FMW 2.1 - RESULTS

The ring is setup for Jarovision. “Mother” by Danzig is playing over the speakers and Jaro is already standing in the ring, with a microphone in hand.

Jaro: Can anybody guess what time it is?

The crowd screams, “TOOL TIME!”

Jaro: Wrong show, but good effort. And speaking of shows, what a show we have planned for all you. The Full Metal Championship is going to be defended for the first time, as Ethan Black is colliding with Adrian O’Rion! (crowd pops loudly). Ethan seems to think he pulled a fast one over me by picking the youngest O’Rion brother to defend the gold against. Well let me tell you something, I’ve gone drinking with those O’Rion boys and every damn one of them is completely off their rocker, and always looking for a fight. That said, I can drink any one of those faux-Nova Scotians under the table with my lower lip sawed off, but that is neither here nor there! TONIGHT, I’m gonna make sure we have a fair, knock-down, drag-out fight, because I am BANNING the Black Covenant and the O’Rion brothers from ringside! No foul play here tonight at Penn State University! (crowd pops for the stipulation, and even louder for the hometown mention)

Jaro: And one last thing, because I know you’re watching, old pal. Takeover, how’s it going? Sorry I popped your shoulder out of its socket at Death Row. I was looking forward to you being with us tonight. My Christmas card is in the mail, and should be arriving at your hospital bed any day now. I hope you get well soon. After all, I’m only halfway through the job. Your healthy shoulder is probably feeling a little left out. So here’s to a speedy recovery, and an even speedier second round of thrashing… courtesy of your friendly neighborhood Jaro.

The crowd roars with a “JARO! JARO!” chant.

Jaro: And since it is the season of giving, I thought I’d give you all a treat on Jarovision. Friends, Romans, countrymen… allow me to present to you… the Sadistic Santa… SYAAAAAANIIIIIIDE!

Soil's “HALO” starts playing. A bald, rather pissed off individual makes his way through the curtains. Syanide raises his hand at a crowd member as he passes by them on his way to the ring. He wrenches a microphone from Buster Cherry, and irritably stomps into the ring.

Jaro: Well Syanide, good to have you here. Although you don’t seem to be wearing that red cap and white beard I had prepared for you. No matter.

Now, it goes without saying that you are the most controversial wrestler on the roster. However, FMW is a federation that strives to bring its fans a diverse choice of wrestlers. We have African-Americans, Russians, Jewish wrestlers, homosexuals, Japanese, et cetera. But your whole shtick seems to involve belittling these superstars of different cultural backgrounds. You've even gone so far as to claim you want them wiped out of existence. My first question to you, which could be asked to any man who burdens a load of discrimination.. is WHY? What did these gents ever do to deserve such intense hatred?

Syanide: First of all, this isn’t a shtick! I’m not a fucking character, I’m real - I know that scares people - but I am. Why? Why do I hate these people? Its simple, these people… niggers, fags, Jews, are diluting the bloodline of the Aryan race. We grow weaker by the generation because of cross-breeding with these inferior races. Faggots like Showstoppa are single handedly wiping out the human race by spreading fucking AIDS.

The crowd boos Syanide loudly for his beliefs.

Syanide: You people can boo me but you know that I’m just saying what you all are too afraid to say. I am a Pure-Human, an Aryan Fighting Machine, and I am here to fix what is wrong with FMW one freak at a time.

Jaro: Hold the phone, Vinyard. Now, I'm not one to get into a philosophical debate, but did you just say that your own people are cross-breeding with these supposed "poisons"? If that's the case, don't you have your own people to hate on as well? After all, we can choose who we procreate with. If you're so focused on exterminating other races, why not slap some sense into your own first?

Syanide: Young people are foolish, only looking for someplace to stick their staff; they could care less if it was some flea-bitten nigger. But trust me, there are severe consequences for dating outside the species. The dilution happens to everyone. I’m sure you were Aryan once Jaro, until your bloodline was so clearly… tainted.

Jaro: Well yes, I’ve mixed and mingled with Halle Berry once or twice. But I’m not going to deny myself pumpin’ hot lead into some sweet ebony posterior - and possibly making itty bitty Jaro Berry babies - because I’m worried about my genetic make-up. That would just be silly. And you shouldn’t be worried about it either. It didn’t seem to me, Mr. Pure-Human, that your so-called “superior” genes could measure up to those of our African-American Ultraviolent Champion, War Machine at Death Row.

Syanide: My superior genes made it so that fucking nigger had to club me into a coma to finish me off. The fight shouldn’t have been stopped. I was on my feet minutes later, I walked out of the arena, I drove to the hotel, and I went to my hotel room and fucked a beautiful Aryan woman. Do those sound like the actions of someone who couldn't continue to fight? Next time I face War Machine he won't be so fucking lucky as to win by TKO. But before I claim what’s rightfully mine, I have some business to attended to with someone who’s been pissing me off the last few weeks, taking cowardly pot shots at The Aryan Fighting Machine. Dirty fuckin' Jew!

Jaro: Oh, don’t tell me. I can guess this. It’s coming to me… it’s coming to me. BILL GOLDBERG! You got beef with Bill Goldberg? Well ol’ whisker-biscuit isn’t here tonight, but the Rabbi certainly is! (crowd pops) You got anything else to say before I bring down the Rabbi out here and unleash the little Adolf Hitler inside of you? Any last words before the Rabbi comes down that ramp and brands the Star of David on your ass? (crowd pops even louder)

Syanide: I know that you think that somehow having the Rabbi confront me, much like he did at Death Row, will increase buyrates or something. Do you think people will wanna see a Neo-Nazi versus a Jew? (crowd pops again) But Jaro, this is real life! How do you think it'll affect buy-rates when I KILL THE RABBI!!! WHEN I HANG THE FREAK!!! (crowd boos loudly) Nobody is going to want to see that. Nobody is going to want to see the damage that I do to him… his dirty blood will stain my knuckles—

The Outsider hits the loudspeakers for a second, then the lights go out, there are scenes that appear on the MetalTron. The people of Germany burning pictures of Adolf Hitler. A declaration of peace between two Middle Eastern Leaders. A video clip of the Martin Luther King Jr. “I Have A Dream” speech. A picture is shown of a member of the Ku Klux Klan getting hung. Finally, the lights in the arena shut off as a picture of a menorah with Hanukkah candles is shown. The crowd is bubbling with anticipation and Syanide is furious in the ring. When the lights come on, Rabbi is standing in the middle of the ring!

Stone: RABBI! RABBI HAS ANSWERED THE CALL!

Phantom: Turn around, Syanide!

Syanide turns around into a stiff right hand from Rabbi. The two just start wailing on each other in the middle of the ring. Rabbi gets the upper hand after a sharp kick to the kidneys of Syanide. He lays out the right hands to Syanide and knocks him out of the ring as Jaro watches on, with a look of quiet intent. Rabbi rips the mic from Jaro’s hand.

Rabbi: You know Jaro, I’d love to stay and chat - and I’d love to get some cheap pops from this crowd with you - but what you’re seeing here isn’t nearly enough punishment!

Rabbi tosses the mic on the canvas, which makes a loud static sound, and then Rabbi follows the exhausted Syanide to the outside. Rabbi takes Syanide and throws him into the guardrail once, twice, but on the third time gets reversed. Rabbi’s back splatters up against the guardrail, giving Syanide a moment to recuperate. Syanide takes a pair of brass knuckles and delivers a skull-cracking shot, knocking the Rabbi out cold. Syanide, instead of following up on the wicked shot, decides to back away from Rabbi.

Stone: Rabbi might need some medical attention! And what the hell is Syanide doing now?

Phantom: God knows. He who learns to run away can live to fight another day?

Syanide hops over the guardrail. He moves up the stairs to the upper level seating, past a row of screaming fans before finally focusing in on one particular audience member.

Syanide: HEY RABBI! Oh RABBI! Look what I found! Your brother Daniel is here! He’s only twelve years old and is already well on his way to becoming a dirty fucking Jew, just like his big brother!

Jaro: Don’t fucking touch him, or I will fire your ass on the spot!

Syanide talks directly to Daniel

Syanide: Easy there boss, I’m not going to hurt him too much. (he begins to talk directly to Daniel) You Jews… you’re treacherous. You make people’s lives a living hell, you betray people without them even knowing! Well, I’m not going to allow another knife to be driven into my back. Kid, you’re nothing but a miserable bastard. A miserable bastard who deserves to suffer just like the rest of them. JUST LIKE THE REST OF THEM!

Rabbi begins to stir, looking towards Syanide and his brother. He frantically moves towards Syanide and his brother, but it’s too late. Syanide takes Dan and throws him violently down the concrete steps. Syanide laughs maniacally as Dan hits the steps one by one. Syanide’s expression changes, as Dan hits the last step with a sickening thud. With a look of shame and resentment for what he has done, Syanide hurries to the bottom of the steps and extends his hand to the child. As Dan reaches out, Syanide swats the hand down and then proceeds to stomp on Dan’s hand with his boot. Dan relinquishes blood-curdling screams.

Rabbi runs towards the scene, but is stopped by officials. Security grab hold of Syanide and viciously drag him down the stairs, and towards the exit.

Jaro: Get that fucking maniac out of my building! There’s no place on the roster for people like you!

There is a chorus of boos as Syanide is carted out of the arena; he flips off the fans, Rabbi, and Jaro as he leaves. Jaro and Rabbi hurry up towards Dan to lift him to his feet. There is a horrific gash across his fingers.

Jaro: Racist fucking bastard is going to cost me a fortune! And believe me, you have every right to sue. But I’ll tell you one thing, that’s the last time you will ever see Syanide in FMW.

Rabbi: NO! Jaro! Don’t fire him. He just made this way too personal, and I’m the one who needs to settle this. SYANIDE! Next time I see you, I will MURDER YOU! YOU’RE A DEAD MAN, SYANIDE!

Rabbi holds his brother’s head in his hands, as Jaro pages EMTs to arrive on the scene.

Stone: My God… I can’t believe what we’ve just witnessed here. Hopefully the poor kid gets medical attention quickly. We’ve got to take a quick break… Sick… absolutely sick….

Scene opens up to Flare wrapping tape around his wrists. Hostyle walks in.

Flare: Hey man. Que Pasa?

Hostyle: Nada. You feeling ready?

Flare: I think I'm cool.

Hostyle: A lot is riding on the line, mi amigo. You need to know that you're ready.

Flare: Yeah, I'm ready man. I know what you mean.

Hostyle: This is our chance.

Flare: I know man.

Hostyle: You know I'll have your back.

Flare: And if the roles were reversed, I'd have yours.

Hostyle: That's what makes us who we are. I just want to make sure you're ready.

Flare: I am, man.

Hostyle: Good. If you lose this, we may not get another shot.

Flare: I know man. I've got it.

Hostyle: Good.. Good.

Flare finishes wrapping up his wrists.

Flare: Alright man.. I'm ready.

Hostyle: Good.. I'll be watching, mi amigo.

Scene fades with Flare walking out.

The lights flicker back on from the opening pyro as a loud “FMDUB!” chant rips through the audience in the Bryce Jordan Center, two busty twins sporting Penn State jerseys focused in on by the camera. The two are seen making out as the camera changes to Phantom and Stone, Phantom staring at his monitor with his mouth agape.

Phantom: God bless America…

Stone: God Bless Her indeed! Welcome to another edition of Full Metal Wrestling! As you know, I’m Stone and my not so esteemed colleague here goes by the name Phantom Lord.

Phantom: I’m too in love to refute what utter non-sense just came out your mouth.

“Russian Roulette” by Tomayasu Hotei blares from the stadium speakers, matched by a swell of discontent from the fans as Red Dragon shows his face, stuffing his cue cards in the back of his trunks as he walked down the entrance ramp and entered the ring.

Cherry: Introducing First; from St. Petersburg, Russia and weighing in at an even 300 lbs – Nikolai “Red Dragon” Kafelnikov!

Stone: Well it seems like we’re starting things out right tonight as this will be a six man tag between the teams of Red Dragon, David Diabolical, and Lucas Drago versus the Significant Others – Diddly Fusion & Showstoppa and RAMPAGE! And Phantom, we should see a technical masterpiece this evening.

Phantom: Well I know I’m a happy man.

Stone: Why is that?

Phantom: Because the Champ is no longer Queer! That fruity fuck jobbed…excuse me…Showstopped his title to the hands of the true king of technical wizardary - Doctor David Diabolical! I’m like a kid in a candy store.

Stone: One of these days, we will be sued for your bigotry.

Phantom: Until then, I’ll continue to do me.

“SexyBack” by Justin Timberlake thumps with nauseating rhythmic timing as Drago makes his way down the entrance ramp, posing to allow what seems like droves of female fans screaming when he enters only to be booed by the male majority. He is ushered away by a venomous looking Andrew King who unanimously is booed as he threatens to smack away one of the fans.

Cherry: Hailing from Orange County, California, he weighs in at 250 lbs. Being accompanied by the “Esteemed” Andrew King he is LUCAS DRRAAAAAGO!

Phantom: Finally – the OC Superhero has come back to Penn State! All these low brow bushy slobs want to be him and all the women in here just want him. It reminds me of me in my younger days.

Stone: Be that as it may, one will have to question what the relationship between Lucas Drago and Andrew King is like after the events of Death Row where Lucas blamed his loss in the Road To Glory Tournament on King and proceeded to punch him as he left unceremoniously.

Phantom: That was just uh…a miscommunication between King and Drago. They have it running on all cylinders now like a well-oiled machine.

“The Great Gianna Sisters” by Machinae Supremacy roars to life with David Diabolical appearing at the top of the entrance ramp. Raising his C-4 Championship proudly in the sky, his entrance into the ring is serenaded by a requiem of booing. Exchanging pleasantries with Drago, King, and Dragon, he would hop to the top turnbuckle to hold his belt high in the air pelted with unkind jeers and taunts.

Cherry: And from Concord, New Hampshire, he weighs in at 197 lbs and is your C-4 Championnnn. Ladies and gentlemen – Doctor DAVID DIABOLICIAL!

Phantom: And thus we finally have a champion to be proud of. David Diabolical is a man of vast intelligence and cunning…wit and poise…grace and sty-

Stone: Will you shut the holy fuck up?

The lights dim, a purple spotlight turning on to the middle of the stage. As the crowd chants ‘Fear the Queer!’, “Holding Out For A Hero” begins to filter over the loudspeaker. Upon reaching the chorus, the arena implodes with bright florescent pink lighting, Showstoppa and Diddly Fusion appearing on stage. Showstoppa soaks in the noise from the crowd as Diddly looks at him mutinously from behind before they trek down the entrance ramp, entering the ring and causing the opposing team to scatter.

Cherry: Their opponents…weighing a combined weight of 408 lbs. They are Showstoppa and Diddly Fusion; the Significant Others!

Phantom: Before I get back down to business, if you ever speak to me in that manner again, I will remove your testicles and bring new meaning to “chestnuts roasting on an open fire”.

Stone: Bite me, Phantom.

Phantom: Whatever. But these fans can cheer for Showstoppa all they want but he’s no longer the Champion. He blew his load quicker than Old-John boy did over his face.

Stone: That’s vivid and disgusting imagery I hope to never partake in ever again.

“Get Back (Remix)” by Ludacris & Sum 41 is the last song to be heard. However, there is no pyro or fancy light display. It’s just RAMPAGE! walking down the stage ramp without posturing or posing – simply focus. The cheers of the fans seem unheard by the Blue Lightning who doesn’t even acknowledge Showstoppa and Diddly.

Cherry: And their partner…from Richmond, California, weighing 266 lbs. RAMPAGE!

Stone: Well that right there speaks volumes about RAMPAGE!’s mood and I can’t say that I’d be too pleased with myself after losing your shot at a world-class title like the Full Metal Championship.

Phantom: I must say he does look different tonight. However, different as he may look, he still doesn’t have the gold around his waist. That honor belongs to a personal friend of mine by the name of Ethan Black.

Stone: I was under the impression Ethan Black had no friends.

Phantom: Shows how much you know, n00bapottami.

Stone: Well let’s get this one underway and it looks like it will be RAMPAGE! starting it off against Lucas Drago, the two men who made it to the Elite Eight during Death Row but just couldn’t get past the O’Rions. We start with a lock up, Drago with the leverage due to his height advantage as he biel tosses RAMPAGE! to prove that not only is he eye candy but he also has strength!

Phantom: You’re a fag. You just said he was eye candy.

Stone: Call the damn match. RAMPAGE! is quick to get up and again, assert the lock-up, only to be pushed into No Man’s Land by Drago as both Red Dragon and Diabolical are closely watched by the referee who forces Drago to make the clean break only for Drago to show the ultimate disrespect and slap ‘Page in the face!

Phantom: This is why Lucas is handled by King – he’s a great competitor, he just ain’t too bright.

Stone: Finally – we agree. Drago may have made the mistake of a lifetime because he has just made RAMPAGE! angry. And in his own words, you won’t like him when he’s angry. With a stiff kick to the sternum, RAMPAGE! uses Drago’s lanky build to send him tumbling to the mat, a well placed hip toss earning Drago another trip and another before he tosses Drago into an adjasecent corner and unloads on him with furious combos to the chest, leveling the OC Superhero into a super-sized heap!

Phantom: ‘Page is going to have to curb his temper as the ref reminds him he can’t hit Drago in the face or it’s an automatic disqualification.

Stone: He doesn’t seem to care much as he clutches Drago by his hair and begins sending haymaker blows to the distinguished brow of Drago. You have to believe he’s venting some frustration from his loss to Andrew O’Rion.

Phantom: But Drago refuses to play helpless victim as he drop toeholds the ragamuffin into the ringpost and get the quick roll up!

Stone: HE’S USING THE ROPES AS SUPPORT! ONE TWO THR..RAMPAGE! POWERS OUT!

Phantom: I don’t know what match you were watching but it doesn’t matter as Drago lifts RAMPAGE! up and supports his heaftier frame with a beautiful stalling vertical Suplex. What power by this impressive young kid as he drives ‘Page to the mat! Another cover – oh so close!

Stone: Drago irish whips RAMPAGE! into hell once again, isolating him from both Showstoppa and Diddly as King barks orders at “The Man Who Makes Mirrors Orgasm” and would you look at that underhandedness! Drago distracts the ref as Red Dragon and David Diabolical choke RAMPAGE! against the turnbuckle and Showstoppa rightfully gets vocal about it, causing a three-way beat down for the Blue Lightning!

Phantom: Showstoppa’s just complaining because his tampon came loose. All I see is solid teamwork between three worker of solid character.

Stone: The gangland assassination by your three “solid characters” is downright shameful as Drago picks up the pieces to lock RAMPAGE! up once more and DAMN! RAMPAGE! has spinebustered Drago to the mat, sending the OC Superqueero into convulsions! With the roll-through, RAMPAGE! makes the hot tag to Showstoppa who comes in all fired up, delivering a double clothesline to Drago and DDD, and gives Red Dragon a little Tune!

Stone: And Showstoppa comes in and he is a house of fire!

Phantom: If, by that, you mean he's flamer, you'd be correct.

Stone: Anyway, Showstoppa takes Diabolical down with a clothesline. Dragon comes in and is taken down by spinning leg lariat by Showstoppa. Now the "O.C. Superstar" is in. Forearm by Show barely moves the big man. Another one has little effect. Roaring elbow! That staggered the big man. Show off the rope...another roaring elbow and Drago is teetering.

Phantom: But he still hasn't been knocked down.

Stone: But he wobbly and Showstoppa is going to the top. Missile dropkick and the big man is down.

Phantom: And Showstoppa's celebrating like he won Miss America! And the good doctor takes advantage, leveling Showstoppa with a clothesline from behind.

Stone: Now, Diabolical is raining down punches. Diabolical lifts him up for a slam but Showstoppa reverses it into a rollup...ONE...TWO...Diabolical kicks out! Diabolical's up...but Showstoppa sweeps his legs out from under him. Show kips up and nails a standing shooting star press. Another cover...ONE...TWO...Diabolical slips out again.

Phantom: He's resilient, that's why he's the champ.

Stone: Showstoppa is up and he is waiting for Diabolical to get to his feet. Diabolical is trying to get up...but a Queer Kick takes him back down. Now, Show picks him up...snap suplex take the C4 champ down.

Showstoppa picks Diabolical back up off the mat and sets him on the top rope. Showstoppa tries for a superplex but Diabolical blocks it. Diabolical then shoves Showstoppa off. Diabolical leaps off with a cross body press but at the last minute, Showstoppa nails him with another leg lariat.

Phantom: Did you see that!

Stone: Showstoppa managed a counter but both men are down. Show slowly puts a hand over Diabolical...ONE...TWO...Red Dragon breaks up the pin. And Diddly Fusion is in, attacking Red Dragon. And here comes Drago but RAMPAGE! cuts him off. And RAMPAGE! clotheslines Drago over the top rope! RAMPAGE! with a plancha takes out the big man! Now Diddly Fusion throws Dragon out of the ring. Fusion on the ring apron...running Somersault Senton off the apron!

Phantom: There is action everywhere, Stone! But looks like all that's left in the ring is the C4 Champion and the former champ!

Stone: And they've got issues to settle here tonight! Showstoppa with a roundhouse kick that misses! Diabolical sweeps the legs and goes for a cover...ONE...Show's out at one.

Phantom: Outside the ring, RAMPAGE! and Drago are fighting towards the locker room.

Show flips to his as Diabolical tries for another sweep but Showstoppa hops to avoid it. Showstoppa tries for a leg drop but Diabolical rolls out of the way but Showstoppa rolls back and flips into another legdrop that connects. Showstoppa then quickly wraps Diabolical up with a Magistral cradle.

Stone: La Magistral cradle...ONE...TWO...Diabolical reverses it...ONE...TWO...Show kicks out and immediately tries for a backslide...ONE...TWO...Diabolical is out. Now Diabolical with a small package...ONE...TWO...Show is out. This is C4 action at it's finest.

Phantom: This kind of fast paced action is what makes the C4 division the hottest in FMW.

Outside the ring Red Dragon lifts Diddly Fusion onto his shoulder and rams him head first into the ringpost.

Phantom: Diddly Fusion may no longer be factor in this match!

Stone: You may be right! Now, Diabolical tries for a clothesline but Show rolls under it. Diabolical is up and Showstoppa goes for the Showtune! But, Diabolical ducks under it. But there's Dragon and he nearly took Showstoppa's head off with the Russian Sickle!

Diabolical takes advantage by lifting Showstoppa up and hitting the Lethal Injection.

Phantom: Lethal Injection! If Show wasn't out by Dragon's lariat, he must be out now!

Stone: Diabolical with the cover...ONE...TWO...THREE!

Cherry: The winners of this match...LUCAS DRAGO, RED DRAGON AND DR. DAVID DIABOLICAL!

Diabolical, Dragon & Drago (4.20aps + 3.96aps + 3.92aps + 1.2avs = 13.28 Total)
RAMPAGE!, Showstoppa & Fusion (4.40aps + 3.63aps + 3.43aps + 1.0avs = 12.46 Total)

Scene opens up to Flare wrapping tape around his wrists. Hostyle walks in.

Flare: Hey man. Que Pasa?

Hostyle: Nada. You feeling ready?

Flare: I think I'm cool.

Hostyle: A lot is riding on the line, mi amigo. You need to know that you're ready.

Flare: Yeah, I'm ready man. I know what you mean.

Hostyle: This is our chance.

Flare: I know man.

Hostyle: You know I'll have your back.

Flare: And if the roles were reversed, I'd have yours.

Hostyle: That's what makes us who we are. I just want to make sure you're ready.

Flare: I am, man.

Hostyle: Good. If you lose this, we may not get another shot.

Flare: I know man. I've got it.

Hostyle: Good.. Good.

Flare finishes wrapping up his wrists.

Flare: Alright man.. I'm ready.

Hostyle: Good.. I'll be watching, mi amigo.

Scene fades with Flare walking out.

The lights flicker back on from the opening pyro as a loud “FMDUB!” chant rips through the audience in the Bryce Jordan Center, two busty twins sporting Penn State jerseys focused in on by the camera. The two are seen making out as the camera changes to Phantom and Stone, Phantom staring at his monitor with his mouth agape.

Phantom: God bless America…

Stone: God Bless Her indeed! Welcome to another edition of Full Metal Wrestling! As you know, I’m Stone and my not so esteemed colleague here goes by the name Phantom Lord.

Phantom: I’m too in love to refute what utter non-sense just came out your mouth.

“Russian Roulette” by Tomayasu Hotei blares from the stadium speakers, matched by a swell of discontent from the fans as Red Dragon shows his face, stuffing his cue cards in the back of his trunks as he walked down the entrance ramp and entered the ring.

Cherry: Introducing First; from St. Petersburg, Russia and weighing in at an even 300 lbs – Nikolai “Red Dragon” Kafelnikov!

Stone: Well it seems like we’re starting things out right tonight as this will be a six man tag between the teams of Red Dragon, David Diabolical, and Lucas Drago versus the Significant Others – Diddly Fusion & Showstoppa and RAMPAGE! And Phantom, we should see a technical masterpiece this evening.

Phantom: Well I know I’m a happy man.

Stone: Why is that?

Phantom: Because the Champ is no longer Queer! That fruity fuck jobbed…excuse me…Showstopped his title to the hands of the true king of technical wizardary - Doctor David Diabolical! I’m like a kid in a candy store.

Stone: One of these days, we will be sued for your bigotry.

Phantom: Until then, I’ll continue to do me.

“SexyBack” by Justin Timberlake thumps with nauseating rhythmic timing as Drago makes his way down the entrance ramp, posing to allow what seems like droves of female fans screaming when he enters only to be booed by the male majority. He is ushered away by a venomous looking Andrew King who unanimously is booed as he threatens to smack away one of the fans.

Cherry: Hailing from Orange County, California, he weighs in at 250 lbs. Being accompanied by the “Esteemed” Andrew King he is LUCAS DRRAAAAAGO!


Phantom: Finally – the OC Superhero has come back to Penn State! All these low brow bushy slobs want to be him and all the women in here just want him. It reminds me of me in my younger days.

Stone: Be that as it may, one will have to question what the relationship between Lucas Drago and Andrew King is like after the events of Death Row where Lucas blamed his loss in the Road To Glory Tournament on King and proceeded to punch him as he left unceremoniously.

Phantom: That was just uh…a miscommunication between King and Drago. They have it running on all cylinders now like a well-oiled machine.

“The Great Gianna Sisters” by Machinae Supremacy roars to life with David Diabolical appearing at the top of the entrance ramp. Raising his C-4 Championship proudly in the sky, his entrance into the ring is serenaded by a requiem of booing. Exchanging pleasantries with Drago, King, and Dragon, he would hop to the top turnbuckle to hold his belt high in the air pelted with unkind jeers and taunts.

Cherry: And from Concord, New Hampshire, he weighs in at 197 lbs and is your C-4 Championnnn. Ladies and gentlemen – Doctor DAVID DIABOLICIAL!

Phantom: And thus we finally have a champion to be proud of. David Diabolical is a man of vast intelligence and cunning…wit and poise…grace and sty-

Stone: Will you shut the holy fuck up?

The lights dim, a purple spotlight turning on to the middle of the stage. As the crowd chants ‘Fear the Queer!’, “Holding Out For A Hero” begins to filter over the loudspeaker. Upon reaching the chorus, the arena implodes with bright florescent pink lighting, Showstoppa and Diddly Fusion appearing on stage. Showstoppa soaks in the noise from the crowd as Diddly looks at him mutinously from behind before they trek down the entrance ramp, entering the ring and causing the opposing team to scatter.

Cherry: Their opponents…weighing a combined weight of 408 lbs. They are Showstoppa and Diddly Fusion; the Significant Others!

Phantom: Before I get back down to business, if you ever speak to me in that manner again, I will remove your testicles and bring new meaning to “chestnuts roasting on an open fire”.

Stone: Bite me, Phantom.

Phantom: Whatever. But these fans can cheer for Showstoppa all they want but he’s no longer the Champion. He blew his load quicker than Old-John boy did over his face.

Stone: That’s vivid and disgusting imagery I hope to never partake in ever again.

“Get Back (Remix)” by Ludacris & Sum 41 is the last song to be heard. However, there is no pyro or fancy light display. It’s just RAMPAGE! walking down the stage ramp without posturing or posing – simply focus. The cheers of the fans seem unheard by the Blue Lightning who doesn’t even acknowledge Showstoppa and Diddly.

Cherry: And their partner…from Richmond, California, weighing 266 lbs. RAMPAGE!

Stone: Well that right there speaks volumes about RAMPAGE!’s mood and I can’t say that I’d be too pleased with myself after losing your shot at a world-class title like the Full Metal Championship.

Phantom: I must say he does look different tonight. However, different as he may look, he still doesn’t have the gold around his waist. That honor belongs to a personal friend of mine by the name of Ethan Black.

Stone: I was under the impression Ethan Black had no friends.

Phantom: Shows how much you know, n00bapottami.

Stone: Well let’s get this one underway and it looks like it will be RAMPAGE! starting it off against Lucas Drago, the two men who made it to the Elite Eight during Death Row but just couldn’t get past the O’Rions. We start with a lock up, Drago with the leverage due to his height advantage as he biel tosses RAMPAGE! to prove that not only is he eye candy but he also has strength!

Phantom: You’re a fag. You just said he was eye candy.

Stone: Call the damn match. RAMPAGE! is quick to get up and again, assert the lock-up, only to be pushed into No Man’s Land by Drago as both Red Dragon and Diabolical are closely watched by the referee who forces Drago to make the clean break only for Drago to show the ultimate disrespect and slap ‘Page in the face!

Phantom: This is why Lucas is handled by King – he’s a great competitor, he just ain’t too bright.

Stone: Finally – we agree. Drago may have made the mistake of a lifetime because he has just made RAMPAGE! angry. And in his own words, you won’t like him when he’s angry. With a stiff kick to the sternum, RAMPAGE! uses Drago’s lanky build to send him tumbling to the mat, a well placed hip toss earning Drago another trip and another before he tosses Drago into an adjasecent corner and unloads on him with furious combos to the chest, leveling the OC Superhero into a super-sized heap!

Phantom: ‘Page is going to have to curb his temper as the ref reminds him he can’t hit Drago in the face or it’s an automatic disqualification.

Stone: He doesn’t seem to care much as he clutches Drago by his hair and begins sending haymaker blows to the distinguished brow of Drago. You have to believe he’s venting some frustration from his loss to Andrew O’Rion.

Phantom: But Drago refuses to play helpless victim as he drop toeholds the ragamuffin into the ringpost and get the quick roll up!

Stone: HE’S USING THE ROPES AS SUPPORT! ONE TWO THR..RAMPAGE! POWERS OUT!

Phantom: I don’t know what match you were watching but it doesn’t matter as Drago lifts RAMPAGE! up and supports his heaftier frame with a beautiful stalling vertical Suplex. What power by this impressive young kid as he drives ‘Page to the mat! Another cover – oh so close!

Stone: Drago irish whips RAMPAGE! into hell once again, isolating him from both Showstoppa and Diddly as King barks orders at “The Man Who Makes Mirrors Orgasm” and would you look at that underhandedness! Drago distracts the ref as Red Dragon and David Diabolical choke RAMPAGE! against the turnbuckle and Showstoppa rightfully gets vocal about it, causing a three-way beat down for the Blue Lightning!

Phantom: Showstoppa’s just complaining because his tampon came loose. All I see is solid teamwork between three worker of solid character.

Stone: The gangland assassination by your three “solid characters” is downright shameful as Drago picks up the pieces to lock RAMPAGE! up once more and DAMN! RAMPAGE! has spinebustered Drago to the mat, sending the OC Superqueero into convulsions! With the roll-through, RAMPAGE! makes the hot tag to Showstoppa who comes in all fired up, delivering a double clothesline to Drago and DDD, and gives Red Dragon a little Tune!

Stone: And Showstoppa comes in and he is a house of fire!

Phantom: If, by that, you mean he's flamer, you'd be correct.

Stone: Anyway, Showstoppa takes Diabolical down with a clothesline. Dragon comes in and is taken down by spinning leg lariat by Showstoppa. Now the "O.C. Superstar" is in. Forearm by Show barely moves the big man. Another one has little effect. Roaring elbow! That staggered the big man. Show off the rope...another roaring elbow and Drago is teetering.

Phantom: But he still hasn't been knocked down.

Stone: But he wobbly and Showstoppa is going to the top. Missile dropkick and the big man is down.

Phantom: And Showstoppa's celebrating like he won Miss America! And the good doctor takes advantage, leveling Showstoppa with a clothesline from behind.

Stone: Now, Diabolical is raining down punches. Diabolical lifts him up for a slam but Showstoppa reverses it into a rollup...ONE...TWO...Diabolical kicks out! Diabolical's up...but Showstoppa sweeps his legs out from under him. Show kips up and nails a standing shooting star press. Another cover...ONE...TWO...Diabolical slips out again.

Phantom: He's resilient, that's why he's the champ.

Stone: Showstoppa is up and he is waiting for Diabolical to get to his feet. Diabolical is trying to get up...but a Queer Kick takes him back down. Now, Show picks him up...snap suplex take the C4 champ down.

Showstoppa picks Diabolical back up off the mat and sets him on the top rope. Showstoppa tries for a superplex but Diabolical blocks it. Diabolical then shoves Showstoppa off. Diabolical leaps off with a cross body press but at the last minute, Showstoppa nails him with another leg lariat.

Phantom: Did you see that!

Stone: Showstoppa managed a counter but both men are down. Show slowly puts a hand over Diabolical...ONE...TWO...Red Dragon breaks up the pin. And Diddly Fusion is in, attacking Red Dragon. And here comes Drago but RAMPAGE! cuts him off. And RAMPAGE! clotheslines Drago over the top rope! RAMPAGE! with a plancha takes out the big man! Now Diddly Fusion throws Dragon out of the ring. Fusion on the ring apron...running Somersault Senton off the apron!

Phantom: There is action everywhere, Stone! But looks like all that's left in the ring is the C4 Champion and the former champ!

Stone: And they've got issues to settle here tonight! Showstoppa with a roundhouse kick that misses! Diabolical sweeps the legs and goes for a cover...ONE...Show's out at one.

Phantom: Outside the ring, RAMPAGE! and Drago are fighting towards the locker room.

Show flips to his as Diabolical tries for another sweep but Showstoppa hops to avoid it. Showstoppa tries for a leg drop but Diabolical rolls out of the way but Showstoppa rolls back and flips into another legdrop that connects. Showstoppa then quickly wraps Diabolical up with a Magistral cradle.

Stone: La Magistral cradle...ONE...TWO...Diabolical reverses it...ONE...TWO...Show kicks out and immediately tries for a backslide...ONE...TWO...Diabolical is out. Now Diabolical with a small package...ONE...TWO...Show is out. This is C4 action at it's finest.

Phantom: This kind of fast paced action is what makes the C4 division the hottest in FMW.

Outside the ring Red Dragon lifts Diddly Fusion onto his shoulder and rams him head first into the ringpost.

Phantom: Diddly Fusion may no longer be factor in this match!

Stone: You may be right! Now, Diabolical tries for a clothesline but Show rolls under it. Diabolical is up and Showstoppa goes for the Showtune! But, Diabolical ducks under it. But there's Dragon and he nearly took Showstoppa's head off with the Russian Sickle!

Diabolical takes advantage by lifting Showstoppa up and hitting the Lethal Injection.

Phantom: Lethal Injection! If Show wasn't out by Dragon's lariat, he must be out now!

Stone: Diabolical with the cover...ONE...TWO...THREE!

Cherry: The winners of this match...LUCAS DRAGO, RED DRAGON AND DR. DAVID DIABOLICAL!

Diabolical, Dragon & Drago (4.20aps + 3.96aps + 3.92aps + 1.2avs = 13.28 Total)
RAMPAGE!, Showstoppa & Fusion (4.40aps + 3.63aps + 3.43aps + 1.0avs = 12.46 Total)

The shot opens to show Ranger Joe and Woodchuck standing backstage. Next to them stand both Alex O’Rion and Drew Michaels.

Woodchuck: I am standing here with the co-winners of the first ever Full Metal Debate, Alex O’Rion and Drew Michaels. The stipulation for the winners was they are given a choice of any match they want so long as it takes place before or at the next Pay Per View.

We were just given word by General Manager Jaro that you have both reached a decision on when and what your matches will be. Alex, you first, what are you going to do with your free match.

Alex: As everyone knows, my bro Adrian won the pick your poison match at Death Row to become the number one contender for the Ultraviolent Championship. And my brother Andrew is one of if not the front-runner for a shot at Ethan Blacks title after the heart breaking loss at the same pay per view.

But where does that leave me? Am I supposed to just play the part of the other O’Rion, the one who supports my brothers while I fall behind? That is not who Alex O’Rion is, and I am going to prove it at 2.3 in one of the two main events.

There is a title that seems to be getting left behind, forgotten, and over looked by most people. The C-4 Championship, the wrestlers championship. At 2.3 I am going to bring back to the C-4 what it has been missing, I am going to bring back that exciting wrestling that can be just as damned entertaining as any fuckin’ chair shot. At 2.3 the C-4 will begin again when I beat Dr. David Diabolical in a submission match to show just what the C-4 champion, and the C-4 division itself are supposed to be about!

Woodchuck: Alex, you mentioned one of the two main events at 2.3, your saying there will be more than one?

Drew: I can answer this one; Alex wasn’t the only one to win the debate. I too have decided to cash my guaranteed match at 2.3 in the other of the main events.

Ethan Black has established his evil as the top of the FMW thus far, and I have been sent on a mission by the lord to bring him down and show the world what a true champion and hero can do. But Mr. Black is crafty, he knows he cannot stand before my mission alone, so he has built himself a tower to stand atop, a tower made of his followers.

Any good attacker knows that the easiest way take down a tower is to remove the base; in this case his Black Covenant needs to be dismantled piece by piece.

At 2.3 I plan to begin to burn the bottom of his tower, by burning his follower War Machine when I take the Ultraviolent Championship away from him in an Inferno match!

And when I am done then the challenging of Ethan Black by myself and the other good-hearted people of this locker room can begin.

Alex and Drew walk away from the interview as Woodchuck turns to the camera.

Woodchuck: You heard it here first folks, both the C-4 Championship and the Ultraviolent championships will be up for grabs come 2.3. Stone, Phantom.

Cut back to the ring where Buster Cherry is standing in the middle of the ring.

Cherry: The following match-up is scheduled for one fall and it is a Triple-Threat Match to determine the Number One Contender for the Full Metal Tag Team Championships!

Introducing first…

“Lake of Fire” by Nirvana begins, Magus Flare pushing his way past the stage curtains with a cheesy grin on his face. Wearing a t-shirt with the words “Don’t Hate; Innovate” emblazoned on his chest, he is met with a wave of nearly unanimous disapproval to which he seems all but oblivious to.

Cherry: From St. Louis, Missouri and weighing in at 215 pounds; Magus FLARE!

Stone: Welcome back to Full Metal Wrestling and, if you are just tuning in, this next match-up will determine who will face Korran Haylcon and Sublime– the SoCal Connection for their tag team championships at our next big pay per view Lethal Injection.

Phantom: Here’s a question for you, Stone.

Stone: Yeah partner?

Phantom: Say Sublime wins this match – does he challenge himself for his own belt?

Stone: Well you see, Phantom…I have…no..fucking idea.

Phantom: Wow. What about those damn near mystical sources of yours?

Stone: They seem to be..erm..unreliable in this instance.

Phantom: Well perhaps this is something we have to bring up with the head honcho. In any case, I don’t like anything about these Dangerous By Design clowns. Both of them are disrespectful little maggots that aren’t fit to perform with a company such as Full Metal.

Stone: Phantom. Normally you’re one who commends people for bucking the authority and causing some noise.

Phantom: You’re right but these over-pretentious little cuntrags were shitty guests on Take 5 this week.

Stone: Last time, you were openly bashing Showstoppa but now you’re going as far as defending him?

Phantom: Fuck no! The little shits interrupted MY airtime to whore themselves out faster than Brittney Spears filing for a divorce.

The lights dim, an excited tremor rumbling throughout the arena. As someone over the loudspeaker bellows “It ain’t manslaughter; It’s Homicide”, the crowd begins to cheer. The lights return when “Infected” by Bad Religion is the next theme to be heard, Homicide knee lifting through a red fog as he warms himself up for his upcoming match, running down the entrance ramp and sliding past the bottom rope, sending Flare scurrying away like vermin, putting his index finger up to his temple to indicate he’s smarter than Homicide who stares down his opponent with a fierce intensity.

Cherry: And from Sydney, Australia. He weighs in at 210 lbs. He-Is-HOMICIDE!

Phantom: The Soldier of Fortune meets The Schizophrenic Porn Addict. Great. All we need is for Flare to toss some wrinkled ones at this cheap bastard so we can watch a match of grab ass the entire night.

Stone: I think there are some limits even Homicide is not willing to cross. Besides, this could mean tag team gold for James McDaygo and himself. He wouldn’t jeopardize something that is worth more than money.

Phantom: If this is some long winded rant about the value of respect that comes with winning a championship, I don’t fucking want to hear it. All that matters is getting paid and getting laid.

Stone: You’ve been hanging around Mac Deezy again, haven’t you?

Phantom: Hey the man knows how to throw a party, alright?

“Calm Like a Bomb” by Rage Against The Machine is the last song to be heard. Sublime makes his entrance, met with a mixed reaction. Sublime looks out into the crowd before hoisting the Full Metal Tag Team Championship into the air with a smooth repugnance on his face.

Cherry: Hailing from Santa Monica, California and weighing in at 242 lbs. He is the Prophet of the Burning Shore and one half of the Full Metal Tag Team Champions; The Sublime!

Phantom: And here’s the money man right here. He is indeed Calm like a Bomb. Look here, Flare! Here’s a true innovator seeing as he doesn’t have to resort to a publicity stunt to get recognition enough for the Tag Championships!

Stone: Sublime is indeed the champion as well as Karren..

Phantom: Korran!

Stone: Yes yes…forgive me. Korran Holycan. (snicker)

Phantom: Well seeing as Stone is all shits and giggles, it looks as though I’ll have to call this match. As we get this started, our three competitors square off with each other.

Stone: Ouch. Only for Sublime to be met with a superkick in the jaw by Homicide who transitioned it into a roundhouse to connect with Flare and send them both sprawling. It looks like Homicide’s training at the hands of RAMPAGE! have paid off.

Phantom: You spoke too soon, Stone. Flare, with opportunistic uncreativity, chop blocks Homicide in the leg.

Stone: And for his sudden attack on both Flare and Sublime, he is met with heels to the face by the two enraged competitors.

Phantom: Well this is how you start these sorts of matches off – find a person to align with momentarily so that you can focus on one person and weary him. But if I know Sublime, I do believe he’ll allow for Flare to do most of the work.

Stone: Why’s that?

Phantom: Simple; it’s the old rope a dope trick. You allow for your opponents to tire each other out so you can vulture what’s left. I’ve done it a few times in my day and let us say I gave Sublime a few pointers on how to execute this planning effectively.

Stone: Underhanded but effective I must say and it seems as if the Sublime is heading your advice as he is directing Flare to deliver an inverted atomic drop modification into a sit out powerbomb. With this unique maneuver, Sublime goes aerial to drive his elbow right into Homicide’s Adam’s Apple!

Phantom: Flare doesn’t seem done yet with his…shall we say oddball offense as he lifts Homicide back up to his feet only for him to be knocked back down like a bowling pin.

Stone: It seems the Sublime/Flare tandem is focusing on the upper torso of Homicide where a majority of his offense rests. That wicked cool hip toss backbreaker variant is testament to that.

Phantom: “Wicked cool”? Are you like six?

Stone: STFU Newb. The Sublime is up next as he gives Homicide the old Alley oop leaving him laid out on the mat canvas as Homicide’s neck snaps with vicious whiplash from the impact from that drop!

Phantom: Flare, not one to take chances, takes a short but smart drop kick to the small of Homicide’s back! Maybe I prejudged this little black sheep a bit harshly.

Stone: You’re more wishy-washy than John Kerry.

Meanwhile, Homicide is being dominated by The Sublime and Flare. Flare lifts Homicide into vertical Suplex position to toss him into his groin onto the top turnbuckle!

Phantom: And with a running missile dropkick from Subby, it looks like Homicide’s sperm count has just been lowered a peg. Haha…Sara won’t be happy. Then again, with a retarded fuck like that, who would be?

Stone: Perhaps you will enlighten me as to who Sara is in the future but Flare is now on the top rope to perhaps surprise us and does a picture perfect asai moonsau-no! Homicide, after being brutalized by the Sublime and Flare, had the ring presence to lift his knees and drive them into Flare’s sternum!

Phantom: But Sublime quickly puts a stop to any possible offense that Homicide could muster as he is greeted with a spinning neckbreaker! Beautimous, mon capitain!

Stone: Well your torrid French aside, Sublime isn’t releasing Homicide, turning the neckbreaker into a triangle choke hold to slowly drain the life from Homicide. But an angered Flare begins to boot the holy hell out of the already fading Homicide. Sublime obviously doesn’t appreciate this and gets in Flare’s face about it.

Phantom: I stand corrected in my earlier amendment; Magus Flare is a fucking dumbass! Punch his lights out, Sublime. This clown is just batshit crazy.

Stone: Before Sublime can voice his dismay at Flare, Flare launches against the ropes and hits a shining wizard! His knee connected with Homicide’s temple and there’s sure to be brain damage!

Phantom: No one will notice, I assure you.

Stone: And now, Flare is applying the triangle choke, twisting and writhing like a snake to torque that singled out throat and upper back of Homicide’s. Look at that shit-eatting grin spreading across his face! He’s enjoying putting Homicide through this agony.

Phantom: What in the holy fuck…is he..talking to himself?

Stone: Well Sublime certainly has had enough of this nut job’s antics as he grasps Flare by his hair much to the delight of the audience. With his superior size, Sublime sends Flare FLYING with a tiger Suplex, causing their dark alliance to be broken.

Phantom: Air Flare pulls a Cory Lidel and it ain’t looking pretty.

Stone: Have you no fucking heart? The man is dead for Christ’s sake!

Phantom: Hey. There are two things certain in this life; death and those that find humor in it. I am one of those people.

Stone: You’ll have to excuse my partner’s lack of tact, folks. While we’re being sued, can we please just call the match?

Phantom: Call away!

Stone: Sublime has now directed his frustrations on Flare who is being met with a fist and a urnage. With a sudden transition, Sublime lifts Flare back up to his feet and gives him a Russian Leg Sweep for his trouble.

Phantom: What a champ! What an icon! What a hero!

Stone: Shut up, Phantom. Sublime has latched on to Flare’s arm and is dragging him across the ring to toss him into the ringpost. And with the reversed irish whip, Sublime damn near separates Flare’s shoulder by sending him full throttle into the metal!

Phantom: I wouldn’t mind in the slightest if Sublime put that freakazoid out of commission permanently.

Stone: With this slow, well placed maneuver, Sublime then heads up the turnbuckle, placing Flare’s arm between the metal ring holding the ropes and the post itself. With a banzai drop, Sublime probably HAS severed the continuity between Flare’s arm and his shoulder.

Phantom: Sublime, with ruthless intent..shit I don’t believe it.

Stone: But I do! Homicide is up and back, baby! With a flying arm lariat, he nails Sublime in a lower back and gets him in a pin predicament! It could all be over here one two-!! Flare breaks the count with a slap to Homicide’s face.

But wait! As Flare went in to grab the stunned Homicide, he got that damn red mist in the eyes! The ref never saw it! With a dropsault square in Flare’s face and another pin attempt HE – NO! Sublime catches Homicide in the head with a boot!

Phantom: Damn ref is biased. He wants Sublime to lose in this one.

Stone: The fact that Sublime has yet to pin has nothing to do with it I’m assuming?

Phantom: None at all.

Stone: Now Sublime is on the offense, trading punches with Homicide who was upset by the sudden blindsiding by Sublime. However, the crafty Flare lands a perfect springboard crossbody, taking out both men. It doesn’t seem the crazy bastard is done because he rebounds off the ropes to supply a Rolling Thunder splash to both of them! And Flare with the hook of Sublime’s leg who powers out a 2.9999!

Flare has to be asking himself what other devilish things he can invent to take out both Homicide and Sublime. But mainly it appears his mark is Homicide who he is dragging by his hair out of the ring and tossing to the cement floor below.

Phantom: It appears that one of the self-proclaimed innovators of style has had his share of playing fair. I don’t think this retard even knows he’s in a match any longer.

Stone: Flare has the chair and he’s lifting to strike Homicide square in the head but springboarding from the top rope is Sublime who he vanquishes with a stunning display of grace and alacrity!

Phantom: Here’s a question, Stone; if I’m the champ…why would I not want potential challengers to my belt to beat each other into disqualification rather than just lick my wounds and walk away?

Stone: It seems you don’t know Sublime as well as you thought you did. Sublime tosses Flare back into the ring for some payback and as he comes back on the rebound, lets him visit a patented tilt-a-whirl slam. Wrapping around his throat, he lifts Flare back up to apply a sleeper hold to ware his opponent down and win this with a choke out submission.

Phantom: I do know Sublime well enough to estimate he’s making them slow their pace down to his chilled level. The champ keeps things at a nice, even pace to dictate how he wants things done.

Stone: Too true. Things aren’t going very well for Flare who is fadin-JESUS CHRIST!

Phantom: You scream like a little bitch at the most minor things!

Stone: MINOR THINGS?! SUBLIME COULD HAVE BROKEN FLARE’S NECK WITH THAT BACK CRACKER! HE HAD THE FUCKING MATCH WON!

Phantom: Well…it is Flare.

Stone: You heartless…wait…you’re right. It’s Flare.

Phantom: To quote Rush Hour; “They don’t like you, I don’t like you…the girl don’t like you – no body likes you.”

Stone: Harsh. And Sublime gets up after that vicious backcracker transition move. I have no idea what to quite call that but it appears Sublime has added something new to his repertoire. His gloating is short lived, however, as Homicide charges towards him to thrust into his midsection with his spear! Homicidal Intent! Homicidal Intent! The follow up is a beautiful Standing Shooting Star Press with the cover! THIS IS IT! ONE! TWO!! THR-AND FLARE WITH THE SAVE!

Phantom: How the hell isn’t Flare paralyzed? He should be Christopher Reeves right about now.

Stone: What is with you making tactless dead jok-you know what, nevermind. Flare is setting up the dazed Homicide for his unique finisher – Missionary Position…AND HOMICIDE rolls out of the set-up to send Flare into the Sublime!

Phantom: Homicide slowly makes his way up top – Jesus I can’t watch.

Stone: And Homicide hits the Candygram on Flare who convulses as his sternum must be caved in from that shot!

Phantom: Oy vey…what is Sublime doing? Stay on the ground and play possum you idiot!

Stone: Homicide has Sublime in his clutches now and delivers him a bone rattling H-5! That spine splitting fireman's carry facebuster planted The Sublime into the ground! But Homicide won’t release! He’s locked Sublime into the 4:21!

Phantom: Sublime needs to get to the ropes! Don’t give up you useless sack of shit!

Stone: Annnd…he’s done it! Homicide wins! Homicide wins! The Sublime has submitted to the 4:21!

Cherry: Here is your winner – HOMICIDE!

Homicde (4.60aps + 1.5avs = 6.10 Total)
The Sublime (4.43aps + 0.8avs = 5.23 Total)
Flare (4.02aps + 0.3avs = 4.32 Total)

Homicide gets up and celebrates, raising both hands triumphantly in the air before rummaging in his shorts. With that, he procures two cards, placing both on his two fallen foes chests before rolling beneath the bottom rope and walking up the entrance ramp as the shot fades to black.

The scene fades from black to show Jackie Test, G.L.S. and Brody McBrayer sitting in a locker room in the back.

Test: I think it's great Brody that you have decided to join our campaign to correct the state of wrestling as we see it today.

McBrayer: It’s a pleasure to be a part of this. Like the two of you, I’m not happy with the state of wrestling today. There’s hardly any wrestling anymore. It’s all “let’s hit each other with trash cans.” That’s not wrestling at all.

GLS: I completely agree, Brody. That’s why we’re here and that’s why we’ve asked you to join our cause.

McBrayer: Together we’ll make a difference and completely revolutionize the way that we see wrestling. We’ll take it back to the good ole days when people actually wrestled.

Test: You’ve got that right. Tonight we’re starting with those damned O’Rion brothers.

GLS: Oh, how I hate them.

McBrayer: They’re nothing but a plague on this business.

Test: They think that they know what wrestling is but as we’ll teach them tonight, they don’t know a single thing.

GLS: We’re going to take those two punks to school!

Test: They’ll quickly learn what The Revolution and The Trinity are all about.

GLS: To the revolution!

McBrayer: To The Trinity!

The three raise their hands into the air as the scene fades to black.

Buster Cherry walks into the ring with a microphone in hand.

Cherry: The following match is scheduled for one fall...

“When Worlds Collide” by Powerman 5000 begins to play as Loki steps out onto the ramp and begins walking to the ring to a chorus of boos from the crowd.

Cherry: Making his way to the ring, from Long Beach, California. He weighs in tonight at an astonishing 295 lbs. This is Looooooooooooooooooooooooooki.

Phantom: Who is this guy? I didn’t think Cherry should’ve told us how much he weighs and where he’s from, I think he should’ve just told us his Win/Loss record. That would sum up Loki’s prestigious career.

Stone: Seems like you have a bit of a problem with him tonight Phantom.

Phantom: I don't have a problem with him, my wallet however does.

Stone: What are you talking about?

Phantom: I made a few bets here and there, I was told Loki couldn't lose, but you probably know how it all turned out. Long story short, if I don't give them the money by Friday my puppy gets it.

Stone: I didn’t know you were a dog person.

Loki steps into the ring and looks towards the ramp for Orochi. Suddenly the lights all go out as “Beyond The Wasteland” begins to play in full swing. The lights flash back on and Orochi is standing right behind Loki.

Phantom: Turn around you idiot!

Stone: I don't think he can here you Phantom.

Phantom: Nonsense, we are broadcasted into millions of homes around the country.

Stone: No but he still cant here you.

Phantom: Why must you make me feel so stupid?

Loki still looks towards the ramp, Orochi runs backwards, bounces off the ropes and comes back with a huge dropkick into the spine of Loki. Loki falls forward and Orochi begins to stomp his body.

Stone: Orochi has started the match in complete control, which is impressive considering that he is only 5’11 and weighs 212 lbs.

Phantom: How do you know these things?

Stone: Oh Jaro got me to run the FMW website and I had to make all the profiles.

Phantom: Where would I find such an informative website?

Stone: Its quite easy, just go to fmw.cjb.com and you will be able to join the Zuzu fan club and look up information on your favorite FMW superstars, like Takeover, everyone loves Takeover.

Phantom: Get back to calling the match, Orochi is doing something.

Orochi begins to slowly lift Loki back to his feet. Orochi chops Loki and then Irish Whips him against the ropes. Orochi then tries to connect with a Roundhouse Kick but Loki merely catches his foot in his hand.

Stone: And that is a solid example of the strength of Loki, this man is one of the strongest FMW competitors and he definitely uses it to his advantage.

Phantom: Well he had better hurry up and win so I will have some money to pay off my debts with.

Stone: Don't tell me you bet on the outcome of this match as well.

Phantom: Fine I won’t tell you.

Loki throws Orochi’s leg to the ground and then picks him up and effortlessly throws him into the corner. Loki then runs towards him and connects with a heavy shoulder tackle into the turnbuckle.

Stone: Now this is the part where Loki becomes most dangerous, it’s when he has the ability to keep his opponent down and just keep hitting away at them.

Phantom: Yeah, but he still manages to blow it all the time.

Stone: Yeah, but this may be the beginning of the end of Loki’s losing streak. Loki just needs to keep Orochi grounded so that he can avoid Orochi’s speedy assaults.

Loki grabs Orochi by the head and begins to bash his skull against the turnbuckle. Orochi grabs the ropes and the ref begins his five count. Loki lets go just before the count of five and he then pokes Orochi in the eye.

Phantom: Whoa, the night is only young and we’re already seeing some underhanded techniques. This is what I pay for.

Stone: You don't pay for anything; you get this seat to commentate.

Phantom: Doesn't make my statement any less true.

Stone: What?

Loki then drags Orochi to the center of the ring and picks him up vertically for a suplex. Orochi slips out of it though and he begins to fight back by peppering Loki with a barrage of kicks and chops to the stomach.

Phantom: This guy works harder than the Mexicans I hired to mow my lawn.

Stone: You’re a terrible man.

Phantom: Hey it’s not as though anyone cares about my opinions on the Mexicans.

Stone: Well you’d be wrong there as one of our biggest viewing demographics is the Latino Nation.

Phantom: Oh Shit.

Stone: You can’t say that either, you are gonna get us into so much trouble with the FCC.

Phantom: Fuck the FCC.

At that exact moment a man in a business suit with a briefcase begins to run down the ramp towards Phantom and Stone. The man takes a seat next to Phantom and puts a set of headphones on.

Phantom: Who the hell are you?

Guy: I’m Chad Turner of the Federal Communications Commission. You’re commentary has been classified as “Highly Offensive” I’ve been sent in to censor your remarks.

Stone: Can we please get back to calling the match?

Turner: Yes, yes we can.

Stone: And Orochi is still in control of the match. Orochi with a hard kick to the legs of Loki and now he’s down to one knee.

Orochi bounces off the ropes and connects with a vicious Shining Wizard to the head of Loki which his follows with a cover.

Stone: One, Two.....No. Kickout by the powerful Loki and he’s still in this match, what do you think Phantom?

Phantom: Well, I think that Loki should stop fucking....

Turner: NO SWEARING!

Phantom: Fine, I think Loki should get his mind into the game and concentrate on keeping Orochi grounded so he doesn't have to face the speed of Orochi.

Stone: I think that’s the longest, most intelligent sentence to ever come from your mouth.

Phantom: Well it might be me turning over a new leaf or it might be the fact that this monkey in a suit has a gun to my stomach.

Turner: I have done no such thing...*whispering*Keep talking the way you are and you die.

Orochi pulls Loki back to his feet and begins to beat away at him once more with chops and kicks but Loki manages to catch one of the chops and force Orochi back into the corner. Loki lifts Orochi up into the corner and then begins to punch him in the face. After he finisher he steps down and picks Orochi up in a Military Press position.

Phantom: This could be a healthy Drop of Cyanide for his opponent.

Stone: How can Cyanide be healthy for anyone?

Turner: You can’t mention poison on TV, it might give children ideas.

Stone: So what the hell are we gonna call this move then?

Turner: Hmmmm, how about Drop of Love.

Phantom: Drop of Love? DROP OF LOVE? Are you fucking serious? Never in all my years have I ever heard something that shit ever mentioned inside a wrestling arena.

Turner: Well if you won’t comply with the FCC’s request then we will have to cancel your show.

Phantom: Oh yeah? Well you guys at the FCC can take your requests, shine em up nicely and shove them....

Stone: Shut up Phantom. Fine we will listen to your requests.

Turner: Good.

Loki connects with the Drop of Cyanide on Orochi. Loki then covers him.

Stone: That’s a Drop of...Love with a cover. One, Two......Nooo. Orochi managed to kick out and Loki does not look happy with it. What's he doing?

Loki picks Orochi up in another Military Press but this time he throws him outside the ring. The ref walks over to the ropes and begins to count to ten while Loki pulls off the covers of the turnbuckles.

Stone: Turn around ref, look what Loki’s doing.

Phantom: I thought they couldn't here us. Whose the idiot now Stone?

Turner: You can’t say idiot, it’s insensitive to those with disabilities. A recommended substitute is Silly.

Phantom: *sigh* Fine, you’re a very silly man Stone.

Orochi makes it back to his feet at the ref’s count of seven. By the count of nine Orochi is back in the ring. Loki tries to grab Orochi but he slides under his legs and then dropkicks him in the spine again. Orochi then whips Loki into the corner and then Monkey Flips him into the centre of the ring.

Stone: Nice Monkey Flip from the Oriental Assassin. Every time it seems that Orochi is going to succumb to the strength of Loki he just comes and fights back.

Phantom: To steal from my WWE equivalent. Orochi is like Herpes, he just doesn't go away.

Turner: You can’t say Herpes on TV Mr. Lord. You can say STD but not Herpes.

Phantom: You FCC have the most idiotic rules.

Turner: The silliest rules Mr. Lord, the silliest rules.

Orochi steps up onto the top rope and aims his sights at Loki who is lying in the middle of the ring.

Stone: Orochi looks ready to fly, what will he use on Loki now?

Phantom: It could be anything Stone.

Orochi flies off with a huge Elbow Drop with his elbow landing right in the heart of Loki which is followed by a cover.

Stone: AMAZING ELBOW DROP FROM THE TURNBUCKLE! Loki’s heart probably skipped a beat from that one, this could be the end of the match right here. One, Two.....KICK OUT! How can he keep this up? How can Loki keep kicking out of these moves?

Phantom: Loki knows that if he loses there is gonna be a very poor and angry Phantom waiting for him in the carpark.

Turner: You can’t imply violent actions Phantom.

Phantom: Why not!? This is a wrestling show; this whole show is designed to be violent. You can’t have a wrestling show without violence.

Turner: I was actually meaning to talk to you about that....

Orochi picks Loki up and him into the corner. Orochi tries to drive Loki’s head into the exposed steel but Loki keeps powering out of it. Orochi tries a third time but Loki stays strong. Loki then pokes Orochi in the eyes and moves out of danger.

Stone: Quick thinking by Loki to stay away from that exposed steel.

Phantom: This match has been so back and forth, one of these guys should maybe try a finishing maneuver.

Loki forces Orochi into the corner and begins to relentlessly slam him into the exposed steel. Loki then takes a few steps back into the middle of the ring and then runs towards Orochi. Orochi however, drops to the ground and manages to Drop Toe Hold Loki into the exposed steel opening a gash in his head. Loki stumbles around the ring stunned from the pain.

Stone: Amazing counter by Orochi, he seems to be signaling for something.

Phantom: I hope its his version of throwing in the towel because that’s the only way Loki can win at this point.

Orochi stands in the middle of the ring and signals towards Loki. Loki blindly stumbles towards Orochi and Orochi picks Loki up and nails him with the Kusanagi in the middle of the ring which he follows with a pin.

Stone: It’s all over now, One, Two, and Three. Orochi picks up his first victory in FMW and it looks like Loki’s losing streak is forced to continue.

Cherry: And your winner, via a pinfall. OOOOOOOOrochi.

Orochi (3.62aps + 1.3avs = 4.92 Total)
Loki (3.56aps + 0.9avs = 4.46 Total)

Stone: So do you have any opinions on the match Phantom?

Phantom: I would love to comment but I am pretty sure that’s my Loan shark walking down the ramp towards us.

Phantom’s Loan Shark walks down the ramp towards the commentating table. He sees Phantom and aims his gun towards him. He fires off the pistol but he misses and instead he hits FCC Executive Chad Turner, killing him instantly. The Loan Shark then runs off.

Phantom: Whoa that was lucky.

Stone: What should we do with the body?

Phantom: Let’s just slide it under the table here and not mention this moment again. Ever.

Stone: Good idea Phantom.

The ref holds Orochi’s hand up in victory and once more the lights all go out. As the lights go back on Orochi is nowhere to be seen and there is one less person at the announcer table.

We open to find Infinity and Mac Deezy sitting atop a cherry coated ’62 Chevy Impala, the chrome rims glistening as they rotated at a slow pace. With a cigar in mouth and a feathered fedora pulled over his eyes, Mac Deezy lounged atop the car with a woman of indeterminate origins on either side. Infinity quickly gets off the hood of the car, a bottle of Remy Martin in gloved hand as he took a strong swig.

Infinity: Whut’s good folk? This ya boy, ya nig, ya cuzzo ‘Nity reppin’ them Hoodstarz, ya dig? See me and my nezzie who fuck dem breezies by the name of Mac Deezy ain’t findin’ shit in FMW too easy, ya ‘eard?

Mac Deezy snaps as the two women tend to him, removing his hat, coat, and cigar while managing to help him rise to his feet. Extending his hand expectantly, an immaculate diamond encrusted cane is thrust into his open palm. With a strolling limp, he stands beside his compatriot, the women placing themselves on either side of the two men.

Mac Deezy: What my nigga Infinity means to say is that these jive ass suckas aren’t givin’ the Hoodstarz we deserve. All we is is the common man tryin’ ta make somethin’ out of nothin’.

Infinity: Stayin’ on that scrilla and gettin’ that Monopoly cheese.

Mac Deezy: And you, as my fellow American-

Woman #1: We’re in Canada, Daddy-sir.

Mac Deezy would hold up his hand to silence the woman, his head turning slowly to face the woman, staring at her with absolute abhorrence and disgust. The diminutive pimp would give the woman a once over as she tucked her chin inward, avoiding his gaze as the blood vessels in Mac Deezy’s eyes widened.

Mac Deezy: Ho did I ask you our location?

Woman #1 (whispering): No Daddy.

Mac Deezy: Did my ears deceive me or did I not ask you a question? Speak up, ho!

Woman #1 (louder): No Daddy!

Mac Deezy: Good. Now, IF and WHEN Mac Deezy wants to be reminded where he is, he will refer to his navigation system. And IF Mac Deezy wanted to hold a conversation with someone who ain’t ignant, he would talk in the muthafuckin’ mirra. Speak out of turn again and Mac Deezy will make it so that you DO not talk. Now are we clear?

Woman #1: Yes Daddy.

Mac Deezy: Bitch isshu crazy?! I SAID DON’T SPEAK OUT OF TURN!!

Mac Deezy would raise his cane to lash the woman in the face before Infinity quickly leaned over and tugged him round to remind him that they were still on live television. Mac Deezy would quickly pat his permed hair and fan himself.

Mac Deezy: This trick is gunna have me catch a case, dawdy. And I goin’ back to that join fo’ no ho.

Infinity: Er…anywho. We didn’t come to shoot the breeze and talk about hos. I specifically came here to speak on these Ties of Blood muthafuckas.

Mac Deezy: Fo’ real do. Especially this Drew Michaels cat. See little Drew Drew thinks of himself like a hero.

Infinity: Nigga you ain’t no hero. Watchu is…you’s a goddamn racist nigga!

Mac Deezy: See Drew – when you say some dumb shit like we’re bringin’ our people down by doin’ what we do and you show images of black folk runnin’ around and addin’ an angry rhetoric…

Infinity: DAMN MY NIG! BUSTIN’ OUT THE HEAVY VERBAGE ON YO DOO DOO DUMB ASS!

Mac Deezy (clears his throat): Back to the point. Drew Michaels says he’s a man of the people. He says that he fights for those who cannot fight for themselves. But what he didn’t tell y’all was that Drew Michaels is a bigot.

Infinity: Like muthafuckin’ Kramer, y’all. Preach on, my nig.

Mac Deezy: It’s true – Drew Michaels thinks that black people are helpless to overcome the tyranny that his people put my people through since the foundation of the red, white, and blue. He insinuates that myself and my associate are ignorant and, likewise, so are our people. Well, Mister Michaels; forgive us for not conforming to your social norm.

Infinity: Damn, nigga. Goin’ all ‘Good Will Hunting’ on dey asses.

Mac Deezy: Forgive us for creating a lifestyle dubbed “hip hop” and turn it into a lucrative cultural phenomenon. Forgive us for, after years of physical and mental bondage, finding by some means to create currency to uplift ourselves from the oppressive poverty systems like Capitalism and, ironically enough, Communism create. How dare we, innovators of industry and art continue in our ways that set us apart from you, the white majority that have kept us ignorant to the power of the almighty dollar.

The only person that needs to be ashamed is you Drew Michaels when I beatchou Brokeback ass so hard, all you’ll be seeing is black and blue.

HoodStarz, my nigga – we go dumb…but we stay hood.

Fade to black.

Scene opens to Eric Scorpio and The Celt sitting at Jaro's desk, looking over their contracts. Jaro has a raised eyebrow as he stares at the two.

Scorpio: FMW is about to be set up to a new level now that I'm here. No one is going to get in my way.

Jaro keeps a stare on the rookies.

Jaro: Oh yeah? You think you can compete with the already established talent?

Scorpio: Oh yeah. You watch, give me a chance and you'll have no choice but to move me to the main event.

Jaro: Oh yeah?

Scorpio: Oh yeah.

Scorpio signs his contract with FMW.

Jaro: Well, welcome to the FMW. Glad to have you aboard.

Scorpio smiles and Jaro shifts his gaze over to The Celt.

Jaro: And what about you, Jaro looks at a form infront of him... The Celt?

The Celt grins something ugly.

The Celt: Aye.

Jaro: Everything alright with the contract?

The Celt: Aye. Iam a'in a luke at it 'ight now. I see yoo ah'ready 'ave a manky lush and takin' the mick. Iam diffrnt. Iam ot a sorry sap. I see you ready ot a knob end as 'ell. Jaro, you're lucky Iam here, or this 'oster would suck.

Jaro and Scorpio look at The Celt.

Scorpio: ....what the...

Jaro: Yeah.......

The Celt grins again and signs the contract.

Jaro: Right... Now get the fuck out of my office.

Scene fades.

“I’m Shipping up to Boston” hits the speakers as the O’Rions, Andrew and Alex, make their way to the ring.

Buster: Ladies and gentlemen may I introduce to you the first team in this tag team match up. Coming in at a combined weight of 490lbs. They both hail from Halifax Nova Scotia. Here are the O’RRRRIIIOONNS!

Stone: Oh I’ve been looking forward to this one. The O’Rions and the Revolution finally in a match against one another.

Phantom: Yes, they’ve been at each other’s beaks lately. This one should be interesting, we finally get to see the O’Rions tag team. Lets see if they live up to all the hype.

“Cigaro”-System of a Down plays through out the arena as The Revolution comes out.

Buster: And their opponents. Weighting in at a combined weight of 475lbs. Ladies and gentleman, I give to you, GLS and Jackie Test, the REVVVOLUTION!

Stone: And Jackie Test and GLS run into the ring ready for a fight but the ref isn’t letting anything happening. The O’Rions and the Revolution are at a stand off but the ref is ordering them into their respective corners.

Phantom: There’s the bell and it looks like GLS and Alex O’Rion are starting things off here with a lock up.

Stone: Alex quickly turns it into a headlock but GLS reverses into a hammerlock. Alex elbows out and we’re at a stand off. Here’s a second lock up and again Alex gets in a side headlock, but GLS lands a side suplex to get out.

Phantom: Ohhh, I think he got the better of Alex right there. The crowd isn’t really happy with move but GLS seems pleased with himself.

Stone: Alex gets to his feet and it looks like GLS is calling for a test of strength. Alex accepts and…oh! GLS tried for a kick in the gut but Alex spun around and delivered a straight punch to GLS’s nose.

Phantom: Aha! I knew those O’Rions would break the rules eventually.

Stone: I’m not sure hitting jabs is agents the rules. Either way it doesn’t matter; Alex just landed another punch and before GLS could hit back Alex spun around.

Phantom: Ah, I see Alex’s bar brawls have paid off.

Stone: Alex hits a punch to the chin yet again and GLS is getting really pissed off here.

Phantom: Stupid Andrew. Stop laughing!

Stone: They’re just having some fun. Alex spins around and GLS gets in that kick to the gut. GLS runs on the ropes and hits a clothesline to get back in the game!

Phantom: GLS makes a tag to Jackie Test, who comes in running on the ropes but Alex quickly reversed into a back body drop.

Stone: Alex gets Test to his feet and locks in a hammerlock while dragging him into the O’Rion corner. Alex tags in Andrew, and Andrew flys over the top rope and lands behind Test and bends down?

Phantom: But Alex is still in the ring and pushed Test over Andrew, and Andrew turns it into a school boy roll up!

Stone: One! Two! Test kicks out!

Phantom: Wow, I can’t believe the O’Rions just used a childhood prank as a wrestling move, how unprofessional!

Stone: Why? It was clever, unexpecting, and effective.

Phantom: Oh, why don’t you just marry them! You have no reason to respect the O’Rions.

Andrew drop kicks Jackie Test.

Phantom: Just call the match.

Stone: Will do. Andrew picks up Jackie Test and delivers a snap suplex right to the mat. Andrew takes advantage and gets in a pin. One, Two, and Test kicks out again.

Phantom: Come on Test, fight back!

Stone: Andrew runs on the ropes but Jackie Test fires back with elbows right in O’Rion’s forehead! There’s a kick to the gut and spinning DDT to finish it off.

Phantom: Pin him, pin him!

Stone: He’s not. Jackie Test tags in GLS and whips Andrew into his corner. Test hops back onto the apron, but he starts chocking Andrew with the tag string! This is dirty fighting!

Phantom: Clean enough for me. And the Revolution isn’t done. GLS is jabbing Andrew in the face, much like how Alex was doing to him earlier! I love it!

Stone: As you can see, Alex has gotten angry at this taunt and has tried to enter the ring, but the ref has stopped him form entering the ring, making Andrew wide open for a double team assault!

GLS takes a running start, and boots Andrew in between the legs. Jackie Test lets go of to tag rope so GLS can kick him in the gut and deliver a powerbomb in the middle of the ring right when the ref has turned around.

Stone: What a powerbomb! GLS has Andrew’s leg hooked and this could be it! One! Two! OH, Andrew kicks out before Alex can get in there to break up the pin.

Phantom: I don’t think GLS and Jackie Test are done with the double-teaming! GLS has Andrew up for a powerbomb again and Jackie Test is on the top rope. This is going to be awesome!

Jackie Test leaps off with a clothesline, but before he can make impact with Andrew, Alex runs in and takes out GLS’s knee, making him stumble forward and making Jackie Test hit nothing but the mat.

Stone: Way to go Alex!

Phantom: What a cheater!

Stone: Now Andrew is up and I think he wants a little revenge. Bam! Drop kick to Jackie Test’s chest and he’s out of here! Now GLS comes in for an assault but Andrew hits an impressive back body drop. Andrew has a hold of GLS’s legs now and this can’t be good!

Phantom: I’ve heard of this. One of the O’Rion’s finishers, the Eye of the Hurricane, or something. Move G.L.S. MOVE!

Stone: It is the Eye of the Hurricane! Andrew swings GLS up with a slingshot but only to be met with Alex’s NS Pride super kick! GLS’s chin just snapped backwards and this could be it! Andrew makes the cover, one! Two! And GLS gets his foot on the ropes!

Phantom: No, it was placed their by…is that Brody McBrayer?

Stone: Oh, I should have seen this coming! The Revolution and Body McBrayer is the newest stable in the FMW. They call themselves The Trinity, and I guess they want to make themselves known by taking some punishment to the O’Rions.

Phantom: Haha, if I got to pick two people to take my anger out on I’d probably pick the O’Rions too.

Stone: Well I think Andrew is doing the best he can to get this match over and done with. Andrew makes a tag to Alex who comes in eyeing Brody, while dragging GLS into the center of the ring.

Phantom: Alex drops a few elbows, and then delivers a knee drop to the head of GLS.

Stone: Jackie Test is calling for the ref? I think he’s complaining about a knee injury?

Phantom: This could be serious.

As the ref goes towards Jackie Test, Alex O’Rion runs on the ropes towards a grounded GLS but Brody grabs a hold of Alex’s boot, making him fall face first onto the mat. Andrew gets off the apron and starts to chase Brody, but he eventually gives up after Brody gets to the other side of the ring.

Phantom: Ha! Now THAT is smart wrestling.

Stone: GLS gets to his feet and dived to Jackie Test for a hot tag! Jackie Test runs in a baseball slides Alex right in the ribs! Ouch!

Phantom: Jackie Test is taking advantage of this injury by locking in an abdominal stretch. That’s got to hurt.

Stone: Yes, and may I take this time to point out that the Revolution may have lost this match if it weren’t for Brody McBrayer.

Phantom: Please. Brody has done nothing but cheer on these men. He’s like a cheerleader.

Stone: How many cheerleaders do you know that catch touchdowns in the game?

Phantom: Oh please. Look! Alex is trying to fight out but Jackie Test is out powering him.

Stone: Yes, Test is delivering some harsh shots to Alex’s stomach. I think he really wants Alex to tap here.

Phantom: Alex his elbowing Jackie Test in the back with that arm strength he has left. This may not last long though.

Alex gets in his fifteenth or so elbow shot for Jackie Test to loosen his grip. When he does, Alex flips over and takes Jackie Test down to the mat with a side head lock.

Stone: Beautiful reversal from the O’Rion twin!

Phantom: I’ve seen better.

Stone: Uh huh. Alex gets Jackie Test to his feet and slams him down with a hip toss. This is Alex’s chance to make a tag to Andrew, but Test has a hold of Alex’s trunks!

Phantom: He’s not going anywhere!

Stone: No, even with Andrew holding out his hand they are still a few inches a part. Wait! Alex is stomping his way out and I think he’s getting a tag in!

Phantom: No! I think Brody just blind-sided Andrew and made him fall off the apron. Awesome.

Stone: Oh come on! Brody should be out of here for that!

Phantom: Nope. Andrew wasn’t the legal man.

Stone: Ugh, at least the crowd agrees with me. And I think the ref just gave Brody a warning. One more and he’s out! Anyway, Jackie Test is in control of this match now and he has O’Rion on his feet, but quickly follows up with a power slam. Test gets Alex to his feet again, and this time he nails a German suplex and turns it into a bridge pin! One! Two! No, Alex barley kicks out!

Phantom: Damnit, they really need to put away Alex here.

Stone: Jackie Test makes a tag to GLS and he comes running in with a clothesline! GLS gets O’Rion’s hair and gets him to his feet. GLS has the Alex’s leg hooked and, oh god, I think he’s going for the Shellshock, his Fisherman Suplex Finisher!

Phantom: No, Alex is fighting out. Come on GLS just hit the damn move!

Stone: Alex clubs GLS’s head and manages to get out! Alex spins around and nails a spine buster on GLS! Alex still has his legs hooked, and there it is! Alex has the Ripe Tide, his version of the Sharp Shooter, locked in! It could be over right here!

GLS crawls for the ropes but doesn’t make it because Alex gets back into the center of the ring. When it looks like GLS is about to tap, Brody grabs Alex’s ankle and pulls him out of the ring. The crowds, and the ref, don’t like it.

Stone: Ha! Here we go! The ref is banning Brody from ringside! Wait, wait, I spoke to soon. The O’Rion’s want a piece of him first!

Andrew runs for literally out of nowhere with steel steps in his hand, and hits Brody in the gut.

Phantom: That’s a DQ!

Stone: Nope. Like you said before Phantom, he’s not the legal man. Hell, he’s not even in this match.

Phantom: But…but…

With Brody bent down, Andrew gets him in a gut wrench, and turns it into a Canadian Destroyer.

Stone: Bluenose Drop on the ground! Brody won’t be getting up any time soon!

Phantom: Stone look in the ring!

In the ring, the Reolution is signaling for one of their finishers, The Vanburner. GLS whips Alex off the ropes for the momentum, but instead of coming back Alex hooks onto the ropes. Thing is, Jackie Test didn’t see this happen, so he jumps up and gives GLS a neck breaker thinking it was Alex. Before he can realize he made a mistake, Alex clotheslines him out of the ring.

Stone: What a miscommunication by the Revolution, and Alex tags Andrew in. G.L.S is finally getting to his feet, and is met by a spine buster by Andrew. This crowd is on its feet as he sets his man up for The 2-4, and he hits it!

Phantom: And Alex just jumped into the ring, this match is out of control, he isn’t the legal man!

Stone: Andrew is setting up to slingshot G.L.S. but wait! There is Jackie Test running into the ring and NS PRIDE! Alex just nailed Jackie Test with a blindsiding NS Pride! Test may be out in the ring.

Phantom: Won’t anyone take control of this match!

Stone: And Andrew throws G.L.S. into the air and there it is NS Pride completing the Eye of the Hurricane! Both members of the Revolution are out as Alex jumps onto a turnbuckle and Andrew goes for the pin!

Alex and Crowd: 1….2….3!

Andrew & Alex O'Rion (4.35aps + 4.45aps + 1.5avs= 10.30 Total)
GLS & Jackie Test (4.25aps + 4.28aps + 1.1avs = 9.63 Total)

Stone: And the O’Rions win it here in convincing fashion. It looks they may have just put the entire tag division on notice that they are more than just hype!

Phantom: Their still stupid Canadians.

The O’Rions head into the crowd to celebrate with the fans as the shot changes.

James McDaygo is seen walking down the hallway by himself when a man in a suit comes running up behind him.

Man: Mr. McDaygo! Mr. McDaygo! A minute of your time?

McDaygo stops and turns around.

McDaygo: Sure, what’s on your mind.

Man: Thank you. My name is Michael O’Malley. I’m a promotional representative for Guinness Beer. We want to make you our spokesperson.

McDaygo: Me? Why?

O’Malley: You’re a very popular figure here at Full Metal Wrestling and the company is really picking up so we thought that it would be in both of our interests to bring you in as our posterboy.

McDaygo: What’s in it for me?

O’Malley: Well…

O’Malley reaches into a kitbag that he is carrying with him.

O’Malley: …you would become the official “Guinness Promotional Heavyweight Champion of the World."

O’Malley pulls out a championship belt and slings it over McDaygo’s shoulder.




O’Malley: ….and there would be a hefty salary involved.

McDaygo: Oh? I’m liking where this is going.

O’Malley: $90,000 American, plus public appearances, and $5,000 bonuses for each match that you win.

McDaygo: You’ve got yourself a deal!

McDaygo reaches out and shakes O’Malley’s hand.

O’Malley: That’s not all though. We’re prepared to offer you unlimited Guinness beer for the time that you work with us.

McDaygo: Holy fuckin’ shit! You just made my day!

O’Malley: You just made ours. Our lawyers will contact you shortly to hammer out the details. For now, I’ve got other business to tend to, and I know that you have a match to concentrate on. Best of luck to you tonight.

McDaygo: Thanks, mate.

The two shake hands before O’Malley turns and walks away.

The camera fades to black with McDaygo smiling like a madman, rubbing his brand new belt.

"Cult of Personality" by Living Color hits the speakers as cYnical and Smoochy make their way to the ring.

Cherry: The following match is scheduled for one fall, introducing first, weighing in at 190lbs and being accompanied to the ring by Smoochy da Frog, cYnical!

Stone: cYnical, I know, isn't in the best of moods right now. He lost of Ethan Black in the quarterfinals of the Road to Glory Tournament at Death Row and he's out to prove to everyone that that was just a fluke.

Phantom: Most definitely, he's got a lot to prove tonight, but then again, losing to the Full Metal Champion isn't that bad of a thing to have happen. What may have been the issue, is how he lost.

Stone: You're right. He was duped by his former runningmate Styxx of all people! A cold stab in the back that cYnical couldn't have seen coming. If I were Styxx, I'd get the hell out of dodge, because cYnical will be gunning for him.

"Freak on a Leash" by Korn hits the speakers as X and St. Michael Dreamkiller emerge through the curtains.

Stone: Speaking of proving a point. X is in the same boat as cYnical. He lost in the quarterfinal round to Drew Michaels and I can tell you right now that he won't be an easy target here tonight.

X storms the ring and slides in and attacks cYnical from behind.

Stone: X definitely isn't wasting any time at all right now.

Phantom: Let's hope that he doesn't burn himself out too quickly here.

Stone: X with an Irish whip into the ropes which he follows up with a big clothesline. He wastes no time as he picks cYnical back up and hits him with a quick suplex. cYnical reverses the suplex and hits a suplex of his own. cYnical smartly applies an armbar on X while he's down.

Phantom: Smart move there by cYnical to slow the pace down.

Stone: I wonder where these two will end up after that draft?

Phantom: I really don't know at all, man, I'm actually really excited by that draft.

Stone: Why's that?

Phantom: I have my reasons.

Stone: cYnical lets up on the armbar now and pulls X back up to his feet. Kick to the stomach by cYnical, he follows up with a reverse DDT.

Phantom: He just planted X's head into the mat.

Stone: Big kick to the stomach by cYnical on the fallen X. cYnical doesn’t let up, stiff kick to the back of X as he tries to make his way back to his feet. Irish whip by cYnical, he follows up with a back body drop on X. X is back to his feet now and counters cYnical attack with a back elbow. He wastes no time as he hit cYnical with a modified gutbuster. X quickly goes for the pin, trying to catch him off guard. 1… 2… cYnical kicks out before the three.

Phantom: That’s good wrestling right there. X jumps on every opportunity he can get.

Stone: He’s got cYnical in a headlock now. cYnical is fighting back, he tosses X towards the ropes with an Irish whip. He throws his shoulder into X as he rebounds back towards him but there’s no effect. X just rolls through cYnical offence, knocking him to the ground.

Phantom: I don’t think cYnical saw that coming. He’s forgetting that X is huge.

Stone: X laughs it off and encourages cYnical to try again. cYnical bounds off the ropes and comes towards X, X braces himself but cYnical dives through his legs. He’s up and hits the big man with a dropkick to the back. Now THAT’S smart wrestling.

Phantom: What? No! He was supposed to get knocked on his ass again!

Stone: X can’t believe that this happened. Look at the look of disbelief on his face. X is back to his feet, cYnical dashes towards him and shocks him with a floating DDT.

Phantom: He’s definitely not used to getting beat up by a guy smaller than him.

Stone: cYnical’s not a small guy though.

Phantom: I never said that he was small. I said that he was smaller than X.

Stone: Meh. cYnical has a lot of heart though. X is back up to his feet now, he looks furious. He takes a swing at cYnical but he ducks out of the way of the punch. Another punch and another miss. cYnical is taunting X. Big punch by X, he connects, cYnical dodged the wrong way!

Phantom: That's gotta fuckin' hurt!

Stone: X follows up with a clothesline, he just turned cYnical inside out! X goes for the cover! 1... 2... kick out by cYnical.

Phantom: Dreamkiller doesn't look too impressed. He's yelling at X to keep up the offensive.

Stone: X picks cYnical back up to his feet and throws him into the ropes, cross body by X! CYNICAL CAUGHT HIM! HOW THE FUCK!? He's calling for it! CYNAPLEX!

Phantom: cYnaplex by cYnical out of nowhere! Holy shit!

Stone: He's going for the cover! 1... 2...3!!! cYnical just beat nailed the cYnaplex out of nowhere and defeated X! That was insane!

Phantom: I totally didn't see that coming. I thought that X was in control of the match...

Cherry: Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of this match... cYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYnical!!!

cYnical (4.25aps + 2.1avs = 6.35 Total)
X (0.00aps + 0.1avs = 0.10 Total)

Stone: I still can't... wow... he just... out of nowhere... the hell?!

St. Michael Dreamkiller slides into the ring behind cYnical who is celebrating the win with Smoochy da Frog.

Stone: Dreamkiller is in the ring! Cane to the back of the head of cYnical! And Smoochy! Dreamkiller just knocked out cYnical and Smoochy!

Dreamkiller bends down and helps X back up to his feet. He shouts loudly at X, berating him for his quick defeat. X takes Dreamkiller's verbal punishment, looking very somber. However, in an act to prove himself to his master, X abruptly drills cYnical to the ground with the Abyss.

Stone: Oh my god! Somebody needs to get this maniac under control!

Phantom: It sure won't be Dreamkiller. He loves every minute of it!

X and Dreamkiller stand over top of cYnical and Smoochy's bodies and raise their arms in victory.[/i]

Stone: This is completely backwards! cYnical and Smoochy should be standing there... not X and Dreamkiller! As light-hearted as cYnical has been in recent weeks, you gotta believe he will want revenge on these two.

Phantom: And don't forget about Styxx. cYnical may have his hands full when it comes to handing out silver platters of revenge!

The scene opens up with Homicide walking through the backstage area. He passes a few crew members and then comes up to Ties of Blood who are sitting on a crate talking with each other about their upcoming match.

Homicide: Hello hello hello.

Ekstreme: What do you want?

Spruance: Get the hell outta here, would ya? We’re busy.

Homicide: Whoa! What’s with the hostilities? I come in peace.

Spruance: What the hell do you want?

Ekstreme: Make it quick.

Homicide reaches into his pocket and pulls out some business cards.

Homicide: Well boys, as you saw tonight, I trounced The Sublime and Flare. The Sublime is one half of the tag team champions and I beat him… I’m happy with that. I’d like to offer my services to the three of you.

Michaels: Services?

Homicide: Yes, the services of the Homicide Protection Agency. If you need protection at any time, I’ll be there to do it.

Homicide hands around his cards to the three members of Ties of Blood who read them and just toss them away.

Ekstreme: Like we need protection from anyone. Look at us!

Spruance: Get the hell out of here!

Michaels: Look, do me a favour and just walk away, would you?

Homicide: Fine, but don’t blame me if one day you three get your asses handed to you. You’ll be wishing that you guys had hired me to protect you.

Spruance: LEAVE!

Homicide turns and walks away from the group.

Homicide: You’ll be sorry.

Spruance: Oh fuck off, would ya?

The scene fades to black with Ties of Blood laughing at Homicide as he walks away.

A Table is set up in the ring, and from behind the curtain come 3 Referees, pushing 3 Kegs of Un-labeled Beer.

Phantom: WOAH DADDY! LOOK AT THIS!

Stone: Is this the Drunken Rules Match?

Phantom: I don’t care what match it is! Free Beer at work!

Stone: Ladies and gentlemen, the following Match is rated MA, for a Mature Audience 15 years or Over. It Hopefully contains Adult themes, Drug Use and Strong Drunken Violence.

Phantom: Don’t spoil it for the little kiddies Stone. They need to learn early!

“Peace Sells” by Megadeath hits the speakers as Styxx comes out from behind the curtain, as the bell rings three times to begin introduction.

Cherry: The following contest is to be contested under Drunk Rules, and will be decided by one fall. Introducing First, from Stingray, Australia, representing the Black Covenant and weighing in at 300 pounds, STYXX!!!

Stone: James McDaygo and Styxx have been nickering back stage for some while now about who can hold their beer better, and prior to Death Row, James McDaygo laid out the challenge for this match here tonight of FMWrestling.com to settle the debate once and for all.

As Styxx Approaches the ring, he eyes off the Un-Labeled Booze in the keg. He then Rolls into the ring.

Phantom: Do you think he’s sober now, or has he had a few “Warm Ups?”

Stone: You’d be stupid to warm up today. You need to hold all the beer you can. But Styxx, being the professional he is, would have spent and hundred of dollars and gotten wasted in the past 24 hours.

“Barroom Hero” by Drop Kick Murphy’s Blasts over the PA System, and James McDaygo runs through the crowd towards the ring, as the newly crowned “World Guinness Champion”.

Cherry: And his opponent, Representing the MWA, weighing in at 235 pound, from Boston, Massachusetts, James McDAYYYGO!

Stone: HERE IS THE GUINNESS POSTER BOY! There has been a lot of talk over which wrestler can hold their beer better, the Australian, or the Irishman, and from the show of Guinness support, they like the Irishman’s stomach and liver.

Phantom: Both are famous for their beer, and alcoholism, but I’d give my support to the Irish. I don’t like dirty Convicts criminals.

Stone: You racisit pig.

Phantom: Takes one to know one OHHH I went there.

Stone: Thanks for having some level; of maturity over your job Phantom. Very professional. Both men are in the ring. Lets send it up to Buster Cherry.

Cherry: Before the match, the contestants must down 5 pitchers of beer each. If one finishes before the other, they are not aloud to attack. Once both contestants have finished, the match begins.

The crowd pops.

Cherry: For tonight, we have decided to use a Belgium Beer, so the beer of choice tonight is… SATAN RED AMBER ALE!!!

The Crowd Pops as the Label appears on the screen.



Stone: It’s a nice beer. I’ve tried… PHANTOM!

Phantom: What? Its their own fault for leaving the beer unguarded.

The sound of glass breaking a liquid spilling is heard off camera. In the ring, 10 pichers of beer are being placed on the table in front of Styxx and McDaygo.

Phantom: Did you just bitch slap my beer?

Stone: Don’t drink on the job.

Phantom: But that still leaves us with the problem of you bitch slapping my beer.

The Bell Sounds.

Stone: And we are underway! Styxx and McDaygo go for the beer, and down them quickly. They are already half way through.

Phantom: I could have been…

Stone: No one wants to know Phantom. Styxx and McDaygo slam their empties down. Both quick to grab their second.

Phantom: You know Stone, to get the real essence of the match, we should probably be Drunk too. I’m getting us a pitcher.

Stone: No. I wouldn’t let you have a glass, you’re not having a pitcher. McDaygo seems to be going slightly slower than Styxx here. Styxx is halfway through the third, bvut McDaygo is a little behind.

Phantom: LIKE US! We need to catch up, or we will be very much behind for post show drinks!

Stone: Keep trying Phantom, and you will find yourself of the receiving end of a pink slip.

Phantom: you can’t fire me.

Stone: Back to what I’m employed for McDaygo and Styxx on their 4th pitchers. They are bulldozing them. Phantom, what is their time on the pitchers?

Phantom: Wha?

Stone: Did you time these guys like I asked you to before the show?

Phantom: …

Stone: Are you really the Beer obsessed that you can’t even do your job?

Phantom: No…

Stone: Then prove me wrong. Styxx has Just finished his 4th Pitcher and has reached for his final one.

Phantom: Meanwhile, McDaygo is still downing his 4th, lovely… golden… amber… delicious…

Stone: That’s it, you are not to talk until the fighting starts. McDaygo a little behind, but they aren’t in a beer drinking Race. Styxx has just about finished his final beer. McDaygo picks his final pitcher, as the Guinness Champ takes his time.

Styxx Finishes his final pitcher, and flips the empty upside down, before slamming it on McDaygo’s head, like a crown.

Styxx: Hurry UP!!!!

Stone: Well, we know Styxx is ready to go.

McDaygo shakes it off and finishes his beer. He slams the empty pitcher down on the table. Two referees take the table outside and the bell rings again.

Stone: And the fighting is underway!

Phantom: And so is my commentary. Styxx and McDaygo lock up with a standard collar and Elbow Tie up, and the bigger man Styxx has the advantage. BUT MCDAYGO FALLS DOWN, and Styxx falls flat on his face.

Stone: I don’t think that fall was intentional Phantom. I think the Beer is kicking in. Needless to Say, McDaygo runs at the ropes, and gives a Drop Kick to the head of Styxx.

Phantom: If that’s a drop kick, I’ll go He! That was more of a leg splat.

Stone: Never the less, it was effective. McDaygo on his feet, standing Moonsault to the fallen Styxx, who is trying to get up. I wouldn’t be trying too many of those moves if I was McDaygo.

Phantom: but how will he do the Guinness plunge Or the Barley Mowe? Stone, you’re stupid. You can’t take the high flyer out of McDaygo!

Stone: You’re right. We will have a lovely ring afterwards, wont we?

Phantom: Damn Straight. That’s why I bought you a Janitors uniform!

Stone: Lovely. Back to the ring now. Styxx has managed to get to his feet, and is looking for McDaygo. Actually where is McDaygo?

Phantom: Where I should be…

Camera Pans to McDaygo at the kegs of beer, mouth around the spout, drinking heavily. Styxx Walks over to him, and punches him in the stomach, before throwing him back into the ring.

Stone: McDaygo couldn’t even hold until the drinking begins next, and Styxx on the assault. He seems to be a bit more comfortable in this environment than McDaygo.

Phantom: It’s because he is Australian. They haven’t nicknamed this an “Aussie Rules” match for nothing.

Stone: Well, the Australian, lifts the smaller Irishman onto his sholder, and, I don’t actually know what to call what we just saw Phantom.

Phantom: He dropped McDaygo.

Stone: Yes, but what’s the move called, in your professional opinion.

Phantom: Dropping McDaygo.

Stone: OK Then, well Styxx goes in for a cover anyway, and McDaygo kicks out at two.

Phantom: Styxx picks McDaygo up to a vertical base, and drags him in for a short arm clothesline, but… misses?

Stone: I have never seen anyone MISS a short arm clothesline. Never the less, we are coming up to our first drinking interval now, where they have to down another two pitchers of beer, and the Guinness Champ appears to be coping with the alcohol better now, as he bounces off the ropes and goes to hit a bulldogs, but could not get a grip on the big man.

Phantom: But that hasn’t stopped McDaygo, as he bounces off the ground and gives a kick to the jaw…area of Styxx, who steps back.

The Bell Rings Once.

Phantom: BEER!!!!

Stone: No Talking. Both men have to drink two pitchers of beer now, according to the “Aussie Rules” Stipulation.

Phantom: They may have strong Livers and pump out the alcohol with sweat to make them sober again, lucky Bastards.

Stone: HEY, WHAT HAVE I SAID ABOUT YOU AND TALKING? ONLY WHEN THE FIGHTING IS ON!

Phantom: ….

Stone: Both McDaygo and Styxx and Grabbed both Pitchers of beer, and are trying to down them both at once, a good quarter of it isn’t getting into their mouths.

McDaygo and Styxx hold out proudly 4 empty pitchers of beer between them, but the referee looks at them mess on the floor and orders for another pitcher each.

Stone: The Referee has ordered party foul, more beer for all.

Phantom: YAY!

Stone: Except Phantom.

McDaygo and Styxx and hold their fresh beers in confusion, but don’t care and down them quickly anyway. A Single sound of the bell is heard.

Phantom: And the shackles are off as McDaygo and Styxx are back in action. Styxx Throws a right and, which knocks McDaygo down effortlessly, and himself in the process.

Stone: It didn’t hit. McDaygo couldn’t keep his feet. But McDaygo, back on his feet, climbing the turnbuckle, as Styxx slowly gets to his feet. McDaygo off the top with a Moonsualt, Styxx trys to catch him, but gets knocked down instead. McDaygo on top, One, Two, PUKE!

Phantom: Mcdaygo is the first to empty his Stomach. Look at that.

Stone: kids, turn off the TV and don’t tell mommy or daddy about Aussie Rules matches, Ok?

Phantom: well, I agree with that Stone, I still want my job next week. Meanwhile, the Alcohol has affected Styxx too, he is top rope bound.

Stone: This is very out of Styxx’s Nature to go there. McDaygo Struggles to his feet, what’s going to happen next?

Styxx comes off the top rope with a Double Axe Handle, But McDaygo moves out of the way at the last second.

Phantom: McDaygo could still see Styxx coming that’s how rarely and surprising it is for him to go high!

Stone: Do dis-agreeances there, as the Guinness Champion is on the move, bounces off the ropes, flying elbow to the side of Styxx’s head. It knocks Styxx all the way to the corner.

Phantom: Here we go though Stone, he may be as pissed as I want to be, but, he is a smart drunk. McDaygo could and should win this here.

From behind the curtain appears Scott Hall, Mcdaygo's managers, already pissed.

Stone: What is Scott Hall doing out here? He isn't billed to accompany McDaygo here.

Phantom: I don't know, but he is in a state I desire.

Stone: Well, regardless, he has attracted the attention of McDaygo, who is climbing the turnbuckle.

McDaygo Stops what he is doing and waves energetically at Hall, who is trying to enter the ring, but can't get up on the canvas.

Stone: And finally, a referee has decided to take him away from here and we can continure the match.

The Referee begins to escot Hall to the back as McDaygo sets Styxx up for the Guinness Plunge.

Phantom: And the poster boy doing his work. Here we go, Guinness PLUNGE!!!

McDaygo has Styxx ready of the Guinness Plunge, and Jumps to execute his finishing maneuver. His ankle though rolls as he trys to jump, and he just walls off the top onto his neck and shoulder area.

Phantom: Well, that was anti climatic.

Stone: So it would seem. And Styxx is actually laughing at him.

Amused, Styxx walks forward, but trips on his own feet, and lands ontop of McDaygo.

Stone: Is this counted as a pin? Refs counting, 1…2…3! Styxx Wins this!

Cherry: here is your winner, STYXX.

Styxx (3.72aps + 1.5avs = 5.22 Total)
James McDaygo (3.72aps + 1.1avs = 4.82 Total)

The referee Drags Styxx to his feet, and raises his arm. As if on cue, Styxx throws up horrendously.

Phantom: Here come the water works, I’m off for the bee… WHAT!?

Stone: Its over, its no longer needed, they took your beer away Phantom! I have a good friend in AA meeting though, let him help you.

Phantom: I don’t need help, I just don’t need to look at a grown man who can’t hold his Liquor.

Stone: What ever. Meanwhile, McDaygo has just realized what has happened and is looking directly at the vomiting Styxx.

Phantom: Poor guy, he must feel horrible. OH! I spoke too soon.

Stone: I think this is too much for McDaygo to bear, and he is throwing up again.

After a few seconds both men stop Puking, and “Mother” by Danzig hits the speakers, and Jaro makes his way to the ring.

Stone: HERE COMES THE GM! What would he want?

Phantom: He don’t look happy.

Jaro gets into the ring, Microphone in hand.

Jaro: WHO… did THIS… to MY ring?

Both Styxx and McDaygo look vacantly at Jaro.

Jaro: Let me ask in a language in you two can understand. Your girlfriend is hot… I want to bang her in this hell hole right now, but why are my feet wet?

McDaygo’s face lights up, and points at Styxx, who still stares off Vacantly.

Jaro: It was you two, wasn’t it. Well. Looks like you two have some house training to do.

Jaro then grabs both men by the backs of their head and makes them face their vomitty mess.

Jaro: BAD! Bad Employees!

Jaro then shoves them to the mat, face first, and rubs their faces in the puke. They both flail helplessly as the torture happens. He releases them and begins to walk to the back as Janitors and trainers rush from the back to clear the mess in the ring

Phantom: Did the GM just treat Styxx and McDaygo like pets who peed on a carpet?

Stone: He did, and sent a strong message tonight. Don’t stink up his ring like a toilet. Literally. Folks, we have to take a short break to clean this mess up, so we will be back after these messages.

The shot opens to the infirmary backstage as Adrian O’Rion is having the back of his head bandaged up and looked at.

Doctor: Adrian, I’m sorry but I can’t clear you for a match tonight.

Adrian: Why the fuck not!

Doctor: You have a concussion; if you aggravate it you could be done wrestling for good!

Adrian: And if I don’t wrestle those fuckin’ Black Covenant bastards win. I am going to beat Ethan Black tonight and aint no one gonna stop me!

Doctor: I’ll take this up with General Manager Jaro if I have to.

Suddenly a familiar voice cuts in.

Voice: Sorry Doc, your gonna have to clear him, else we might just need to rough you up.

The camera pans to show the O’Rion brothers standing against the wall nearby.

Alex: And you don’t really want that now do ya?

Doctor: Fine, go one, get your head torn open, what do I know. I’m only a doctor.

The doctor gathers his things and leaves.

Adrian: You two didn’t need to do that, I would have been fine.

Andrew: Yeah we know little bro, but some back up never hurts.

Alex: Besides we came to say we were sorry.

Adrian: Sorry, what the fuck for?

Andrew: We were too focused on our first tag match here against the Revolution.

Alex: Which we really didn’t need to worry about much.

Andrew: So we didn’t think about what might happen when we heard Ethan Black had to face an O’Rion, even when we heard that he had picked you.

Adrian: It’s all right.

Alex: No it’s not, we know your tough. All that shit Ethan was spewing was just that shit, but he got one thing right, you’re a tough son of a bitch. But it doesn’t mean you can beat an entire group of wrestlers by yourself. We should have been there to have your back.

Adrian: It’s all right.

Andrew: And if we see those bastards before the match we are gonna make sure they know what fuckin’ with an O’Rion means.

Adrian: Jesus, I said it’s fuckin’ all right already.

Alex: Huh?

Adrian: I’m almost glad they attacked me. Those bastard hit me with everything they have, and yeah I’m more fucked up for it. I’m seeing doubles, my heads killing me, and I can taste fuckin’ blood. But I’m still standing. For all the shit they did to me, I’m still standing. That means when I get into the ring with Ethan tonight I know I can take his best shot, and I will be able to fire one right back. I know what he can do, aint no one know what I can do yet.

Andrew: Right on!

Alex: Well said bro!

Adrian: On another note, you guys do have my back tonight right?

Andrew pats Adrian on his back as they head towards the ring.

Andrew: Anyone but Ethan wants you tonight, they’ll do it over our fuckin’ dead bodies.


“Fully Alive” by Flyleaf begins to blare through the speakers.

Buster Cherry: The following is a tag team contest. Introducing first, the team of T. Ekstreme and Drew Michaels, accompanied by Trey Spruance. This is TIES OF BLOOD!

Stone: And here comes the hardest of hardcore stable in all the FMW. Ties of Blood, lead by Drew Michaels.

Phantom: Hardest of Hardcore, you’re fucking kidding me right?

Stone: No, first you have the former violent one, Drew Michaels, his former rival in Trey, and the Hardcore Messiah in T. Ekstreme. Wait what the hell is this!

The Hoodstarz, Mac Deezy and Infinity, come rushing up behind Ties of Blood holding a barbed wire bat and crowbar respectively. As they charge Trey pushes Drew out of the way taking a barbed wire bat to the face for his troubles. T. Ekstreme on the other hand has his legs taken out from underneath him courtesy of a crowbar wielding Infinity.

Stone: Oh my god, the Hoodstarz are destroying Spruance and Ekstreme with those weapons.

Phantom: The new guys are making an impression, showing everyone what they will do to win.

Mac Deezy takes his barbed wire bat and places it across the throat of an already bleeding Spruance and does a leg drop across it, leaving a bloodied Trey spitting blood. Across from him Infinity grabs T. Ekstremes leg and pulls it out straight, before bringing the crowbar down across the front of the knee, a sickening snap echoing in the arena!

Stone: Oh my god, Spruance and Ekstreme have been injured. Thank god, here comes Drew Michaels, he chases the Hoodstarz into the ring away from the battered Ties of Blood members. Here come EMT’s for Trey and T. Ekstreme, and wait, I’ve just been told by the truck this will now be a handicap match between Drew Michaels and the Hoodstarz.

Phantom: Well that’s one way to work towards a win.

Stone: If they were looking to make an impression they certainly did. But I wouldn’t count out Drew just yet. He’s a dangerous veteran who almost beat Ethan Black in the Road to Glory Tournament, and now you know he will be out for revenge.

Phantom: Well now that his buddies are being dragged out back he is finally getting into the ring and he does not look happy.

Stone: Would you be? The ref calls for the bell, and it looks like Infinity will start this handicap match off for the Hoodstarz.

Phantom: Let’s see what these hood rats can do.

Stone: A collar and elbow tie up, and Drew Michaels pushes Infinity right into the corner and nails him with a right hand, and a left, and another right. The former violent one is teeing off on Infinity’s head, and Infinity can’t even get his arms up to defend himself.

Phantom: As a man who generally believes in stereotypes, I am sorely disappointed by this brawl from the hood boy.

Stone: You just don’t run out of racism do you?

Phantom: Syanide represent!

Stone: I need a new partner. Drew Michaels with a kick to the sternum, and a huge DDT. He goes for the pin 1….2….NO! Mac Deezy breaks up the pin. This is where Michaels is in trouble; he doesn’t have any one to back him up like the HoodStarz do.

Phantom: And Michaels is stalking over to the corner to get at Mac Deezy, but he made the mistake of turning away from the legal man in this contest, Infinity just kicked the back of Michaels knee, knocking him to the mat.

Stone: And there’s a tag, Infinity grabs onto Michaels leg as Mac Deezy steps into the ring and gives him a kick right to the knee again. Some very well done strategizing done by this young team here tonight. First a surprise attack to beat down the veteran team, and then targeting Michael’s knee.

Phantom: For once you and I agree, I was expecting a quick match, but not the way it has been going at all.

Stone: But this might be a rookie mistake, Mac Deezy is busy pointing at a woman in the crowd and yelling “HO! Where’s my money!” while Michaels gets back to his feet. Michaels comes up behind Deezy and brings him across his knee with a back breaker.

Phantom: That’s not right, he’s a pimp, and the Ho’s are the ones who spend the time on their backs!

Stone: You’d know wouldn’t you Phantom. And Michaels pulls Deezy back to his feet and connects with a huge german suplex, and he rolls through, and hits a second one, rolls through, and one last time with a release german! Drew with the pin, 1….2….Deezy gets the shoulder up! Drew doesn’t slow down, he pulls Deezy back up once again and lifts him into a huge stalling suplex!

Phantom: But here comes the handicap part of this match. Infinity takes Michaels down with a chop block, knocking both Drew and Deezy to the mat.

Stone: They are really taking it to that knee of Michaels, and Deezy crawls over and pulls himself to his feet. He grabs the leg of Drew and lifts him to the air, slamming him knee first into the mat, again, and again, and tags in Infinity who goes to the top rope as Deezy lifts that leg again.

Phantom: And Infinity jumps from the top and lands right on knee again. Look at Michaels scream, they are trying to completely destroy Ties of Blood here tonight with it’s last moving member.

Stone: Infinity goes to lift Drew up again, and Drew with a roll up! 1…..2…..Infinity kicks out. Michaels still has some fight left in him as he drags himself back to his feet. Infinity charges at him and is caught with a clothesline, only to bounce back up and be met by another one. He comes back up a third time only to be caught by an inverted atomic drop followed by THE WICKED DDT! Michaels with the pin 1……2…..DAMMIT! Deezy interrupts the count again. And he gets caught by a THE KILLSWITCH, Michaels has taken out both members of Hoodstarz and goes for the pin again on Infinity 1…..2……Infinity got his shoulder up again!

Phantom: You can see it Michaels thought he had this won. What’s he doing now? You don’t climb to the top turnbuckle with a broken knee!

Stone: Michaels is using every ounce of heart and conviction he has to fight through the pain and climb to the top. He sees Deezy getting to his feet and jumps and INFINITY PULLS DEEZY DOWN! Michaels just crashed and burned hard into the ref as his knee gave out. Infinity saw Michaels coming and pulled Deezy to the ground. Now the Ref and Michaels are both down!

Phantom: Why the hell is the pimp coming here now, hey, you can’t have that chair, that’s my footrest you dirty fucking thug!

Stone: Deezy goes to the top rope and tosses the chair to Infinity. Michaels comes to his feet and Mac Deezy comes off the top bulldogging Michaels RIGHT INTO THAT CHAIR SWUNG BY INFINTY!!!!

Phantom: Jesus, the Hoodratz have a move that actually works!

Stone: Mac Deezy the legal man goes for a pin as Infinity wakes the ref. No not like this 1….dammit…..2…..not like this…..3 GOD DAMMIT! The Hoodstarz stole this win from Drew Michaels.

Infinity & Mac Deezy (3.58aps + 3.78aps + 1.5avs = 8.86Total)
Drew Michaels & T. Ekstreme (4.44aps + 0.00aps + 0.8avs = 5.24 Total)

The camera cuts to backstage where we see War Machine leaving the Black Covenant locker room with something in his hands. A distraught Uncle Joey comes running up to him, and Machine quickly puts his hands behind his back.

Joey: War Machine! Have you seen Mr. Woodchuck anywhere? I can't find him, and we're supposed to do an interview soon.

War Machine: I don't know. There was a stack of 2X4's over by the concession stands. Maybe he's over there?

Joey: Good idea! I'll go check!

As Joey starts walking away, War Machine pulls his hands out from behind his back, holding Mr. Woodchuck! He pulls a can of lighter fluid from his back pocket and begins spraying it all over Mr. Woodchuck. He then retrieves a black zippo from his other back pocket.

War Machine: Hold up, Joey! I found him! He looks a bit feverish to me, though. As a matter of fact -

War Machine flips open the lighter and ignites the flame, setting fire to Mr. Woodchuck's foot.

War Machine: He's burning up! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

War Machine tosses the flaming puppet towards Joey, where it lands at his feet.

Joey: MR. WOODCHUCK! NOOOOOOOOOOO!

Joey falls to his knees, crying hysterically as he removes his jacket to put out the flames.

War Machine: MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!!!

War Machine is doubled over with maniacal laughter, and can barely speak. He walks away as Uncle Joey cradles the smoldering remnants of Mr. Woodchuck in his arms.

Joey: I'm so sorry I let this happen to you old friend. But I can fix it. I'll make us be together again.

Joey pulls a gun from his back pocket and puts the barrel in his mouth. A security guard tries to stop him, but Joey pulls the trigger and the camera switches back to Phantom and Stone as Joey's brains spray all over the guard.

Phantom: Tim White, eat your heart out.

Stone: This is such a sad day in FMW...

Phantom: Yeah. Tonight is going to cost Jaro a fortune on his insurance.

Stone: You really are heartless, aren't you?

Buster Cherry: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and is for the Full Metal Championship!

“I’m Shipping Up to Boston” by Dropkick Murphy begins to play.

Buster Cherry: Introducing first, from Halifax, Nova Scotia. Weighing in tonight at 205 lbs, this is ADRIAN O’RION!

Adrian walks unsteadily through the curtains, flanked by his brothers Alex and Andrew as the crowd erupts in cheers. As they make their way towards the ring Alex reaches out to steady Adrian who looks to be having trouble walking a straight line.

Stone: This may be a short match, it looks like Adrian can barely walk right now, let alone fight.

Phantom: Yeah, but you have to give it up for the champ, that makes twice, count it twice in one night he’s outsmarted the man. First picked the weaker O’Rion for this match, and then crushing his head before hand.

Stone: He’s too damned afraid of a fair fight against any of the O’Rions I think.

As Adrian steps into the ring Alex and Andrew turn to watch the ramp as “O Fortuna” begins to play.

Buster Cherry: And introducing first, from parts unknown, and weighing in at 277 lbs. He is the holder of the FULL METAL CHAMPIONSHIP, ETHAN BLACK!

Ethan Black followed by Eve, War Machine, Harlequin, and a very drunk looking Styxx walk through the curtains to a thundering ovation of boos.

Stone: And will you look at this, Ethan stops at the top of the ramp and looks to the crowd as Styxx, Harlequin, and the Ultraviolent champion War Machine advance toward the O’Rions. And Alex and Andrew look more than ready for this unfair fight? I don’t know how well they are going to fair against the Covenant.

Phantom: Unfair? I bet you anything those dirty Canadians were going to try and ambush Ethan in revenge. Thank god for the Black Covenant being prepared for typical Canadian cowardice. Those stupid Canucks are going to get a taste of what real power feels like.

Stone: I can’t believe you would say that.

Phantom: What, Canada sucks.

Stone: Wow, anyway the Black Covenant has almost reached the O’Rions and wait. The ref is getting between the two groups. I don’t believe this; the ref has just kicked both the Black Covenant and the O’Rions from ringside.

Phantom: But the Black Covenant hasn’t even done anything yet!

Stone: Neither side has, but remember General Manager Jaro has banned both sides from ringside in this match. He’s even kicked Eve. Both sides are walking towards the back, and Ethan Black is smiling, it’s like this is exactly what he wanted!

Phantom: It probably is, he knows he can beat Adrian, with or without a concussion, and didn’t want his brothers in the way. Jaro thought he was being smart banning all interference, but it probably played right into Ethan Blacks hands yet again.

Stone: I can only hope your wrong. Look at Adrian he’s supporting himself with the ropes and the match hasn’t even started yet. He should not be wrestling tonight; but you have to admire his heart in even coming out like this.

Phantom: His heart is fine, I question his head, that blow must have been harder than we thought. If he were smart he would just lie down while Ethan is getting into the ring,

Stone: I think he disagrees. Adrian O’Rion with a running start, he just dove through the ropes and tackled Ethan Black, Black hasn’t even gotten to the ring yet!

Phantom: That should be a disqualification right there!

Stone: For what the match hasn’t even started yet! And Adrian has ripped that cane of Ethan’s away from his hand. He just smashed the FMW Champion over the head with his own walking stick!

Phantom: See I told you, Canadians cheat!

Stone: Do unto others as you would have done onto you.

Phantom: What?

Stone: Black screwed with the O’Rions at Deathrow, I think Adrian is out for retribution. He has the champ by the hair and is pulling him to his feet. Irish whip, and Black just crashed knees first in the ring steps, almost flipping over them!

Phantom: He can’t do that to the champ!

Stone: Sure he can, he’s making Ethan Black slower. If he can’t keep up with the faster O’Rion he can’t hit him. It’s the smartest move Adrian could be making right now.

Phantom: Yeah but the champ won’t stay down, he’s getting to his feet as Adrian walks around the ring towards him.

Stone: This may be a mistake on the challenger’s part, letting the champion catch his breath. Adrian comes around the ring post, and ducks under a huge big boot from the champion, and retaliates with a dropkick to the other knee of Black. The Champ just landed awkwardly from that kick.

Phantom: O’Rion picks Black up and finally rolls him into the ring, it’s about time this match became official so Mr. Black can stop faking these injuries to build suspense.

Stone: Faking?

Phantom: If he had just got in the ring and beat O’Rion right away, the fans might have been disappointed. Ethan Black is truly a peoples champion.

Stone: You are such a fucking suck up.

Phantom: I know where the power is if that’s what you mean.

Stone: Anyway, getting back to our jobs, O’Rion is climbing the turnbuckle as Ethan comes to his feet once more. He jumps into the air and catches the champ with a crossbody, going for a pin. 1…..2….NO! Ethan powers out, throwing the smaller O’Rion off him like a rag doll.

Phantom: Adrian looks stunned by the power of the champ as he glances towards the ref who flashes a two sign.

Stone: He gets to his feet…Huge Big Boot from the champ! Adrians head just snapped backwards, that can’t help his concussion!

Phantom: He took too long getting composed after the two count and the champ made him pay.

Stone: And Black doesn’t want to wait for the youngest O’Rion to get his head back on straight as he starts to stomp his heel directly onto the forehead of the downed man. This is sick, blood is leaking from the back of O’Rions head again.

Phantom: And like the shark he is Ethan smells the blood in the water as he picks O’Rion up and nails him with another huge big boot! The kid might be out, finally!

Stone: But that’s not enough for Ethan is it, he’s mounting O’Rion and raining down punches on that damaged head. Each time he hits him, Adrian’s head is bouncing off the mat and more blood is staining it. This is just wrong!

Phantom: The ref will end this soon enough.

Ethan continues to punish Adrian’s face until suddenly Adrian’s arm reaches up and grabs Ethan’s right wrist.

Stone: My god! Adrian is still alive; he just pulled Ethan down into a vicious headbutt!

Phantom: Yeah use your hurt head to fight back, that’s real smart.

Stone: It is this time as Ethan has backed away holding his right eye, giving Adrian time to crawl back to his feet. Ethan hits him with a right hand, Adrian fires one right back, this is turning into a brawl!

Phantom: It was ever anything else?

Stone: No but these two are punishing each other in the center of the ring. I don’t know how O’Rion is fighting back with his injured head, but damned if he is backing down.

Phantom: And he catches the champ with a kick to the kidneys, follows it with a knee to the face, and then takes the champ down with a leg sweep.

Stone: He’s going back to his game plan by locking in a single leg boston crab and trying to take the legs out from under the champ. They are in the middle of the ring, there is now where for Ethan to go.

Phantom: It’s going to take a lot more than that to finish off the champion.

Stone: Not too much more, and remember he doesn’t have any friends to help him out this time.

Phantom: You don’t become a champion by relying on friends!

Stone: Could have fooled me at Deathrow.

Phantom: That’s not saying much; it’s easy to fool you.

Stone: Could you shut up and help me call the match already.

Phantom: I can’t shut up and do that, but unlike you I am a professional.

Stone: Right, and Adrian is still yanking on that leg, it looks like he is trying to rip it off of Ethan’s body.

Phantom: But then Ethan showed us why he was the champ by powering out of that move finally. Way to go champ!

Stone: That may be so but he has to use the ropes to pull himself up, the damage may be done. Here comes Adrian at a run.

Phantom: But the champ sees him and takes a swing.

Stone: Wow! Adrian just dove to the ground and slid through the champ’s legs to the outside. He has a hold of Ethan’s legs and yanks him to the mat. He’s dragging Ethan over to the ring post, and just crotched Mr. Black on the hard metal. And now he’s locking in the figure four leglock around that post, he’s really punishing those legs right now!

Phantom: If he isn’t careful he is going to get counted out.

Stone: He breaks the hold at 7 and rolls back into the ring, pulling the champion to his feet. Ethan pushes Adrian off the ropes and catches him with a vicious clothesline. Both men are down, Blacks holding his leg and Adrian may be out cold from that shot.

Phantom: And both men are getting to their feet slowly, Adrian has a far away look in his eyes. Probably thinks he’s back in Halifax right now.

Stone: He’s going to after this; Black has him from behind and delivers a beautiful german suplex. All of weight landed squarely on the back of Adrian’s head, he’s rolling around on the mat in pain.

Phantom: Look at the hand he just rubbed over the back of his head.

Stone: Oh my god, it looks like it was almost dyed red.

Phantom: And look at Ethan, he just grabbed that blood covered hand and smeared it over the face of O’Rion, even I think this is disgusting.

Stone: And the referee is checking on O’rion, wait, what’s this. Eve has come back to ringside! She’s banned! And she just handed Black that jeweled apple of hers.

Phantom: O’Rion is getting back up again, and that blood is really flowing from his head now, it’s making its way down his back.

Stone: I don’t know how much longer he can go tonight with that kind of blood loss. Oh, the ref has just seen Eve and is telling her to get back to the back.

Phantom: Again exactly like Ethan wants, he’s going to take a swing at Adrian with that jeweled apple, this should be good!

Stone: Not again! He takes the swing and YES! Adrian ducked the blow and knocked the apple to the ground, he grabs Ethan and DDT! DDT to the apple, the champ has been cut!

Phantom: Cheat! Where’s the ref when you need him!

Stone: He’s still telling Eve, who looks shocked at what she just saw, to get to the back. She’s leaving and as he turns Adrian tosses the apple from the ring and goes for the cover! 1……2……NO!

Phantom: YES! Ethan got the arm up, his face is a crimson mask but he got the shoulder up.

Stone: And Adrian looks shocked, he can’t believe that he didn’t finish it right there.

Phantom: What the hell is the crazy Canuck up to now?

Stone: I don’t know, he just went to outside the ropes and is watching as Ethan slowly gets to his feet again. Wait, Adrian jumps to the top rope and holy shit! He just used some sort of springboard haymaker on Ethan that was one hell of a punch! Ethan’s head just whipped to the side, and that may have been a tooth I saw sent flying there!

Phantom: Adrian goes for a pin again 1…..2…..Denied!

Stone: Ethan gets his foot up onto the ropes stopping the pin. Adrian looks frustrated, what does he have to do to keep this monster down!

Phantom: Kill him?

Stone: He may just have to. Adrian is climbing to the top rope, it looks like he wants to put this one away with a high risk move. Oh he goes, and the champ moved! Adrian just crashed and burned into the mat!

Phantom: The Champ was playing possum all along! And now while the referee is checking on the bloodied O’Rion, our champion Mr. Black is taking the padding off of that turnbuckle.

Stone: I have no idea what he is thinking but it doesn’t look good for Adrian does it?

Phantom: It didn’t look good for Adrian when he woke up this morning.

Stone: The champ has finished his work and turns back to Adrian who somehow is still getting back to his feet after all the punishment he has taken today. He’s looking at Ethan, and the devil with a bloody face is staring right back with a smile. Of all the arrogant things, he just challenged O’Rion to come and get him!

Phantom: And of all the stupid things to do, Adrian comes charging. Ethan sidesteps and Adrian runs straight into that exposed turnbuckle chest first. He comes bouncing off…

Stone:…and right into a kick to the gut from Ethan. Ethan lifts Adrian up and HOLY SHIT! He just POWERBOMBED the back of Adrians head into that exposed turnbuckle! Did you here that snap that might have been his skull!

Phantom: It looks like the ref wants to stop it, but Ethan pushes him away. That’s right champ; you finish this your way.

Stone: Look at that sick grin! He’s lifting a damned near unconscious Adrian up and there it is the Kindred Cross! The pin 1….2….3 damnit, damnit all to the hell!

Ethan Black (4.48aps + 1.5avs = 5.98 Total)
Adrian O'Rion (4.64aps + 0.9avs = 5.54 Total)

Buster Cherry: Your winner and still FULL METAL CHAMPION ETHAN BLACK!

Phantom: I knew he could beat this little Canadian like the insect he was.

Stone: What the hell is Black doing now, he just lifted Adrian. No! He’s calling for the Kindred Cross again!

The crowd cheers huge as the O’Rion twins Alex and Andrew charge the ring.

Stone: But here comes the cavalry! The O’Rion brothers are coming to save Adrian!

Phantom: They were banned by Jaro! What the fuck are they doing out here!

Stone: Saving the day, Andrew just tackled Black under the ropes and is laying into him with punches right here in front of the announcer booth. Alex is still in the ring checking on Adrian and trying to stop the bleeding. They need paramedics out here now!

Phantom: Well those don’t look like paramedics to me! It’s Styxx, Harlequin, and War Machine coming to save their boss!

Stone: Alex sees them coming too. He bounces off the ropes near us and dives over the ropes towards the Black Covenant, bowling them all over!

Phantom: This is stupid, it’s three on one, he can’t win.

Stone: I know compassion isn’t high on your list of things to know. But it’s amazing what brothers will do for each other. Alex is the first one up, and so is Harlequin. NS Pride, Alex just snapped the rookie’s head back with that super kick. And is now getting on top of Styxx with punches to keep him down. Wait where did War Machine go?

Phantom: Right here, War Machine just grabbed a steel chair and is getting into the ring.

Stone: Why the hell would he be getting into the ring…oh god no…he’s stepping over top of Adrian and raising that chair over his head!

Phantom: Do it, kill the runt!

Stone: He’s yelling at Alex, who’s just noticed him and dove into the ring. And OH MY GOD!

Phantom: That’s what you get for sticking your nose where it doesn’t belong.

Stone: Alex just took that chair shot the head to block Adrian and is down on all fours covering his brother. How is he even conscious?

Phantom: To stupid to stay down?

Stone: Well whatever it is War Machine doesn’t seem to like it as he raises the chair up again and smashes it into Alex’s back. Alex buckles but doesn’t fall and War Machine raises that chair again and brings it down hard. He’s cut the elder O’Rions back wide open, why the hell isn’t Alex moving?

Phantom: That brotherly love thing you said makes people stupid. He moves Adrian gets smashed.

Stone: Look at War Machine, he’s laughing as he brings the chair down again and again. He switches his grip and swings it underhanded, right into the face of Alex! Alex’s head snapped backwards from that blow! He’s out like a light right next to his brother.

Phantom: More importantly, Andrew is all alone now!

Stone: And he’s so busy punishing Ethan Black he doesn’t even notice that War Machine is looking at him, or that Styxx and Harlequin are up again and coming up behind him.

Phantom: Oh and here comes the good part.

Stone: Harlequin and Styxx grab onto Andrew and yank him off of Ethan. Andrew is trying to gte free but those two have him tight.

Phantom: War Machine helps the champ back to his feet and offers him his title. Ethan looks towards Andrew’s face and pushes the title right up against it. He’s telling him this is as close as he will ever get.

Stone: Just let him go, you won the match, this is over already.

Phantom: No it’s not, the Covenant is taking apart three of the most beloved FMW Superstars and sending a message to everyone in the back, and this will be the exclamation point.

Stone: And Ethan Black just broadsides Andrew O’Rions face with that FMW Championship, this is making me sick. His lackeys roll the out cold Andrew into the ring next to his brothers. All the Black Covenant members are standing over the bodies of the O’Rions.

Phantom: Will you look at that picture of unity. The most dominate faction in the FMW standing over their victims with arms raised, what a way to end the night.

The shot shows the Black Covenant holding up two pieces of gold in the ring as paramedics rush down to help the O’Rion Brothers before fading to black.