Foxx: I don’t even think Smitten knows where he is right now! He needs to tag out as soon as possible to get his bearings!

Stone: Striker against the ropes! Springboard! The crowd are going crazy as Striker hits a moonsault on the standing and dazed Smitten. Taking him right now! And Striker is getting up again, rushing towards the turnbuckle. He’s just kicked off against it instead of climbing! Ooof! A knee drop on the fallen Champion! I think that’s woke Smitten up however as he rolls to TyranT to make a tag! And here comes the TyranT!

Foxx: This is where the match turns!

Stone: No it isn’t! Striker really showing TyranT for his age, evading the stampeding juggernaut only to drop kick him towards the turnbuckle!

Foxx: TyranT quickly turning around. Only to get hit back against the turnbuckle by Striker with another swift and skilful boot! He’s jumped up against him! Monkey toss from Striker to TyranT, once again using his own fat bastard weight against him! C’mon TyranT! What the hell are you doing?!

Stone: TyranT is getting easily frustrated by Striker who is running circles around him. The big man is up to his feet, shouting out with a bright red face all kinds of remarks I dare not repeat with so many viewers watching.

Foxx: I will then. He just called Striker a mother fucker.

TyranT begins to challenge Striker to come at him whilst he stands in the centre of the ring. Striker in the mean time simply circles around the old timer, looking in full focus before he runs back to bounce into the ropes.

Foxx: Well it’s good to know he’s up for the challenge. But what is he gonna do against 315lbs of pure flab and muscle!

Stone: A solid drop kick! But TyranT only takes a single step back. He’s got Striker now by the neck whilst he’s on the ground. He’s dragging him up to his feet! A nasty shove back... but what’s this? He’s challenging him again! He’s trying to see if Striker can knock him down!

Foxx: Who the hell does TyranT think he is? The Unmovable object?!

Stone: Striker is going for something again. He’s got a lot of momentum this time! A solid knee strike to TyranT’s chest! But the man is laughing it off! He wants him to go at him again!

Foxx: Another drop kick! This time high enough to reach the face of TyranT. Its sent him reeling but he’s still on his feet! Striker isn’t letting up! Another attack in the form of a shoulder block! TyranT’s still not falling! Heh. The bastard is made of Iron I swear it! I am IRON MAN... naa naaa naa na na... naa na naa na naa na naa naa naa naaaaa!

Stone: I think I know what TyranT’s going for! Here comes Striker again! But TyranT is moving towards him this time! We could see a TyranT slam! But no! Striker has read TyranT well! He’s ducked right under him! A spinning heel kick! And TyranT’s taken more damage then he was intending after failing his classic possum! He’s against the turnbuckle!

Foxx: Holy shit! Striker is moving fast! He’s setting up TyranT for Skyler High Dive II! This could be a massive upset right here!

Stone: How the hell would it be an upset?! But here comes Smitten! A quick save after shoving Striker right off the top of the turnbuckle! And a quick forced tag! Heh. He’s even shoving TyranT to the outside whilst he was still in his dazed state!

Foxx: Its Smitten and Striker in the ring once more! Striker using his impressive speed to come at Smitten with a fast spinning wheel kick attempt! But YES! Smitten has read it! He’s caught the fast whippet in his arms! And a big Pump handle slam to really knock the wind out of Striker!

Stone: Smitten has secured his arms around Strikers torso as the man is trying to get up! Smitten is now lifting Striker with impressive ease into a lifting German Suplex!

Foxx: Ouch! Striker landed straight on the back of his neck and shoulders! But Smitten is keeping hold of him. He’s dragging him up to his feet for another! And he lands it! Multiple German suplexes! He’s going for a third! But somehow Striker has managed to move with it! Smitten has over thrown him! And Strikers on his feet after an semi impressive flip! A quick neckbreaker from Striker to Smitten and both men are down on the ground! I think we might be in for one of those predictable shitty WWE moments!

Stone: Striker looks like he had the wind knocked out of him. Derrick is looking for a Tag, he’s got his arm outstretched! Striker is slowly getting to his feet. Smitten is lurking behind him! A solid clothesline from behind! Striker has been put down! But not without making the tag first! And here comes John Derrick to a massive explosion from the crowd.

Foxx: Don’t worry folks. He’s talking literally. There are no terrorists in this building tonight.

Stone: A right hand has dropped Smitten! He’s on his feet again only to be dropped again! Classic style wrestling going on right here! TyranT is half way through the ropes to come and assist having finally recovered!

Foxx: All he gets is a boot back to the outside for his troubles!

Stone: It’s all John Derrick here!

John Derrick continues his assault upon Smitten, dropping him again before hitting a classic high angled bodyslam. He soon follows up with a few stomps before running against the ropes and jumping up reasonably high to land an elbow drop. He goes for the cover..

1...
2
Th...

Foxx: Two count but a reasonably strong flick out. It’s gonna take more than that me thinks. This is the world heavyweight champion we are talking about. Heh! Just imagine he went out to an elbow drop! Hell... that would be the end of his career right there it would.

Stone: Derrick is dragging Smitten back up to his feet once more. He’s got Smitten set up for a piledriver! This could be deadly! But here comes TyranT! He’s decided he won’t let this pass! What the hell?! He’s got that nightstick in his hands and the ref can’t even see it! He’s about to blind side Derrick!

Foxx: Oh come on! Where the hell did Striker come from?!

Stone: Striker has TyranT marked tonight! A solid spring board dropkick has sent the flab... I mean veteran right outside the ring. Oh sure, the ref only notices now as he commands Striker to leave the ring! But this gives Derrick all the time he needs!

Foxx: Ooof! A jumping piledriver! Smitten’s entire body literally bounced from the sickening impact. He’s lying down motionless now! And here comes Derrick with another cover after such a deadly move.

1...

Stone: But no. The TyranT has dragged the ref outside! The ref is starting to shout like hell! Typical TyranT simply begins to argue back, pointing an accusing finger at Striker! Striker is simply shouting back! Its developing into a crazy commotion!

Foxx: Where the hell is Derrick going? He’s going to the front row of the fans area! He’s managed to steal someone’s bottle of beer! Now he’s drinking it! Heh. Can’t say I like the guy much, but his style does deserve some praise!

Stone: Wait a minute. He’s going back into the ring with that beer bottle! Smitten is slowly getting up to his feet. The ref is distracted by TyranT and Striker who are nearly trading blows when neither is the legal man and the ref is stupidly trying to gain control of them!

Foxx: Derrick just smashed the beer bottle over Smitten’s head! Smitten is back down again, blood is starting to run down the forehead of the world champ as he rolls around in agony!

Stone: I can’t say I approve of this at all!

Foxx: Derrick is dragging Smitten up to his feet! But Smitten managed to pick up the nightstick TyranT dropped! A low blow! A low blow with the nightstick! And he’s followed it up with a slam across the face! Now Derrick is busted open! And Smitten has tossed it away just in the nick of time as the ref finally enters the ring!

Stone: What the hell?!

Foxx: What? You don’t approve of justice either?

Stone: TyranT looks content at ringside whilst Striker can’t believe it! There’s a pinfall attempt from Smitten! This could be it!

1.
2.
Thre....

Foxx: Derrick flicked out! How the hell?!

Stone: He got enough energy to just about lift that shoulder up. He’s now sliding over to try and get the tag. But Smitten is dragging him back to his own corner! A tag to the TyranT! But what is the TyranT doing?! He’s climbing the turnbuckle! Smitten is lifting Derrick up towards TyranT who is setting him up for.... A powerbomb!

Foxx: Striker can’t watch anymore as he quickly enters the ring! But he is intercepted half successfully by Smitten as both men clothesline each other down to the ground! And here comes TyranT!

Stone: Super powerbomb from the top of the turnbuckle! And John Derrick is flat out down! A quick cover attempt and this could be it!

Foxx: Not even a two count as Striker is there to make the save! A solid boot to the back of TyranT has removed 315lbs of flab from the chest of Derrick!

Stone: Striker is not finished! He’s continuing to stomp away at TyranT who is struggling to get up to his feet! But a solid punch to the stomach of Striker has doubled him over! TyranT is now setting Striker up for a powerbomb! He’s turning towards the turnbuckle! But no! A hurricanrana counter has flipped TyranT back first against the turnbuckle!

Foxx: All four men are down. The ref isn’t even certain who the legal men are anymore. Though I can tell you it’s Derrick and TyranT right now.

Stone: Maybe you should quit the commentary and join up for the referee shirt.

Foxx: Fuck you!

Stone: There is some life in Smitten has he slowly begins to get up. The ref is asking him if he is the legal man! But he’s not answering. He’s simply climbing the turnbuckle! This isn’t Smitten’s area so what the hell is he up to?

Foxx: But Striker is back up to his feet! Smitten has only just got his position and Striker is up there lightning fast! He has him in a bulldog position! Wha... Shit! Look out!!!

Stone: AHHHH!

Both Smitten and Striker fall from the top turnbuckle, slamming straight into the commentators table as it simply collapses below them. Both men lie on the ground completely laid out as Foxx can’t help but land a few weak kicks against the grounded Striker who doesn’t seemed phased by them but rather still in pain from the impact.

Foxx: Take that you Aussie bastard!

Stone: What kind of a kick is that Foxx? I don’t even think Striker can even feel them!

Foxx: What?! You think I’m actually going to kick Skyler Striker for real?! He’d kick my fuckin ass!

Back in the ring, Derrick is once more on his feet as he begins to pick up the TyranT, sending some solid strikes his way before shoving him against the turnbuckle to begin a flurry of punches.

Stone: Will you stop with the kicks already? All your doing is annoying him! Back in the ring Derrick is managing to take point of the match, really beating TyranT within an inch of his life. A solid push from TyranT has put some distance between them!

Foxx: Distance that is quickly taken up by Derrick as he clotheslines TyranT back down to the mat! God damn everyone is turnbuckle happy today! Derrick is going up this time, the only man who hadn’t climbed anything in this match so far! He leaps upwards! Oooof! A double stomp down on the chest of TyranT! And TyranT is rolling away to the centre of the ring! He’s in agony aft... Ahh!

Stone: Striker is finally up ladies and gentlemen! And Foxx has been shoved behind me into the crowd. I warned him such a thing might have occurred.

Foxx: You did not!

Stone: Striker is returning to ringside. Smitten is also beginning to stir. The match is still in Derrick’s control however as he powerslams the TyranT down against the mat. A quick pinfall attempt!

1.
2..
Thre

Foxx: Not enough!

Stone: Derrick is finally falling back to make a tag to Striker! Making him the legal man. And Striker enters to another pop from the crowd as he rushes in! He’s still full of energy it seems! TyranT is only up to one knee! Flash magic! And the man is down again after being on the receiving end of Striker’s knee!

Foxx: Oh god! It lives! Smitten is finally back on his feet again as he makes his way to ring side. He’s probably glad the match is still going but he looks beat up!

Stone: Not surprising given he destroyed our table! OUR TABLE!!!

Foxx: A DDT to TyranT, and Striker makes a quick tag to Derrick to keep things mixed up!

Stone: Both men are now in the ring as Striker and Derrick set TyranT up for a double suplex! They lift TyranT up! But Smitten is here! He’s dived at both standing men caring little what happens to TyranT in the process! TyranT lands straight on his face! And both Striker and Derrick have been brought down by the champion!

Smitten begins to brawl against both the men as the ref once again fails to maintain control. Smitten quickly slams Derricks head against the mat before grabbing Striker, beginning to trade strikes with the man as both men climb to their feet. A solid kick to the stomach doubles the Abandoned Champion down however as Smitten sets Striker up for a pump handle slam, lifting him up before shifting him over his shoulder, looking to hit a big move.

Foxx: Smitten has Striker right where he wants him!

Stone: John Derrick! John Derrick just clotheslined Smitten whilst he has hold of Striker! And both men have been sent to the outside landing on each other. Striker and Smitten are outside of the ring. I’m not sure Derrick was suppose to send them both over as he looks at both downed men on the ground.

Foxx: TyranT has been standing behind Derrick for some time now having recovered from the botched double team move! He’s stalking Derrick!

Stone: But Derrick somehow knows he is there! He just span around and clobbered the former Abandoned Champion with a solid right hand! TyranT has spun around from the surprising strike, favouring his jaw! Derrick is off the ropes! TyranT is left wide open!

Foxx: TyranT spins around! He’s caught Derrick! The momentum is perfect! TyranT Slam! TyranT slam! TyranT has done it again in the name of deception!

Stone: Both men are down! But TyranT is slowly moving that arm of his to drape it over the chest of Derrick!

1...

Foxx: Here’s Striker! Goddamn it! He’s coming to make the save!

2...

Stone: No! Smitten has tripped him up from ringside and foiled his attempt! This could be it! C’mon Derrick flick out!

Three!

Christian G. Smitten and TyranT (8.23 aps - 0.1 penalty + 8.35 aps + 1.2 avs = 17.70 total)
Skyler Striker and John "Doc" Derrick (8.33 aps - 0.1 penalty + 8.15 aps - 0.3 penalty + 0.7 avs = 16.78 total)

Foxx: That’s it! TyranT and Smitten have done it! They’ve won the match!

Stone: The bell finalized the result! Smitten and TyranT have indeed won the match! Striker doesn’t look too pleased as TyranT drags himself up to his feet to celebrate as Smitten enters the ring with a look of satisfaction! That’s the second time Derrick has taken the fall in this partnership!

Foxx: Smitten coming in to join TyranT in a victory celebration! What a manoeuvre by Smitten there, just stopping Striker from making the save! For two future opponents, they’ve sure got some chemistry!

Stone: Definitely right... TyranT and Smitten are the victors tonight! The referee holding their hands up in the air, making sure Smitten is given his title! Well, I guess that’s all we-

TyranT goes to the turnbuckle to celebrate and motions for Smitten to follow. Smitten does so, raising his belt in the air, but while the FMW Champion is busy taunting the crowd, TyranT rolls out of the ring and snatches a chair, coming back in with surprising speed and cracking Smitten over the head with it.

Foxx: Chair shot! Chair shot! TyranT not merely happy with a victory here tonight, he wants Smitten down as well!

Stone: Look at that! He’s got the chair again, and he’s just smashed it over the back of Smitten’s head! TyranT, the number one contender at FMW Ultimatum, has just knocked the Full Metal Champion out!

TyranT drops the chair and stands over Smitten, picking up his golden belt. To a resounding chorus of boos, TyranT raises the belt in the air, standing tall over Smitten, until from behind, a blur of motion makes TyranT drop the belt.

Foxx: No! TyranT should be allowed to have his victory celebration without interruption!

Stone: Skyler Striker has sprinted into the ring, and the title belt is on the ground, Striker low blows TyranT from behind! He’s loading him up, and Striker has him in position! YES!

Foxx: Striker nails his finisher!

Stone: ‘For Love’ on Tyrant! He smashes TyranT's head on the title belt! Striker making a statement tonight! A small measure of revenge for Mount Vesuvius, which Striker looks to be feeling the effects of!

Foxx: He’s bruised and beaten, he should be at home resting, not assaulting people he has grudges with!

Striker kicks TyranT in the ribs to boot and then helps Derrick to his feet. Striker grabs a mic from ringside and looks to the staggering Derrick, but before he can say anything Derrick snatches the mic.

Doc: No talk. Listen. I’ve never needed anyone’s assistance in what I do, and this is precisely why. I respect you, Striker, but these tag matches have brought me nothin’ but agony. I don’t want or need them. You haven’t exactly been doing me favours. I need to get back to what brought me to this dance in the first place – myself. I rely on me and mine. No partnerships, no tag teams.

Skyler goes to grab the mic but Derrick pulls back, not yet done. The crowd boo this announcement of the partnership’s end.

Doc: I’ll wish you good luck. You probably won’t need it. But.

Doc pauses, still not fully recovered yet from the effects of Circus Maximus or of the match he has just participated in. Striker requests a mic from ringside but Derrick continues in the meanwhile.

Doc: But if it happens that we meet at Catalyst, kid – know that I will resort to anything and everything to get me back that shiny piece of metal. Even if I have to break your spirit to do it.

The crowd boo, not that Derrick pays heed to their call. Striker holds his hand up, apparently satisfied with Derrick’s comment before delivering his own.

Striker: I wouldn’t expect anything less from someone like you, John. But there comes a time when the student has to overtake the teacher. And after so long, I’ve discovered that that time? It’s NOW.

With a lightning quick move, Striker drops the mic and kicks John Derrick in the gut, to a roar of approval from the crowd. Within a few seconds, Striker hooks Derrick up and nails ‘For Love’, lifting the crowd off of their feet.

Stone: Holy shit! Skyler Striker has outsmarted Derrick here, and this partnership is definitely off! What a finisher from the Abandoned Champion!

Foxx: Derrick clearly has had enough of teaming up, but Striker may also agree with that sentiment!

Stone: Indeed! I’m Stone, this has been FMW Alchemy!

As the copyright info comes up, the final shot is that of Skyler Striker standing tall in the ring, Abandoned Championship in one hand, FMW Championship in the other, standing tall over Smitten, TyranT and Derrick.